Time to re-home?

[daviddewlow]

So.... I've had Ricky and Lucy since they were weaned. At about eight months in, Lucy started to become territorial and aggressive. She will defend the cage an chase Ricky all over. Ricky can take care of himself, and for the most part, they get along.

I figured that Lucy was going through puberty, and at some point, she would calm down.

Nope.

They are about 18 months old, and while Ricky is sweet, can be handled, and is making efforts at learning tricks, Lucy is a Ninja. She is sneaky, tries to attack me every day, and bites really hard.

This is not what I envisioned when I decided to provide a home for them.

At what point do I cut her loose?

If I replace her, am I just likely to get more of the same? I have no interest in breeding. I got a pair so that they could keep each other company.

Any advice or suggestions are appreciated.

Thanks in advance,

David

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[Inger]

They’re beautiful. I would hate to see you rehome her/them. Unfortunately, when you get a pair of parrotlets, they aren’t often going to be as tame as they might since they will often choose their own species for company. And even so, there’s no guarantee they’ll like each other, as you’re noticing. May I ask some questions?

Are they caged together or separately? If you don’t want them to breed, you’ll need to have them separate. You can keep the cages close together if they are upset by being apart. Separating them might also tone down the aggression. Parrotlets are notoriously cage-aggressive, and aggressive in general.

What have you done to get and/or keep them tame? All birds take a lot of effort in that department, and before I got Bumble, I was told that she could become untame in a matter of 2-3 days if I didn’t handle her. I don’t know if this is true because I won’t put it to the test. She’s been out of her cage every single day since I brought her home (got her at 7 weeks, she’s 2 now).

This post is invaluable. You may have to start at square one with Lucy.

https://r.tapatalk.com/shareLink?sh...orums.com/showthread.php?t=49144&share_type=t

Have you tried having them out of cage one at a time so they’re both getting undivided attention?

Target training is an amazing bonding tool and also gives you a little control (influence ??) over your bird. There are several threads around here about it. Once you’ve got that mastered, you can teach a bunch of other tricks. Trick training is fun and rewarding for both bird and human, and it’s always fun to show off your bird when you have guests [emoji16]

Basically, in the words of our esteemed Sailboat, it’s never the fault of the parrot. It’s always the fault of the human. With that in mind, what can you change so that you have a more rewarding relationship with your little guys? And also with that in mind, yes, rehiring and replacing her is going to get you more of the same.

And finally, I hope you’ve got your thickest skin on because there will be people who find the idea that you’re contemplating trading your bird in to be abhorrent and they are not going to be afraid to say so. Please remember that’s because the thing most of us here place first is the welfare of the bird.


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[daviddewlow]

They live together in a large aviary. I let them out daily and handle Ricky. I used to handle Lucy also, but she no longer allows it.

I'm pretty sure that the solution is to re-home Lucy. She causes too much stress for all involved.

I was hoping that perhaps if I was patient, she would settle down in time, but the more I research, the less I think that I will find a solution.

Now..... Aside from returning Lucy to the breeder, what would the best course of action be? I could not in good conscience give such an aggressive animal away.

The other day , she bit me so hard and attached herself to my finger. When I shook her off, she hit the floor and went limp. She was fine after a while, but I'm certain that she was concussed.

That's what I mean by saying that the situation must change.

Any thoughts?

DD

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[Inger]

Yes. Take both birds either back to the breeder or to a rescue and get yourself a Labrador.


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[daviddewlow]

Yes. Take both birds either back to the breeder or to a rescue and get yourself a Labrador.


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I'm going to keep Ricky and give Lucy to either an experienced bird family or to a rescue. Ricky is like family already....

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[Inger]

I have some experienced plet owners who may be interested in her. Where are you?


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[daviddewlow]

I have some experienced plet owners who may be interested in her. Where are you?


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Tampa, Florida

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[Inger]

I have a friend who would like you to contact her. I will send you a PM.


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[Flboy]

Hoping for the best for everyone! We have a fairly large community in the Tampa circle! I am not too far out either, Clermont!

 

[merlinsmom13]

These birds are bonded? You are essentially separating a husband & wife. Do whats best for the birds & rehome them both together.

 

[ParrotGenie]

They live together in a large aviary. I let them out daily and handle Ricky. I used to handle Lucy also, but she no longer allows it.

I'm pretty sure that the solution is to re-home Lucy. She causes too much stress for all involved.

I was hoping that perhaps if I was patient, she would settle down in time, but the more I research, the less I think that I will find a solution.

Now..... Aside from returning Lucy to the breeder, what would the best course of action be? I could not in good conscience give such an aggressive animal away.

The other day , she bit me so hard and attached herself to my finger. When I shook her off, she hit the floor and went limp. She was fine after a while, but I'm certain that she was concussed.

That's what I mean by saying that the situation must change.

Any thoughts?

DD

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I had the same problem with my Cockatiel Pepper. I almost re-homed Pepper as he use to just hiss and bite very hard and won't go back into cage when I let him out to get some time out of cage.

The issue is he bonded to my female Cockatiel and due to he was a pet store bird and likely mistreated, he wanted nothing to do with hands, or people and no matter how long I stay in front of his cage, or cleaned it daily and talk to him plus offer treats. He still did the same for months. What I did wrong at first was allow him to bond to my female Cockatiel after quarantining him.I sure have kept him in the separate cage till he bonded to me first.

What I did was use a stick and had him direct his attention to the stick and would put my finger closer and closer to him till he step up one day. Then kept doing my routine around him and one day he flew to me to get attention. Now he my favorite and well behaved as he listens when I let him out when compared to the others. Now I am glad I didn't re-home him as I didn't want to break the bond in the first place and turn out to be very bonded to me as he fly directly to me when others are around and etc. He still my most aggressive Cockatiel out of the flock, that will likely never go away as that how he is, hence why I named him Pepper. Good thing is he don't bite anymore and just argues with you when he doesn't want to do something,or annoyed at something. He actually my most talkative Cockatiel and loves to chirp a lot.

 

[ParrotGenie]

These birds are bonded? You are essentially separating a husband & wife. Do whats best for the birds & rehome them both together.

Breaking the bond will cause major stress. It is better to just re-home them both. Wonder if he tried stick training with her yet?

 

[EllenD]

Here's the thing...You haven't yet tried separating them into their own cages, correct? That would be step #1 before I ever thought about re-homing her, because #1 it's extremely likely that once she's separated into her own cage or "territory" and the stress of having to share her territory with another bird who she obviously isn't very fond of, or at least not in the way you wanted her to be, that she'll settle right down for you, and you'll then be able to work with her one-on-one every day and actually form a bond with her, rather than trying to form a bond with her while she's experiencing the stress that she is while sharing the same territory with the male...And then #2 is the fact that if you re-home her, she's likely going to go through some serious mental/emotional issues from being totally separated from you, from the other bird, and taken from the only environment she's ever known, even if she's not seemingly bonded to anyone right now (she is, trust me), and whomever adopts her is going to have the same problems with her and will re-home her, and again, and again, and again...As someone who has worked for a large Avian Rescue for over 8 years now, I can tell you with authority that you'll only be sending your bird into an endless cycle of re-homing...Not something you should do until you at least try separating them...

***The thing of it is that whenever you put two birds together, even if you do it when they are both babies, even if they are siblings, there is absolutely no guarantee of what type of relationship or bond they are going to have. And just like relationships between people are very complicated and have many different possible dynamics, so is the same with birds. You said that you "Only got two birds because you wanted them to have each other as friends", and this is an extremely common mistake that many, many people make every day when bringing birds into their homes and their families. And Love Birds are no different than any other parrot species, in-fact they actually seem to be more extreem when it comes to them accepting another bird as a "friend" or partner, it often just doesn't work out.

The idea when you bring home any single parrot, regardless of the species, is that they are in-fact Flock-Animals, and they do need to bond closely with someone, but that someone is supposed to be you or someone else in your home. No other birdy "friend" is necessary at all, nor is it often wanted. And the fact of the matter is that the rule of "Never buy a second bird as a friend for your first bird, but only bring home a second bird as another friend for yourself" is and remains forever true. And the reason is because you cannot EVER have any idea how two birds are going to get along...So the answer to your question above is a resounding YES, you may get the exact same result if you bring home any other bird in the future, it may or may not get along with your current male Love Bird, and then there are also many different types of relationships/bonds within whether they simply like each other/get along or not. So once again, unless YOU WANT ANOTHER BIRD AS ANOTHER COMPANION FOR YOURSELF, DO NOT BRING HOME ANY OTHER BIRDS AS A "FRIEND" OR COMPANION FOR YOUR EITHER OF YOUR CURRENT BIRDS, BECAUSE IT'S LIKELY TO NOT WORK AND END THE SAME WAY...The idea should be that you and others in your home are your bird's companions/friends, they bond with you, and you and the others who live in your home are their "Flock"...

***As far as your female Love Bird goes, I would highly advise you against re-homing her until you separate her from the male and into her very own cage with her own toys, perches, food and water, etc. (though I would leave their cages in the same room and close enough together so they can still see each other and talk to each other)...That in and of itself might very well result quickly in a change in the female's behavior and attitude, because she no long has to feel like she's constantly "defending her territory' from the male Love Bird...And then the idea would be that you start spending one-on-one time with her every day, working with her and bonding with her once she's no longer living in the same territory as the male...What you will most likely see happen over a short amount of time if you do this is that not only will the female's attitude and behavior do a complete 180, but BOTH BIRDS will form much stronger bonds WITH YOU, as you will become both of their companions. And they can still spend supervised time out of their cages with each other, typically once two birds in this situation are separated into their own territories they also start getting along with each other much better as well. It's all about jealousy, territoriality, and being forced to live with another bird and share territory with another bird that they just don't have the type of bond with where they want to do that.

I'd say that if I had to catagorize the type of relationship that your two Love Birds have, they have a "We simply tolerate each other because we have to, we don't hate each other or even dislike each other, but we also don't love each other, and we certainly don't like each other enough to share our territories OR our companions/flockmates with each other"...So once that jealousy over territory is removed, and once you start spending time with each of them one-on-one each day and they no longer feel that they're sharing you either, you're will likely have not only two very happy, healthy, loving birds, but two birds that are BOTH closely bonded with you finally...The female's past and current behavior is being forced by her dominant personality, coupled with the fact that she just doesn't want to share her territory or her "person" with that other particular bird...But that in no way means that she doesn't want to be closely bonded and loving with you, but you first need to remove the current stressor that is causing her to behave the way that she has been...And once you do that it's going to be a whole new ballgame...

 

[LuluNorman]

Hi David,

I am Inger's friend, Sarah -- she mentioned you might be rehoming Lucy and I had given her my number for you to text me.
I'm sorry Lucy is a disappointment to you, but as a living breathing creature, we can't control their personalities, and they bite out of fear more than being aggressive. She could be territorial, and by now, with no handling and lack of socialization, she is going to be territorial and frightened of you and hands. Who could blame her. Please contact me if you like; I would be happy to help find her a loving parrot-friendly home or to take her myself. Sounds like she needs time and attention.
Sarah

 

[daviddewlow]

Sarah,

I appreciate you taking the time to respond. There have been so many great suggestions I'm going to continue to keep trying to work with Lucy. I'm going to be purchasing her a separate cage and try handling her each day and see if that doesn't solve the problem. If everything fails I'll be back in touch thanks again!

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[Inger]

Ellen-they’re parrotlets [emoji3526]


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[Inger]

Sarah,

I appreciate you taking the time to respond. There have been so many great suggestions I'm going to continue to keep trying to work with Lucy. I'm going to be purchasing her a separate cage and try handling her each day and see if that doesn't solve the problem. If everything fails I'll be back in touch thanks again!

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David, I’m glad to hear we’ve made an impression on you! Now just remember, you’re starting from square one with her - or even square negative one since you two have some making up to do. Move at her pace. Expect her to bite you again so if it happens you don’t fling her away. Read that thread on binding, and remember we’re all here to help you.


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[LuluNorman]

Hi David,
That's great!!!! I think you can be successful and you and Lucy form a close bond -- don't forget, it's always on the bird's terms... Rule #1. And you have my number if you ever need pep talks, okay? Stay patient and loving with her and don't forget that parrotlets do bite - it might happen a thousand times again, but don't react or that reinforces the negative reason she bit in the first place. My parrotlet Coco alternates between snuggles and kisses and then charging me to taste my flesh. Her attitude is one of the many reasons I love her so!
Sarah

 

[Cardinal]

Yes. Take both birds either back to the breeder or to a rescue and get yourself a Labrador.


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I'm going to keep Ricky and give Lucy to either an experienced bird family or to a rescue. Ricky is like family already....

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If you have a large aviary, why not get more parrotlets of the same species; possibly Lucy may bond with another mate and you can keep Ricky as a companion inside. Or may be it is just a male and female thing. I don't know much about parrot lets but in IRNs the females can often be vicious and the male friendly. You cannot change a Parrot's nature.

 

[EllenD]

Ellen-they’re parrotlets [emoji3526]


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Yeah, I apologize, brain-fart...Same information applies, please pretend that it says "Parrotlets", lol...I've done that before, I think I go from one forum to the other and forget what species I'm thinking about at the time...But the information is all the same...

I'm so glad that you're choosing to try and work with your her David, it's the right choice. There have been lots of great suggestions given for you to try, and I think you're going to be pleasantly surprised after you give them a chance. I totally understand how hopeless a feeling you can end-up with when this happens and it seems that nothing you do helps it, and sometimes you just need a little help and advice. So you did the right thing and you're making the right choice to not give-up on Lucy. And don't ever hesitate to ask the community any questions you might have throughout the process...