Shocking Discoveries
After years in rescue, I’d thought that I’d seen and heard it all. From the various behavioral problems to the sweetest gestures. One thing I learned is that every bird is different and every circumstance has a completely unique story.
There’s little known about “Mr I Gotta Take a Shot at Everyone,” Zonzilla here. Very little information was passed on about him when he came in. It’s not uncommon. Typically, when people surrender their once beloved pet, they’re too embarrassed or ashamed to tell us a bit about their likes and dislikes. The real excitement lies in figuring all this stuff out.
So far I’ve figured out a few things. Zonzilla here apparently doesn’t dig chicks. Not a good position to take when you live in a house full of estrogen and your primary caregiver has permanent menstrual syndrome to the 4th power. Still yet, he’s insistent on taking a shot at me from within the cage every chance he gets.
I get a brilliant idea…
Let’s see how brave his 12” butt is without the protection of the cage!
Actually, he’s still pretty brave! Of all the things I’ve done lately, that probably wasn’t my smartest move. In fact, it was pretty dumb. All of a sudden I was dealing with Edward Scissorbeak who was now loose in my house like a kamikaze pilot on sake with absolutely no apprehensions about being on the floor and charging your feet.
I can’t be sure, but I think he was still clutching his voodoo doll as he took off for full flight straight through my living room. Ok. So….uh… I guess he can fly after all.
Essentially, I’m screwed. Umm.. yeah I’m actually real screwed.
It took 2 hours to get him back in his cage. 2 long, terrifying hours as he flew from one room to the other. At certain intervals, I’d leave him alone just to see what he would do. Ok, the truth is, he’s got more energy than me. I needed to stop and rest, catch my breath, get a bigger towel, eat something, take a nap…. You get the idea. His spirit animal is a bobcat. Blue’s spirit animal is a guinea pig, apparently. Here’s the part where I hope she’s too ADHD to realize what an advantage the green thing has over me.
In the meantime, I decide to build a playgym just for him. Now real estate at my house is currently at a premium since half of my house is still under renovation. Of course, it’s been under renovation for 3 years now and instead of working on my master bathroom, which is currently at the city dump, I decide to be nice, take the day and build something fun for this guy in the hopes that he realizes I’m not a bad person and stops trying to eat me. I know. I know. Good luck with that!
2 trips to Home Depot and one to Hobby Lobby and we’re set. I spent the day measuring, cleaning, cutting, cursing under my breath, measuring again and eventually assembling what I figured was an awesome PVC playgym that was designed to hang above the cage and save space. Some of us aren’t lucky enough to have a bird room…yet. Some of us only have 1.5 birds, so technically I don’t NEED one. Technically.
I let him back out, rearrange his cage, add a forked Manzanita branch, which, I personally cleaned and drilled holes to hang it, added in some interesting toys that the kids and I made this afternoon and installed a sleeping perch high in the cage.
He steps out on the door, takes another shot at biting me. He lunges at me. I lunged back at him. The whole process really threw him off balance emotionally and he decides it’s in his best interest to make his way up to the new playgym. After a few minutes he starts checking it out, beaking on every toy I have hanging off it, checking out every step up to the top and then back down again. After a few minutes he finds his way back to the open door, looks dead at me and says “F**k yeah! Rock n roll!” and starts bobbing his head, eyes flashing.
Well… ok! I guess that answers a few questions. If nothing else, that should tell me what kind of home he came out of. I’m waiting for him to ask me for a beer and/or if I want to smoke a bowl or something. At this point, I wouldn’t be surprised. However, this isn't Colorado!
I hope a little less evil. :54:
***k yeah! Rock n roll! LOLOLOL omg. I would've died laughing. I'm sorry you went through 2 hours of zonzilla on the loose though :/ hopefully his charming side will emerge after a bit of adjustment time!
Lol
