That's something I can truly empathize with. Way back in early 97, I lost two dogs from old age within 6 months of each other. Then a fire took my CAG less then a year later. The fire took all my pictures. Nearly 20 years with dogs and just over 21 years with my CAG. The depression was great and still is present. I still occasionally call dogs and that CAG. My vet tech gave me a long list of books to read about grieving for pets. I bought and read, reread several. I refused to have anymore pets. After nearly 7 years my daughter got tired of me moping. She showed up with a just under 4 month old CAG. The feathered baby dived into my arms. She wouldn't let go. Then my daughter decided that I needed another dog. She dragged me to humane society adoption. I was told we weren't going to leave till I had a dog. So now I have two pets. Grief is sl different with each person. The key is to accept the grief. It's normal. But avoid letting it rule. In my case it was crochet and bead work. Let me tell you grief decreases considerably when you're crocheting 'The Beautides, Hail Mary' and more in thread w the smallest size crochet hook made! The tiny wire w a hook is #14. The larger hook did Mr & Mrs Clause. That hook and yarn was using garden hoses. I'd start crochet w tears. Those changed to joy as I completed a row or round. Notice a row or round. Not completed that's a set up for more grief.