Mental Health Vent/Discussion

[Rozalka]

I've been thinking if to write it or not... but I'll do:
As I've already written, I have Asperger's Syndrome. As a child many of my "friends" was doing everything just to make me angry - they were looking for many reasons in many small details - such as what do I like (love to parrots, favorite color, or even mentioned before "hetero, homo or bi" question) - after learning what I like/who I am, they were doing only annoying things using knowledge about me - such as "if you aren't homo, hetero neither be, you're a plant", "Szafirek/Limonka is stupid" etc...
I'm not sure if the past does matter.... but now I don't like talking about myself, especially about my hobbies. I avoid even saying in public that I like parrots... and when I hear during first class "say something about yourself/say what you like", I always start being so stressed... There's been few times when I was even too scared to say that I have/love parrots - then eg. I was saying I like music... despite I love parrots definitely more. The only exception is here cos I know you all are parrot lovers (I have the same thing on another forum related to my another hobby).

And now I dunno... yesterday I failed my English exam and I'm not sure what is the reason - my English is too weak or maybe I am too closed (or both) - there were many personal questions such as "Do you like animals?", "Do you have pets?", "Why do you have parrots?", "Why do you love parrots?" (gee I don't know the answer even in Polish) ,"What do you study?", "How do you help to protect environmental?" I hate so many questions about me...
Ps. please don't say my English is good cos nobody of you heard it.

 

[StormyPica]

I can relate, but with emotion. I can't cry, be angry, anything without internally cringing and trying to supress the emotion. I've tried working on it, but I just can't. It makes me feel horrible.

 

[BirdyBee]

I've been thinking if to write it or not... but I'll do:
As I've already written, I have Asperger's Syndrome. As a child many of my "friends" was doing everything just to make me angry - they were looking for many reasons in many small details - such as what do I like (love to parrots, favorite color, or even mentioned before "hetero, homo or bi" question) - after learning what I like/who I am, they were doing only annoying things using knowledge about me - such as "if you aren't homo, hetero neither be, you're a plant", "Szafirek/Limonka is stupid" etc...
I'm not sure if the past does matter.... but now I don't like talking about myself, especially about my hobbies. I avoid even saying in public that I like parrots... and when I hear during first class "say something about yourself/say what you like", I always start being so stressed... There's been few times when I was even too scared to say that I have/love parrots - then eg. I was saying I like music... despite I love parrots definitely more. The only exception is here cos I know you all are parrot lovers (I have the same thing on another forum related to my another hobby).

And now I dunno... yesterday I failed my English exam and I'm not sure what is the reason - my English is too weak or maybe I am too closed (or both) - there were many personal questions such as "Do you like animals?", "Do you have pets?", "Why do you have parrots?", "Why do you love parrots?" (gee I don't know the answer even in Polish) ,"What do you study?", "How do you help to protect environmental?" I hate so many questions about me...
Ps. please don't say my English is good cos nobody of you heard it.

Aww I'm sorry

I'm kinda against the term "Asperger's syndrome" and that's why I refer to myself as simple being autistic or having ASD(autism spectrum disorder), but if people wanna use "Asperger's syndrome" then it's fine.


There's this one creator on yt(Dhar Mann, you've probably heard of him) and he made autism videos spreading the message "Autism isn't a disability, it's just a different ability". That is so, SO problematic and stereotypical. Have you seen my friend's brother? Yup, he has ASD and he can barely communicate with others, and he easily has autism meltdowns. I even remember not being able to visit her some days because her brother was having meltdowns.

My mom's friend's son is autistic and he also has a hard time. He will stutter when speaking to people because of the fact that he is nervous and he's always stimming when we're at his house(He goes "hmmmm" kinda at the back of his throat)

Many autistic people require occupational therapy, speech therapy, etc, and many(including me) have SPD.

So no, autism can be a disability.

 

[BirdyBee]

I can relate, but with emotion. I can't cry, be angry, anything without internally cringing and trying to supress the emotion. I've tried working on it, but I just can't. It makes me feel horrible.

I'm sorry. I hope it'll get better

 

[StormyPica]

Aww I'm sorry

I'm kinda against the term "Asperger's syndrome" and that's why I refer to myself as simple being autistic or having ASD(autism spectrum disorder), but if people wanna use "Asperger's syndrome" then it's fine.


There's this one creator on yt(Dhar Mann, you've probably heard of him) and he made autism videos spreading the message "Autism isn't a disability, it's just a different ability". That is so, SO problematic and stereotypical. Have you seen my friend's brother? Yup, he has ASD and he can barely communicate with others, and he easily has autism meltdowns. I even remember not being able to visit her some days because her brother was having meltdowns.

My mom's friend's son is autistic and he also has a hard time. He will stutter when speaking to people because of the fact that he is nervous and he's always stimming when we're at his house(He goes "hmmmm" kinda at the back of his throat)

Many autistic people require occupational therapy, speech therapy, etc, and many(including me) have SPD.

So no, autism can be a disability.

Yeah, some people say my tics, SPD and trauma responses (some stuff happened) are just 'quirks', or something I can shut off at any time. It really hurts me, because I get multiple people then telling me that I should 'stop looking for attention'.

I can't turn off tics, SPD or any trauma related things, so it's harmful when people dismiss them as a 'different ability'. I don't want to do any of that stuff.

 

[foxgloveparrot]

Yeah, some people say my tics, SPD and trauma responses (some stuff happened) are just 'quirks', or something I can shut off at any time. It really hurts me, because I get multiple people then telling me that I should 'stop looking for attention'.

I can't turn off tics, SPD or any trauma related things, so it's harmful when people dismiss them as a 'different ability'. I don't want to do any of that stuff.

Same here, I can't just "stop" picking up the energy and emotions of others. There's no "shield" I can just "activate" and make it all go away.

 

[StormyPica]

Same here, I can't just "stop" picking up the energy and emotions of others. There's no "shield" I can just "activate" and make it all go away.

I do that too, the minute I see any change of emotion, even just a slight moment of worry in others, I desprately try to make them happier, happy 24/7, and if I can't I'm worthless.

 

[foxgloveparrot]

I do that too, the minute I see any change of emotion, even just a slight moment of worry in others, I desprately try to make them happier, happy 24/7, and if I can't I'm worthless.

I do that too, I always want others to be happy. But being an empath is more like being a mind reader in a way and I can't be in large groups of people anymore because EVERY. SINGLE. EMOTION is flooding into my brain and I can't shut them out, no matter how hard I try.
And being on my own is much much better.

 

[StormyPica]

I do that too, I always want others to be happy. But being an empath is more like being a mind reader in a way and I can't be in large groups of people anymore because EVERY. SINGLE. EMOTION is flooding into my brain and I can't shut them out, no matter how hard I try.
And being on my own is much much better.

I just try to 'fix' my friends. My parents are very cold towrds me and don't spend any time with my sister and I apart from maybe a card game every 2 months.

 

[foxgloveparrot]

I just try to 'fix' my friends. My parents are very cold towrds me and don't spend any time with my sister and I apart from maybe a card game every 2 months.

Yeah. I don't try to 'fix' people...I mean I do, I care about them, but not the way you describe it. My mind just lets other peoples' emotions in, all of them, even the ones they can barely feel themselves.

 

[StormyPica]

Yeah. I don't try to 'fix' people...I mean I do, I care about them, but not the way you describe it. My mind just lets other peoples' emotions in, all of them, even the ones they can barely feel themselves.

Well, it's like I said before, trying to get everyone constantly happy. It's a trauma response (stuff that happened when I was little), so I can't really shut it off, and it's not like anyone's gonna bring me to threapy to fix it or anything. It sucks, and is so emotionally exhuasting.

So I understand how you feel

 

[Rozalka]

Aww I'm sorry

I'm kinda against the term "Asperger's syndrome" and that's why I refer to myself as simple being autistic or having ASD(autism spectrum disorder), but if people wanna use "Asperger's syndrome" then it's fine.

Personally I have a different opinion - I prefer saying Asperger's Syndrome because "autistic" sounds like a much bigger problem. I knew one person irl with autism, he wasn't able even to talk - probably because "autistic" and "autism" sounds very similar I have such weird feelings - I know "autistic" is much wider than "autism", but I don't wanna make people confused. (note: I'm not against saying "autistic" because it is correct too) However there are different "types" of autism too - once time (on another forum) I was shocked that the person with who I was writing has autism cos I really thought such people don't talk Sure, now I know it wasn't a single case - last year I read some fanfiction stories written by such person, now I see even Stormy may have it.

I hope nobody feels resentful - I just don't wanna confuse people who have poor knowledge about autistic - I know, I wasn't the only one who was shocked that we had a person with autism on the forum. I know it is very wide subject

 

[foxgloveparrot]

Well, it's like I said before, trying to get everyone constantly happy. It's a trauma response (stuff that happened when I was little), so I can't really shut it off, and it's not like anyone's gonna bring me to threapy to fix it or anything. It sucks, and is so emotionally exhuasting.

So I understand how you feel

You probably understand - being an empath/highly sensitive person is emotionally draining as hell and there isn't really a way of coping. Everything just is.

 

[StormyPica]

You probably understand - being an empath/highly sensitive person is emotionally draining as hell and there isn't really a way of coping. Everything just is.

Yup, you're just vibing and internally dying

 

[foxgloveparrot]

Yup, you're just vibing and internally dying

And like, people think you're a bad person for never wanting to go to shows and stuff because there's too many people = too many emotions = too much wanting to die

 

[StormyPica]

Personally I have a different opinion - I prefer saying Asperger's Syndrome because "autistic" sounds like a much bigger problem. I knew one person irl with autism, he wasn't able even to talk - probably because "autistic" and "autism" sounds very similar I have such weird feelings - I know "autistic" is much wider than "autism", but I don't wanna make people confused. (note: I'm not against saying "autistic" because it is correct too) However there are different "types" of autism too - once time (on another forum) I was shocked that the person with who I was writing has autism cos I really thought such people don't talk Sure, now I know it wasn't a single case - last year I read some fanfiction stories written by such person, now I see even Stormy may have it.

I hope nobody feels resentful - I just don't wanna confuse people who have poor knowledge about autistic - I know, I wasn't the only one who was shocked that we had a person with autism on the forum. I know it is very wide subject

'Autism' and 'autistic' are the same thing. Autism is the disorder, and autistic describes someone who has it. Aspergers is autism, just a 'milder' version.

 

[StormyPica]

And like, people think you're a bad person for never wanting to go to shows and stuff because there's too many people = too many emotions = too much wanting to die

too many birbs = ANGY = seeb tantrum

 

[BirdyBee]

Personally I have a different opinion - I prefer saying Asperger's Syndrome because "autistic" sounds like a much bigger problem. I knew one person irl with autism, he wasn't able even to talk - probably because "autistic" and "autism" sounds very similar I have such weird feelings - I know "autistic" is much wider than "autism", but I don't wanna make people confused. (note: I'm not against saying "autistic" because it is correct too) However there are different "types" of autism too - once time (on another forum) I was shocked that the person with who I was writing has autism cos I really thought such people don't talk Sure, now I know it wasn't a single case - last year I read some fanfiction stories written by such person, now I see even Stormy may have it.

I hope nobody feels resentful - I just don't wanna confuse people who have poor knowledge about autistic - I know, I wasn't the only one who was shocked that we had a person with autism on the forum. I know it is very wide subject

Sure, that's fine.

The reason I'm against it is because the term "Asperger's syndrome" was "invented" by Hans Asperger, and he was a Nazi. If that wasn't bad enough, he would take disabled children, do tests on them, and then they would be killed. He labeled some autistic people as "high functioning"/having Asperger's.

"severely autistic"/"low functioning" children were deemed as less intelligent, unsocial, and undesirable, and were experimented on, starved, and murdered. He killed nearly 800 children.

I also don't like functioning labels since they are problematic and they where also made by Hans Asperger.

If you prefer Asperger's then it's fine, I won't hate you for it.

Cloe Hayden has a great video on this topic:

 

[StormyPica]

Sure, that's fine.

The reason I'm against it is because the term "Asperger's syndrome" was "invented" by Hans Asperger, and he was a Nazi. If that wasn't bad enough, he would take disabled children, do tests on them, and then they would be killed. He labeled some autistic people as "high functioning"/having Asperger's.

"severely autistic"/"low functioning" children were deemed as less intelligent, unsocial, and undesirable, and were experimented on, starved, and murdered. He killed nearly 800 children.

I also don't like functioning labels since they are problematic and they where also made by Hans Asperger.

If you prefer Asperger's then it's fine, I won't hate you for it.

Cloe Hayden has a great video on this topic:

Yup, and Roz seems to think 'Aspergers' is a seperate disorder, when it's really just part of the autism spectrum?

 

[Rozalka]

'Autism' and 'autistic' are the same thing. Autism is the disorder, and autistic describes someone who has it. Aspergers is autism, just a 'milder' version.

So, in the past I thought right... something confused me - later I thought autism spectrum is a general name for autism, Asperger's and something else.