Toby's Aggression

[angeleden353]

My BFA is very aggressive with everyone but me.. He is obviously attached to me and I try real hard to bring him around other family members but he is not budging with the aggression... My husband is over dealing with the aggression and is tired of being bitten... I am the only one who can do anything with him unless we are outside of his environment.. Help with some advice!!

 

[WharfRat]

Does he ever try to interact with him when you're not around?

 

[angeleden353]

He tolerates him, if he wants out of his cage or something but not for long.. and when I am at home i try to leave the room when he is trying to handle him...

 

[paulhanlon]

Amazons choose who they want to like and tolerate but once there mind is made up there is no point in trying to change there mind as it won't work if he tolerates your partner you may be able to get them to bond as for your family members there doomed if Toby dose not like them I'd keep him away from them as he may attack at some point.

 

[angeleden353]

well i have to put him in his cage at dinner because he flies to the table in their Plates... And I guess that is my fault because I feed him all the time off my plate... He loves me to death and my youngest daughter can pick him up from time to time but most of aggression is to my husband.. Of course my husband does not let him dominate him and he is not afraid of him but i really wish there is something he can do to bond with him...

 

[paulhanlon]

I would surgest your husband does some hands off training with him target training is a great way to build trust and a bond also get him to sit by his cage and talk to him if he does this in time Toby should come round but amazons a very picky birds but I'm sure if your husband trains him he will gain his trust and begin to build a bond.

 

[WharfRat]

He tolerates him, if he wants out of his cage or something but not for long.. and when I am at home i try to leave the room when he is trying to handle him

I don't think that works, I bet that bird KNOWS you're still home!!! The best I ever get along with our Zon's is when the wife is gone. I've actually been able to even pet them with her gone.

I can still handle them with her here, but it's a WHOLE different ballgame then, and yes, iffin I try to get near them when on the wife most of the time I'll get bit (but not that bad at all)

 

[Chaz12]

Sassy put a bruise on my arm the other night. One of my wife's friends was over and Sassy was on my arm. The lady started getting close and made a kissing noise moving toward Sassy. Sassy ruffled her feathers up and fanned her tail. Than Sassy started biting me and bit hard. I told the lady to step back and calmed Sassy down. Were Sassy bit me was where my T Shirt laid. So the affects left red marks and bruised. Sassy wasn't biting me intensionally but reacting to a stranger coming toward her. I am her favorite person and someone else wanted to take her away.

 

[WharfRat]

Chaz, no offence but the minute she started making noises or approaching I dang sure would've told her to stop. The only one I ever put in a situation of getting bit/clawed/whatever is my oldest son. I know he won't sue me & he knows darn well from their behavior what they may be up to. I don't think my Zon's would attack but I KNOW the GW's & especially the Hahn's will. I would always exercise caution with "strangers" in the house with a loose bird that isn't completely socialized, even then I'd be careful.

 

[henpecked]

Im glad rat said that," completely socialized". That's what the issue is after all. Sure they bond to one person and sure they become aggressive when hormonal, but they should be able to be around other people without "biting". We find our selves happy that we are that favorite person but need to work hard at getting them to accept others. Many times it's little things like not calling when your wife is handling the bird or letting others offer that special treat.It's a never ending task that comes with being a good parront. We owe it to our fids to keep at it.After all ,it's not they are going to grow up and leave home, they'll be around for a long time and it's never too late .socialize,socialize,socialize.

 

[Mare Miller]

I don't have an Amazon and am not very familiar with them, I do have a male umbrella cockatoo that had very much the same behavior as your zon. If I was holding him, Amigo, he would not let my husband, or any male, near me without consequences! My husband decided that it was best to just stear of Amigo and it wasn't worth getting bit by trying to have a friendship with him. Amigo now, afew years later, tolerates the men in my life. I and they still don't trust him but we can all sit in the same room now, amicably.

I think the secret, for us, was,,,don't EVER show aggression back at the bird. They are what they are and you cannot OVER-dominate an aggressive male parrot. It makes them worse. That's my opinion and experience, I could be wrong...

 

[Conuregirl]

i have really absorbed what everyone is discussing. i also agree with mare! everyone has made good points.

my only male pet ever, oliver, was very aggro once to everyone. he has simmered down a lot and has accepted me. i wish my husband could handle him. the bird wants no part of dh honestly. even when it's his favorite treat, he will either lunge with beak and wings open or retreat to the back of the cage or any other place. i direct my husband's posterior, tell him to avoid eye contact with the bird, and to remain relaxed. dh can't hold the submissive position lol. he can't helping looking at the bird, etc.

i don't know if this situation will ever change. i would love to hear how other people got a bird to accept someone they didnt like before. oliver hates all males and when i leave the room with oliver and my husband together, oliver wont stop screaming. it is only bad when my husband is with the bird alone. i have been trying to socialize them together but most of the time oliver can't relax at all. i will sit on the couch with dh and with oliver on me but he seems tense. he doesn't bite me or dh, but may take off or hide behind me. obviously, the bird was abused by a guy. i hope one day he will let that go

it is still a work in progress!

 

[WharfRat]

I'm not sure how this will sit with some but I will voice it. If you have a bird that is "unfriendly" to a spouse, & you feel the spouse is trying, if that bird senses fear or trepidation it WILL respond accordingly (as in I will bite you). You do have to have a firm hand with them at these times. I will admit, I do push more than I should with the Zon's sometimes, but it does let them know I ain't afraid or scared of them. I do most of the feeding here of all the birds & I will be stern & grab a beak if the need arises, the GW's are alot more difficult for my wife to handle than the Zon's are for me (and no, she ain't afraid of them). They are all unique personalities & they can all smell fear.

 

[lizardsmells]

Kazi hates my husband too, and most everyone else that isn't me. We've been working on that, moreso lately. He goes out with me several times a week and usually meets new people then. Of course they can't get anywhere near him or I get bitten, but they all stop and talk to him and me and I figure that's got to be worth something.

I also have other people (who aren't afraid of getting bitten too badly) feed him his favorite treats. I have no idea if that's working or not.

I will say that since using Avi-Calm and having the husband bring him his meals when he's home has helped a lot. Kazi still doesn't like him, but his aggression towards him has diminished quite a bit.

or had, Kazi's in a hormonal period so he's been pretty touchy lately, but I expect once his hormones calm down we'll be back to "I don't like you, but I can't be bothered to do anything about it at the moment".

 

[tharindhu006]

my parrot normally stay calm, but when touch his belly he get agressive, i dont know why

 

[belswalch]

My BFA is very aggressive with everyone but me.. He is obviously attached to me and I try real hard to bring him around other family members but he is not budging with the aggression... My husband is over dealing with the aggression and is tired of being bitten... I am the only one who can do anything with him unless we are outside of his environment.. Help with some advice!!

Try to let him interact with other when you are not around.. Maybe all he need is time to get well with other members of the family


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[angeleden353]

Well my husband gets home before I do everyday... But now he is not in the cage all day anymore because my daughter is home everyday and she is not a bird person but she will let him out everyday... My husband takes him upstairs with him when he gets home and he is usually ok with him.. But when I get home his whole mood towards him changes.. He will walk by the perch and he growls at him and sometimes his eyes begin to pin.. I mean like day and night... And every morning I wake up and he comes upstairs with me while I am getting ready for work and he is hardly awake and as soon as he see's my husband he tries to bite...

 

[henpecked]

Hey angel, sounds pretty normal, he's accepting others,just not when your around. He'll get better if you keep doing the things you're doing.Having hubby interact with him when your not home ,is the best thing you can do. The more people that can have good interactions with him, the more socialized and better behaved he'll become. Sure it will take some time,but in the long run it's worth it.Keep up the good work.

 

[WharfRat]

Yep, what Hen said (think I already said it as well) it has worked for me & the wife's Zons, it won't happen overnight though

 

[SpringCottageParrot]

We became Casper's guardians because he chose my wife Margaret as his new best friend. He has been very slow to accept me and I have the scars to prove it. However we are building a relationship and it works best when Margaret isn't around. I go and stand by the cage not looking at him and when he is ready he steps onto my shoulder. We then cross the room to sit down and he climbs from my shoulder onto the back of the sofa. We then watch videos or look at flickR galleries of other BFAs talking and playing and he is fascinated. I either leave him on the back of the sofa where he nods off to sleep until Margaret gets back or if he agrees, let him step onto my arm to go back to his cage.
It always has to be his idea though, if I say "come-on" he is just as likely to turn his back on me and walk away.
He is not possessive of Margaret though, we can cuddle when he is standing on her shoulder and he sometimes steps over to me. I guess we are lucky that he is (comparatively to Toby) quite gentlemanly.