My response exactly. You need to remember things you have said prior, such as "My parents are responsible for the bird's financially" and "I can only take them to the vet when my parents say it's OK, and they didn't". But I'll say it once again, if you don't have an income to pay for vet care for your birds that isn't your fault. What is your fault is the lying, the not realizing that your birds are in danger and cannot ever get help, yet you just want them so you'll keep them, and the whole "My birds calm me down when I'm feeling bad, they destress me at the end of the day, so I should have them" stuff. You don't realize what you sound like, which is a 16 year old kid that hasn't grown up yet. And again, that's OK if you're only responsible for yourself, but unfortunately you're in a situation where you're responsible for other living creatures, at least in some way. And you shouldn't be. That's the bottom line.
And I'd think twice before you start assuming you act like you know how other people feel about things, how no one could ever feel as badly as you, that you've been through things that we could never understand, etc. That's a dangerous area to get into and has absolutely nothing to do with the fact that you cannot be responsible for your own pets right now. You seem to have no sense of empathy for others at all, which is a separate problem from not being able to take care of your birds or to keep them out of danger, but then again it's not, because you aren't able to feel badly for your birds either. You loving them and playing with them and wanting what is best for them was never in doubt, but you can't pay for vet care with love. That's a hard fact to learn in life, that just because you love a pet or even a child, that doesn't mean you are able to take care of them or should have them in the first place.
Trust me, whether you think anyone can feel as badly as you do about having to rehome your pets or not, you're very, very wrong. About 2 years ago at the age of 35 I was diagnosed with cervical cancer and had to stop working. I had to have 3 major surgeries over the span of a year, ran through about $60,000 of savings paying bills and for medical stuff, prescriptions, copays, deductibles, I just bled money. And worst of all I had 2 dogs and multiple birds that I could hardly get up to feed. If not for my mom who had just retired and who lives 10 minutes away from me, I would have had to rehome all of my pets. And I started calling people I knew who loved animals and who had bird experience. I had already secured a place with a woman I work with for my pug of 14 years to go, and my new cattle dog puppy who I had only had for a few months before suddenly being diagnosed, she was going to my cousin. Rehoming my birds was heartbreaking because they would most likely have gone to people I didn't know, who I couldn't visit, and who I would not get them back from IF I recovered. I actually did say to myself "They make me feel so much better, they're my family, I should not have to rehome my family because I've gotten sick by no fault of my own". But I made arrangements anyway because I couldn't walk my dogs, I couldn't clean my bird's cages out, I was sleeping all the time, and I had run out of money so if they had needed a vet I would have had to borrow it from someone. I could no longer be responsible for my pets. Whether it was my fault or not wasn't the point, the point was that regardless of whether it was my fault, regardless of how much it hurt me, killed me actually, it just wasn't fair to them. It broke my heart and I seriously did not care if I died at that point, my life was ripped apart by something that I didn't cause and I had nothing to do with. The only things I had that couldn't be taken away from me were my guitar, my saxophone, and my music...And I say this after selling 6 guitars from my collection to pay my bills so I didn't lose my house...I still miss that 1966 Harmony Bobkat H-15, man, the next extra $600 I come across I'm going straight on eBay and buying another one to restore! God I loved that guitar! And my 1974 Univox HiFlier Phase 3 in natural finish. It was mint. They're all gone. But I have a roof over my head, I still have a nice car to drive, and I managed to keep my professional model Yamagisawa Alto Sax, my 1996 Kurt Cobain Signature Fender Jaguar, and my 2003 Gibson Les Paul Special in TV Yellow...And my music, they couldn't take that away. But losing my family, that thought shattered me. I spent many days and nights vomiting, maybe from the treatments or the medication, maybe because I knew that I was soon going to have to give my family up to homes that could care for them properly, who could pay for vet care, who could walk the dogs every day and clean out the bird cages weekly. I just couldn't do it, no matter how hard I tried. And I lived completely alone except for my pets, so I was going to be alone, by myself, with this disease...If not for my mom being willing to move into my house temporarily to take care of my pets and she and my step-father being willing to pay my bills for a while, well I would have lost them all. I prepared to lose them all, I made plans.
So don't you dare tell the members of this forum that we don't understand what you're going through, or that the pain you're experiencing about finally having to face the reality of your situation is like our pain times one hundred. I could have easily said the same to you, but I didn't because this isn't a competition. My pain was every bit as real and as strong as yours, I promise. The difference is that you are 16 and I was 35, and I wanted what was best for the family that I cared about, rather than wanting what was best for me.
"Dance like nobody's watching..."
