Wing trouble

[Minimaker]

Yeah we just introduced Sailor to the harness this morning. She was not impressed, so we left it inside her enclosure so she could mess around with it. We're finally getting somewhere with her. She's stepping up on the guys without biting at them so much. I've come to realize she simply likes men more. My son and husband can walk right up to her and her behavior and body language is fine, comfortable, etc. They can play with her, get her to step up. Matter of fact a male friend of my son's came over yesterday and picked her right up and she had never seen him before. No problem. If my daughter or I approach her she freaks out and gets really nippy and bluff lunges at us. I hope that changes someday. I wanted this bird more than anyone and she doesn't like me right now

Is it often true that parrots will bond with the opposite sex if they have a choice?

 

[Taw5106]

I have found so far that's not true. Venus is a female and she has bonded with me. She wanted to come to me last night and I wanted a shower so I took her in the shower with me and put her on the shower perch. She isn't under the water but can move under it. She didn't. Finished my shower and she came along and cuddled with me while I was reading and watching TV. This morning she came to me and I needed to go in the kitchen so I went to hand her off to Husband. He offered his hand, said step up 10 times and she just leaned her chest against his hand refusing to step up. So I put her on top of her cage. She has started calling for me when I'm not in sight too so I have a female bonded to me. Buddy my GCA is male and he's bonded to me like Velcro super glue lol.

 

[Minimaker]

Huh. I wondered because I had seen others talk about that before online. And this particular parrot definitely prefers males to females in this house. Any guy can walk up to her and mess with her. My 13 year old daughter who's the smallest of us, quiet, kind, etc. can't get anywhere near her without Sailor having a meltdown. She literally screams in her big mac voice if my daughter gets too near her even with a nut in her hand. It's so weird! She'll approach with treats and usually that's a hit no matter who you are. But my daughter has such trouble getting near her-it makes no sense why out of everyone she's decided to be afraid of her the most. And me I get the lunge and nip bluff when I try to get my hand near her. I'm not backing down anymore and that doesn't help either. I thought maybe she was sensing fear in me so I stopped letting her run me off.

 

[Taw5106]

Was Sailor around children before or is this her first time around a little one? Was she around children or had a bad experience with a child or young teen? You may not know of Sailor's history but maybe it's something in the past. Buddy gets nervous when our smaller nieces are around but one niece tries to touch Buddy, even runs at his cage so she isn't permitted to come over. Even if the little ones try to give him a treat, no it's not a worthy treat for him. His previous owner didn't have small children around. Venus is ok with kids but I have to control the kids from mobbing her. As long as they listen to me and do as I say Venus is fine, will even step up for them. Buddy doesn't like men, period. Husband can walk by Buddy's cage, not say a word, not do anything towards Buddy, even not acknowledge Buddy and you hear BAM! Buddy is hitting the cage biting the bars. I can walk up to the cage and Buddy crushes head against the bars waiting for a scratch.

I would love to know what it is that makes a bird decide who it loves.

 

[Minimaker]

Not sure, she came from a big pet store in Delaware and she was shipped to us. They were less than forthcoming when we called with any questions. They seemed too busy and like they wanted off the phone quick when we called and asked them for information about her or her history. They actually gave us some wrong information when we were talking to them before purchase, because it was different than what was on her hatch certificate when she arrived. No idea where she was in the store or what happened to her. I know she acts very phobic of so many things and changes push her over the edge to the point of huddling and trembling like an earthquake for awhile. Even a new toy added to her enclosure sometimes throws her in a tizzy for the whole day and she'll perch somewhere and not hardly move until evening. No kidding. We put tall pvc pipe stands with bowls on top right up beside her where she hangs out or else she wouldn't move to go eat when we first got her because she didn't want to go lower to where the bolt-on bowls were on the side of the enclosure. We're working with her, but she's so afraid of every little thing, poor baby. I have no idea what the deal is. I hope she comes out of this at some point when she realizes she's safe and not being shipped off anywhere else. Someone who owns parrots that we know suggested to us that we should send her back for a refund and get a new one that we could touch and interact with. I told my husband no way, she is our bird and we'll fix this. We have nothing but time and I can be patient. She's coming along, I can pick her up now as long as I use a stick at first and then get her on my arm from there. She just really prefers men and it shows. Her eyes and body language/behavior is so much more gentle with men than with women. Maybe she'll get used to me and my daughter Adrianna in time. I hope so, but either way she's staying. On the up side she seems to love my son Drake the most who we already decided will inherit Sailor someday (much to his delight). She looks at him like he's the living end. Steps right up on his arm out of the enclosure and takes anything he gives her without the slightest hint of aggression. Anything from me or Adrianna? Yeah, not so much

 

[Anansi]

The kind of love, persistence and commitment that you're showing is exactly what's needed to get through to Sailor one day, Minimaker.

 

[weco]

Her wings look very much more clipped than Sailor's are. That looks more like my conure's wings that were clipped properly. He can't fly at all, sort of just flutters to the ground. I doubt your bird will be able to get far.

Like Mike said, Sailor's looks like a show clip, a clip that might slow a big bird down, but only slightly.....

Show clips can leave those two or three exposed feathers unprotected and subject to potential breakage.....since he's successfully done this maneuver, you might want to think about having him clipped further, until his next molt, if only to protect him from possible further danger...you might want to discuss the possibility with your vet.....

I'm thinking that since he was able to do it this time, his confidence has probably been boosted to where he might try this again.....are your door openings wide enough to safely allow GWs to fly around ? ? ?

Good luck on your decision pondering ! ! !

 

[weco]

Huh. I wondered because I had seen others talk about that before online. And this particular parrot definitely prefers males to females in this house. Any guy can walk up to her and mess with her. My 13 year old daughter who's the smallest of us, quiet, kind, etc. can't get anywhere near her without Sailor having a meltdown. She literally screams in her big mac voice if my daughter gets too near her even with a nut in her hand. It's so weird! She'll approach with treats and usually that's a hit no matter who you are. But my daughter has such trouble getting near her-it makes no sense why out of everyone she's decided to be afraid of her the most. And me I get the lunge and nip bluff when I try to get my hand near her. I'm not backing down anymore and that doesn't help either. I thought maybe she was sensing fear in me so I stopped letting her run me off.

I don't know about gender preference, but since you mentioned your daughter's age and given you avatar, do either of you go in for unique doos, wild nail polish, lip glosses or clothes ? ? ? The reason I asked is because the oldest granddaughter of my birdsitter and a couple of her friends dyed their hair rainbow colored with some of that temp, wash out dye & when they came by the house to tell her they were leaving, my birds had a fit & went after the girls.....this girl could handle any of my birds until that afternoon/evening, then when she changed her hair back to her normal color, the birds were fine.....just a thought ! ! !

 

[JerseyWendy]

....
Is it often true that parrots will bond with the opposite sex if they have a choice?

IME, no. All of my fids (3 males, 1 female) go to anyone in the immediate family, and some even go to complete strangers of both sexes.

.....
I would love to know what it is that makes a bird decide who it loves.

I think early socialization plays an important role in a bird's confidence. Ripley (our GW) only came to live with us when he was 18 months old (he was raised in a huge bird store). Even though I could handle him from day 1, the rest of the family was quite intimidated by his beak, and I swear, Ripley knew how they felt - and tried taking advantage on many occasions. He never maliciously 'chomped' down on anyone, but all he would have to do is open his beak while perched on someone, and either my husband's or sons' color would leave their faces. Now that they are confident with him / around him, Ripley acts totally different. He's calmer, more relaxed, and MUCH sweeter around them.

 

[thekarens]

My experience is the same as Wendy. Got Zoe at 14 months. She was raised in the shop and had one other home before us. We were told she preferred men, but you can see that's never been an issue here. I also have a female sennie that loves me.

On the other hand our son is afraid of her and she knows it. She will do the big beak routine and lunge if he comes anywhere near her.

 

[Minimaker]

We were afraid of her at first but it's over now. Our vet showed us how to handle her easily and that was a big confidence booster. Neither one of us show any fear with her now. My daughter picks her up and she eye pins wildly and hollers "Hi!" which is her fear response word. She's only ever screamed full blast over my daughter being near her, much to our surprise. We had never heard her do that before. No one here has fancy anything, we live in the country in Illinois, right in the middle of fields and cows Not a conducive environment for finery I assure you, hehe. She just prefers men, but that's ok. I may not be her bestie but I can still end up being able to handle her ok without her bluffing/threatening all the time. It will just take more time and work to get there. It was my son more than anyone who was afraid of the beak and still she loves him and went to him first without hesitation. He was most definitely afraid of getting bit and was very nervous around her for quite awhile. As soon as he got brave enough to hold out an arm she climbed right on. Me and Adrianna tried much sooner and she always lunges at us and retreats to a back corner. Go figure, I don't know. Maybe a female scared her at the pet store or something.

 

[RavensGryf]

So good to hear it after the rough beginning! You're all (including Sailor) making good progress! Unfortunately birds (not unlike us) form an opinion who they like better. MY bird Raven lets hubby pick him up and while he doesn't like petting, he'll even tolerate it from him, where I can't even step him up without a small treat.

 

[Minimaker]

It is so hard to not grab her up and cuddle her! Waiting is so frustrating sometimes-look at that goof loving on her baby rattle instead of me! She'll sit there stroking her own head slowly while she does it, silly girl.

 

[Anansi]

Sailor is quite the multitasker, eh? Hahaha! Such a beautiful bird.

Out of curiosity, what is it that your vet told you that made such a difference in your and your daughter's ability to handle her?

 

[Minimaker]

It was more what she did really. She opened the door and stuck her arm right in front of that big bitey beak and she stepped up without going into attack mode like she did with us. Sailor reached down to bite her and she shook her arm and unseated her footing which stopped the bite. I commented on how easily she handled her and she told me not to be afraid of her and just go for it. She said if you get bit, trust me you're going to live through it. The bluffing/lunging/biting had always intimidated us. After we saw her grab her up like it was nothing it strengthened our resolve to not let her push our fear buttons. Mark (Birdman) had told us these things, but really seeing it in action helped us be more brave. I wish I had taken video of the bluff show she put on when we tried to get near her. She was like a cornered tiger slashing and gnashing her beak. Seriously aggressive stuff, ten lunging bites in a row if that's what it took to make us go away. Even now she pulls that with me when I change out her food and water in the bowls. She jumps at my hands. Now I ball them up and push my knuckle back at her beak instead of retreating which makes her back away. Once we get her out of her enclosure she's much better. But inside it...oh boy. She knows we're trying to get her out of it and that does not make her happy at all.

 

[Taw5106]

Venus, our new Ekkie bluffs a lot. Keep going it looks like you are making progress. Mark, Birdman, talked about taking two fingers and pushing beaks back, this has worked volumes with Venus. She has stopped lunging but she cracks me up because she changed tactics, now she gently grabs my finger and moves it away from her. If she is inside her cage, on her sleep perch, she's solid about go away when she is tired at bed time. I let her be at this time. Keep working with your baby, I believe she will come around.

 

[MikeyTN]

Some birds can be sexiest like my Lola, she prefers men!

I have a brother in law and a sister in law living in Illinois and they live out in the country side as well in the middle of no where.

 

[Minimaker]

Some birds can be sexiest like my Lola, she prefers men!

I have a brother in law and a sister in law living in Illinois and they live out in the country side as well in the middle of no where.

Sounds familiar Mike. It's far from stimulating, I assure you I'd rather be on some coast enjoying the ocean but I have family here I wanted my children to grow up around. They had wonderful deep relationships here so I'm not sorry. But it sure would be nice to be somewhere a little more fun sometimes!

Ah well I have parrots. If you can't go to paradise, might as well bring a little paradise home to you... &

Your Lola is gorgeous by the way, I really want one of those someday. Blue and golds are so pretty too.

 

[MikeyTN]

They have family throughout the area so they're not moving either. I used to live out in the country side, no neighbors but annoying cows moo all night long behind the house that kept me awake. During that time I had my animals keep me company as well.