Why I despise Facebook bird groups

[Rico_Tiel]

So, yesterday I asked about pretty bird pellets here and on Facebook and oh god the responses were a mess.

People saying seed diets are the best, people saying only veggies are good, people saying that only Harrison’s is good (despite explicitly saying I can’t afford it because of the cost and the poor value (16$ for 1LBS? Not a chance.) and it was all the same. Then, people started assuming that I was an idiot.

I got annoyed but gave the same response since no one was answering my legitimate question. Then people became very angry over assumptions they read made by other people and then it became incredibly mind numbingly stupid.

I remained relatively polite though, despite people insinuating that I don’t deserve Rico over me asking about pellets and not being able to afford chop (I even showed the math of a few veggies and their cost, along with seeds, and pellets which came out to 135$ a month) because I live in Alaska which I EXPLICITLY stated.

Then, someone said that I thought he was a toy? Someone else assumed I didn’t know a lick about parrot care and gave me the whole proper care spiel. Someone else said if I can’t afford food then the vet bills will take me out (I explained that we literally cannot afford 135$ on top of 140+ dollars just to keep us, the humans, from going hungry in the week and it costs 57$ every 3 weeks for the dog food and 15$ a week for cat food) but people still treated me like I was below them and had a room temperature IQ. It’s so annoying and it sucks. If it were anyone else asking for help/advice, they would have driven them away and harmed a bird in the long run. It’s just as bad as Reddit.

I almost guarantee you see the issue here, but if you don’t, let me explain it. Instead of being helpful and understanding, they made assumptions and insinuations about me that obviously aren’t even true, they acted like they were above me for asking about pellets that they either didn’t like, they thought was bad, or it wasn’t 100% all veggies, and they were just condescending and rude.


something I have noticed is, people are really mean in animal groups. especially bird groups. I just don’t get it. It takes nothing to be kind and understanding but it also takes nothing to be judgy and unkind. When someone is hateful and aggressive, it makes people not learn. It makes them angry and it makes them feel bad and they end up doing the wrong things because they were attacked when they reached out for help. and they literally ignore bad posts (I literally JUST saw a dude chasing around scaring his tiels, budgies, and conure with a dowel while laughing and saying “fly!”) and go after the really mundane posts. It’s nucking futs and it’s so stupidly annoying. I honestly hope the animal groups get better instead of being a literal circus.


Anyway, this was a bit of a rant and why I will probably just leave Facebook since it’s got nothing to offer and they insist on being toxic girlie pops


So, what have I learned from that experience?

Gatekeep, gaslight, girlboss

 

[zERo]

So, yesterday I asked about pretty bird pellets here and on Facebook and oh god the responses were a mess.

People saying seed diets are the best, people saying only veggies are good, people saying that only Harrison’s is good (despite explicitly saying I can’t afford it because of the cost and the poor value (16$ for 1LBS? Not a chance.) and it was all the same. Then, people started assuming that I was an idiot.

I got annoyed but gave the same response since no one was answering my legitimate question. Then people became very angry over assumptions they read made by other people and then it became incredibly mind numbingly stupid.

I remained relatively polite though, despite people insinuating that I don’t deserve Rico over me asking about pellets and not being able to afford chop (I even showed the math of a few veggies and their cost, along with seeds, and pellets which came out to 135$ a month) because I live in Alaska which I EXPLICITLY stated.

Then, someone said that I thought he was a toy? Someone else assumed I didn’t know a lick about parrot care and gave me the whole proper care spiel. Someone else said if I can’t afford food then the vet bills will take me out (I explained that we literally cannot afford 135$ on top of 140+ dollars just to keep us, the humans, from going hungry in the week and it costs 57$ every 3 weeks for the dog food and 15$ a week for cat food) but people still treated me like I was below them and had a room temperature IQ. It’s so annoying and it sucks. If it were anyone else asking for help/advice, they would have driven them away and harmed a bird in the long run. It’s just as bad as Reddit.

I almost guarantee you see the issue here, but if you don’t, let me explain it. Instead of being helpful and understanding, they made assumptions and insinuations about me that obviously aren’t even true, they acted like they were above me for asking about pellets that they either didn’t like, they thought was bad, or it wasn’t 100% all veggies, and they were just condescending and rude.


something I have noticed is, people are really mean in animal groups. especially bird groups. I just don’t get it. It takes nothing to be kind and understanding but it also takes nothing to be judgy and unkind. When someone is hateful and aggressive, it makes people not learn. It makes them angry and it makes them feel bad and they end up doing the wrong things because they were attacked when they reached out for help. and they literally ignore bad posts (I literally JUST saw a dude chasing around scaring his tiels, budgies, and conure with a dowel while laughing and saying “fly!”) and go after the really mundane posts. It’s nucking futs and it’s so stupidly annoying. I honestly hope the animal groups get better instead of being a literal circus.


Anyway, this was a bit of a rant and why I will probably just leave Facebook since it’s got nothing to offer and they insist on being toxic girlie pops


So, what have I learned from that experience?

Gatekeep, gaslight, girlboss

All I can say is, stay far far away from Facebook for advice, especially in animal care. Saves you from the stress

 

[Rico_Tiel]

All I can say is, stay far far away from Facebook for advice, especially in animal care. Saves you from the stress

Yup. Lesson learned lmao

 

[Keet_Krazy]

Exactly the reason there is only one online place I go to for opinions on parrot care and advice. The majority of online groups (This does not include PF btw) are just plain toxic.
I am actually apart of a Poultry forum and currently refuse to ask questions about diet/nutrition, cause that is a heavily debated topic among that community. It bugs me cause it is something I genuinely want to learn about but I refuse to put myself in that position or start that debate yet again.

(Back to Parrots).
I wish people would stop trying to put diet as a "one size fits all". We are dealing with undomesticated wild animals ranging through a couple hundred *species*! That knowledge, research, and evidence is simple not out there to say "this is the only correct way!"
That's the condensed version of my feelings

 

[Rico_Tiel]

Exactly the reason there is only one online place I go to for opinions on parrot care and advice. The majority of online groups (This does not include PF btw) are just plain toxic.
I am actually apart of a Poultry forum and currently refuse to ask questions about diet/nutrition, cause that is a heavily debated topic among that community. It bugs me cause it is something I genuinely want to learn about but I refuse to put myself in that position or start that debate yet again.

(Back to Parrots).
I wish people would stop trying to put diet as a "one size fits all". We are dealing with undomesticated wild animals ranging through a couple hundred *species*! That knowledge, research, and evidence is simple not out there to say "this is the only correct way!"
That's the condensed version of my feelings

Exactly!!! PF seems to be the ONLY civil place to discuss parrots rather than just “I’m right and you’re wrong you idiot. You don’t deserve a bird because of xyz and these assumptions I made about you are true. So now you must accept that you are wrong.” There’s no guaranteed 1 size fits all for parrots. There are different diets for them! Some species, like cockatiels do eat more seeds and plants while others eat more fruits like ekkies do. African parrots such as lovebirds don’t have the same diet as conures, like cockatoos have different diets than asiatic parakeets like alexandrines. FB, Reddit, whatever the heck are all stinky and PF seems to be the only good place that’s civil.

 

[ImaParrot]

So, yesterday I asked about pretty bird pellets here and on Facebook and oh god the responses were a mess.

People saying seed diets are the best, people saying only veggies are good, people saying that only Harrison’s is good (despite explicitly saying I can’t afford it because of the cost and the poor value (16$ for 1LBS? Not a chance.) and it was all the same. Then, people started assuming that I was an idiot.

I got annoyed but gave the same response since no one was answering my legitimate question. Then people became very angry over assumptions they read made by other people and then it became incredibly mind numbingly stupid.

I remained relatively polite though, despite people insinuating that I don’t deserve Rico over me asking about pellets and not being able to afford chop (I even showed the math of a few veggies and their cost, along with seeds, and pellets which came out to 135$ a month) because I live in Alaska which I EXPLICITLY stated.

Then, someone said that I thought he was a toy? Someone else assumed I didn’t know a lick about parrot care and gave me the whole proper care spiel. Someone else said if I can’t afford food then the vet bills will take me out (I explained that we literally cannot afford 135$ on top of 140+ dollars just to keep us, the humans, from going hungry in the week and it costs 57$ every 3 weeks for the dog food and 15$ a week for cat food) but people still treated me like I was below them and had a room temperature IQ. It’s so annoying and it sucks. If it were anyone else asking for help/advice, they would have driven them away and harmed a bird in the long run. It’s just as bad as Reddit.

I almost guarantee you see the issue here, but if you don’t, let me explain it. Instead of being helpful and understanding, they made assumptions and insinuations about me that obviously aren’t even true, they acted like they were above me for asking about pellets that they either didn’t like, they thought was bad, or it wasn’t 100% all veggies, and they were just condescending and rude.


something I have noticed is, people are really mean in animal groups. especially bird groups. I just don’t get it. It takes nothing to be kind and understanding but it also takes nothing to be judgy and unkind. When someone is hateful and aggressive, it makes people not learn. It makes them angry and it makes them feel bad and they end up doing the wrong things because they were attacked when they reached out for help. and they literally ignore bad posts (I literally JUST saw a dude chasing around scaring his tiels, budgies, and conure with a dowel while laughing and saying “fly!”) and go after the really mundane posts. It’s nucking futs and it’s so stupidly annoying. I honestly hope the animal groups get better instead of being a literal circus.


Anyway, this was a bit of a rant and why I will probably just leave Facebook since it’s got nothing to offer and they insist on being toxic girlie pops


So, what have I learned from that experience?

Gatekeep, gaslight, girlboss

I left Facebook a VERY long time ago. I haven't been on Parrot Forums that long, but glad to know it's not like that at all.

 

[SailBoat]

I will admit that your opening statements was a put-off to me as even though you were Venting, it is hard to compare your statements as to what others may have stated.

Alaska is a unique place as near everything that is not manufactured or grown there requires expensive shipping costs. Most people do not understand that reality until they are faced with it.

It is important to remember that Parrot diet requirements should be based on what was their Natural Range and specifically what is available 'there.' As a result, New World Parrots should have a different diet base than Old World Parrot and just to add a bit of confusion Australia Parrots should have their own!

The serious issue is that most Bird Seed diets are little more than the cheapest bird seed provided for 'wild birds' that live outside in the Snow Belts. This cheap mix rarely has more than Sunflower seed and corn with bits of other leftover product shoveled into the mixing bin.

High-quality, custom Seed Diets are available, but the average owner is either to cheap, not interested in or not informed of the differences and as a result what most Parrots are feed is barely suitable.

With that as a base: Vets will commonly recommend Pellets in the desperate hope the Parrot will get some from time to time.

Pellets:
Regardless of where in this World the Pellet is manufactured, it is important that it is produced in a Human Grade certified facility as the cleanliness and ingredients control is much higher. Sadly, manufactured in China still remains problematic as controls still are sub-standard.

The process of producing Pellets require that the mixture be sterilized (cooked at high temperature) to assure shelf life (limit spoilage). As a result, the food contain is very low. What separates one Pellet from another is what chemicals they add to the mix prior to forming, but after heating. What you are left to compare is the added Vitamins and minerals.

Things to avoid are: Added colouration, sugar (remember there are several terms for sugar) and salt.


So what is the foundations of a healthy diet remains natural, fresh foods, Fresh Veggies, a wide base of seeds, tree based nuts and grains with pellets added as a supplement based on recent blood tests.

 

[DonnaBudgie]

So, yesterday I asked about pretty bird pellets here and on Facebook and oh god the responses were a mess.

People saying seed diets are the best, people saying only veggies are good, people saying that only Harrison’s is good (despite explicitly saying I can’t afford it because of the cost and the poor value (16$ for 1LBS? Not a chance.) and it was all the same. Then, people started assuming that I was an idiot.

I got annoyed but gave the same response since no one was answering my legitimate question. Then people became very angry over assumptions they read made by other people and then it became incredibly mind numbingly stupid.

I remained relatively polite though, despite people insinuating that I don’t deserve Rico over me asking about pellets and not being able to afford chop (I even showed the math of a few veggies and their cost, along with seeds, and pellets which came out to 135$ a month) because I live in Alaska which I EXPLICITLY stated.

Then, someone said that I thought he was a toy? Someone else assumed I didn’t know a lick about parrot care and gave me the whole proper care spiel. Someone else said if I can’t afford food then the vet bills will take me out (I explained that we literally cannot afford 135$ on top of 140+ dollars just to keep us, the humans, from going hungry in the week and it costs 57$ every 3 weeks for the dog food and 15$ a week for cat food) but people still treated me like I was below them and had a room temperature IQ. It’s so annoying and it sucks. If it were anyone else asking for help/advice, they would have driven them away and harmed a bird in the long run. It’s just as bad as Reddit.

I almost guarantee you see the issue here, but if you don’t, let me explain it. Instead of being helpful and understanding, they made assumptions and insinuations about me that obviously aren’t even true, they acted like they were above me for asking about pellets that they either didn’t like, they thought was bad, or it wasn’t 100% all veggies, and they were just condescending and rude.


something I have noticed is, people are really mean in animal groups. especially bird groups. I just don’t get it. It takes nothing to be kind and understanding but it also takes nothing to be judgy and unkind. When someone is hateful and aggressive, it makes people not learn. It makes them angry and it makes them feel bad and they end up doing the wrong things because they were attacked when they reached out for help. and they literally ignore bad posts (I literally JUST saw a dude chasing around scaring his tiels, budgies, and conure with a dowel while laughing and saying “fly!”) and go after the really mundane posts. It’s nucking futs and it’s so stupidly annoying. I honestly hope the animal groups get better instead of being a literal circus.


Anyway, this was a bit of a rant and why I will probably just leave Facebook since it’s got nothing to offer and they insist on being toxic girlie pops


So, what have I learned from that experience?

Gatekeep, gaslight, girlboss

That's why I call it Facecrap. I SO AGREE that many people on Facecrap are mind numbingly STUPID, and are rude, mean-spirited, attention seeking narcissists for thinking that anyone actually cares about their opinions. Facecrap has given every idiot a platform to spew their venom. And they have no filter- rude, aggressive, insulting behavior not tolerated in polite society is commonplace on the internet. For these reason I do not participate at all in Facecrap or any other social media and my life is full and happy. I am not so self-involved that I think complete strangers care what I think (I don't care what they think) or about what's going on in my life (I don't care about theirs). I also don't use it to update with friends and family. If they want to communicate with me they can call or text me. And nothing is sillier than "friending" strangers on Facecrap that you will never meet and counting them as your friends! They brag "I have 876 friends!" No, you don't, I say.
All that said, I love Parrotforum.com. It's totally different, with all the good of connecting with other parrot lovers but without all the BS on Facecrap, etc.
Just ignore them.

 

[Rico_Tiel]

I left Facebook a VERY long time ago. I haven't been on Parrot Forums that long, but glad to know it's not like that at all.

Yeah, I should just abandon that dookie hole honestly. It sucks! And I’ve been on it like 2 months. All it has done is make me mad and lower my IQ down to a single digit.

It’s like twitter and TikTok mixed together and became that thing. Everyone believes EVERYTHING (like on TikTok), bullying runs wild (like twitter and TikTok), there are literally some of the stupidest takes (in EVERY group like twitter) and the misinformation on that thing is INSANE (in all groups but ESPECIALLY pet groups)


the lack of moderation on those groups are NUTS! My post for example, was full of comments being just plain insulting and rude when having common courtesy is a rule there. Is it enforced? Nope! They allowed sexualization of a ‘tiel, they allowed someone to terrorize their 4 birds with a dowel, and posts about buying birds have been left up DESPITE it being against the rules.

So the lesson here?

Facebook sucks and is just a digital MMA ring for old people. Stay toxic girlie pops

 

[DonnaBudgie]

Yeah, I should just abandon that dookie hole honestly. It sucks! And I’ve been on it like 2 months. All it has done is make me mad and lower my IQ down to a single digit.

It’s like twitter and TikTok mixed together and became that thing. Everyone believes EVERYTHING (like on TikTok), bullying runs wild (like twitter and TikTok), there are literally some of the stupidest takes (in EVERY group like twitter) and the misinformation on that thing is INSANE (in all groups but ESPECIALLY pet groups)


the lack of moderation on those groups are NUTS! My post for example, was full of comments being just plain insulting and rude when having common courtesy is a rule there. Is it enforced? Nope! They allowed sexualization of a ‘tiel, they allowed someone to terrorize their 4 birds with a dowel, and posts about buying birds have been left up DESPITE it being against the rules.

So the lesson here?

Facebook sucks and is just a digital MMA ring for old people. Stay toxic girlie pops

What does "it's just a digital MMA ring for old people" mean?

 

[Rico_Tiel]

I will admit that your opening statements was a put-off to me as even though you were Venting, it is hard to compare your statements as to what others may have stated.

Alaska is a unique place as near everything that is not manufactured or grown there requires expensive shipping costs. Most people do not understand that reality until they are faced with it.

It is important to remember that Parrot diet requirements should be based on what was their Natural Range and specifically what is available 'there.' As a result, New World Parrots should have a different diet base than Old World Parrot and just to add a bit of confusion Australia Parrots should have their own!

The serious issue is that most Bird Seed diets are little more that the cheapest bird seed provided for 'wild birds' that life outside in the Snow Belts. This cheap mix rarely has more than Sunflower seed and corn with bits of other leftover product shoveled into the mixing bin.

High-quality, custom Seed Diets are available, but the average owner is either to cheap, not interested in or not informed of the differences and as a result what most Parrots are feed is barely suitable.

With that as a base: Vets will commonly recommend Pellets in the desperate hope the Parrot will get some from time to time.

Pellets:
Regardless of where in this World the Pellet is manufactured, it is important that it is produced in a Human Grade certified facility as the cleanliness and ingredients control is much higher. Sadly, manufactured in China still remains problematic as controls still are sub-standard.

The process of producing Pellets require that the mixture be sterilized (cooked at high temperature) to assure shelf life (limit spoilage). As a result, the food contain is very low. What separates one Pellet from another is what chemicals they add to the mix prior to forming, but after heating. What you are left to compare is the added Vitamins and minerals.

Things to avoid are: Added colouration, sugar (remember there are several terms for sugar) and salt.


So what is the foundations of a healthy diet remains natural, fresh foods, Fresh Veggies, a wide base of seeds, tree based nuts and grains with pellets added as a supplement based on recent blood tests.

This is brilliant! Thank you so much! I am absolutely gonna use this when looking for and buying pellets! Thank you!

 

[Rico_Tiel]

What does "it's just a digital MMA ring for old people" mean?

Just like a place for old people to fight each other digitally. Because that’s really what it is, old people squabbling and fighting and being total jerks to each other.

 

[DonnaBudgie]

Just like a place for old people to fight each other digitally. Because that’s really what it is, old people squabbling and fighting and being total jerks to each other.

Old people? Really. As an old person who has shown respect for people of all ages including young people I resent that comment.

 

[Rico_Tiel]

That's why I call it Facecrap. I SO AGREE that many people on Facecrap are mind numbingly STUPID, and are rude, mean-spirited, attention seeking narcissists for thinking that anyone actually cares about their opinions. Facecrap has given every idiot a platform to spew their venom. And they have no filter- rude, aggressive, insulting behavior not tolerated in polite society is commonplace on the internet. For these reason I do not participate at all in Facecrap or any other social media and my life is full and happy. I am not so self-involved that I think complete strangers care what I think (I don't care what they think) or about what's going on in my life (I don't care about theirs). I also don't use it to update with friends and family. If they want to communicate with me they can call or text me. And nothing is sillier than "friending" strangers on Facecrap that you will never meet and counting them as your friends! They brag "I have 876 friends!" No, you don't, I say.
All that said, I love Parrotforum.com. It's totally different, with all the good of connecting with other parrot lovers but without all the BS on Facecrap, etc.
Just ignore them.

LMAO FACECRAP! I love it! But what you said here, is an absolutely true statement! The amount of toxic people who feel the need to put others down, be SUPER rude, or be over all horrible human beings for their own confidence boost that crawl around like nasty pool of venom and acid called Facebook is WILD. I’m glad that neither of us really use social media. I just use PF, YT, and occasionally Tiktok for bird videos to get ideas for setups for Rico or something. And you are SO right!!! The amount of self centered, ignorant people on facecrap is astounding. It’s stupidly amazing and absurd that the avg person just stares in awe then falls on their rear laughing their head off. And the concept of facecrap “friends” is wild to me! It’s so hilarious that people ACTUALLY think they are friends when all it is is followers. It’s just a digital number (goes for facecrap “””friends””” and TikTok/twitter/whatever followers) that people care so much about. Like have you seen those people who are so self entitled who think that just because they have x amount of followers that they are entitled to free art? I’ve seen it SO much in the art community that it is just absolutely hilarious! Like, who CARES? All it is, is an imaginary, digital number. That’s it. No more, no less.


PF is such an awesome place and I am so happy it’s not like anywhere else. Things are up for discussion, people are willing to hear your situation and help come up with a solution! There are so many brilliantly creative minds here who think outside of the box and are super kind and helpful about it!

It’s not the stupid stinky pot of nastiness like FB where you are a horrible person according to them if: you are not in America, if you cannot afford something DESPITE being able to afford everything else, if you ask about something they don’t like, if you aren’t a Harrison’s or TOPs snob, if you have 1 dowel in your bird’s cage, if you don’t have access to a vet, if you are missing one noodle of knowledge out of the whole pot of spaghetti of knowledge, if you do things differently, etc.

PF is very different and a very kind place and I’m glad it’s that way. And the amazing moderation team keeps the stinkers away!

 

[Rico_Tiel]

Old people? Really. As an old person who has shown respect for people of all ages including young people I resent that comment.

I mean the toxic old people, not old people as a whole. I think a lot of old people are very kind souls but not the ones on Facebook. They are ruthless!

 

[DonnaBudgie]

I mean the toxic old people, not old people as a whole. I think a lot of old people are very kind souls but not the ones on Facebook. They are ruthless!

There are a lot of toxic people of all ages on the internet. Young people are cyberbullying each other sometimes with tragic results.

 

[Rico_Tiel]

There are a lot of toxic people of all ages on the internet. Young people are cyberbullying each other sometimes with tragic results.

Yes, I know, however I was mainly talking about fb. I was almost driven to taking my own life numerous times due to people who were around my age because it was so bad. The bullying, the physical and verbal abuse, all of it. It was both online and in person. So I do know how awful all ages are. But, I got in a better headspace because of birds, as stupid as it may sound. With birds, I found my other half. My soul and my passion. My heart animals if you will. Never been happier.

 

[Rozalka]

I agree with above, Facebook has a lot of toxic people... the same thing happens on Polish groups - nobody will understand that eg. for you the nearest avian vet is too fat because you don't have driving license and nobody wants to take you... or your fid has a phobia of humans - they will "scream" at you that you have to go there anyway. This happens even when a child posts (it's logical that they depend on parents because they aren't able to pay for everything). Or these people who say to not give fruit & veggies from stores... not everyone is able to get them from other sources.

I have written it at least 2 times here but each time when I see a post about toxic people from FB, this reminds me about my (and mines online friend) situation from last year....
My friend from another forum noticed a similar thing described in previous posts and decided to create own FB group where such people would be banned - and it worked well for few years, the group had positive opinions of being better than others... one day the admin banned one very active person who was giving a lot of advises which were so strict... while the same person was posting pics of her birds in a dirty cage with little (if any) toys. I was a mod so she started threatening me that if we don't make her a member again, she will revenge on us... and in this way one day our group was banned. How? She wrote a fake post on the biggest Polish parrot care group about how "bad" we are lying how toxic we are.

Since then I hardly ever write on Facebook

 

[DonnaBudgie]

Yes, I know, however I was mainly talking about fb. I was almost driven to taking my own life numerous times due to people who were around my age because it was so bad. The bullying, the physical and verbal abuse, all of it. It was both online and in person. So I do know how awful all ages are. But, I got in a better headspace because of birds, as stupid as it may sound. With birds, I found my other half. My soul and my passion. My heart animals if you will. Never been happier.

It doesn't sound stupid at all! I was bullied mercilessly from 10 years old and we didn't even have social media! You never really get over it 100%. It's one of the reasons I never wanted children- they can be so cruel. But I can say for sure that it can make you a better, more compassionate person. Birds and other animals are so therapeutic, as are SOME internet activities like FM.

 

[wrench13]

WARNING - put downs of any category or group of people are not tolerated here on ParrotForums. Lest this thread go over the line, please confine comments to the topic, which is already pretty toxic ( which I get).