The importance of check-ins when living alone

[Terry57]

Do you have regular check-ins with someone if you live alone?

For anyone who lives alone and doesn't have regular check-ins with family or friends, the following links may be something to think about. I have no connection with any of the companies, nor do I recommend one over the other. I stumbled across this on Reddit and it immediately resonated with me and I wanted to share. To be clear, I'm not speaking for ParrotForums, I'm sharing the info as a member

One of my budgies, Russell, came from a home where the owner had died and it was a week before anyone found him. This is Russell's story, in case you'd like to read it. (Trigger Warning: suicide)

If this sort of thing existed, or even made me decide to call my aunt every day at a predetermined time it would have saved her laying on her floor with a broken hip for a day and a half.

Whether someone decides to use a company like these, or just set up a time with someone to check in with each day, it could save not only their life but their birds as well. I just realized that if something happened here at home to Reg and I both, it would be several days before anyone found us. It's scary to think about.
I think I'll set something up with my daughter, just in case.

The site below has links to several different companies:

Best Free Check-In Apps for Seniors (or anyone) Living Alone

I'm including a link to each site here, as well as a short synopsis of each. They all can be found at the link above with the exception of "I'm still okay".

I'm still okay

From their Faqs:

After you sign up, you will receive a daily check-in email and each email contains a button that you simply click to confirm you are still doing well. Should you ever fail to click it, the system will automatically send an email to your contacts.

You get to customize who is contacted, what the message says, and also how often you want to receive your check-in email.

I’m Still Okay email notifications are free and they will always remain free!

We do, however, plan to add an option soon for SMS notifications that will have a low monthly fee to cover our expenses.

We invested a few thousand dollars of our money to start this service and the running costs are about $100 per month.

You can support us by buying us coffee or lunch using a service called Ko-fi: Buy us a coffee with Ko-fi

If you think this service is a good idea, please consider buying us a cup of coffee to keep us going.

Snug Safety

From their "How Snug works" section:

Snug is the free daily check-in app for seniors who live alone. Snug checks in with you every day to confirm you’re okay and if there is no response, alerts your emergency contacts so you can quickly get help (and your pets will be taken care of too). Snug has been used by thousands of Americans for over 10 million check ins.

• Basic Plan (free): If you miss your daily check-in, Snug will send a text message to each of your emergency contacts with your last known location. It is up to them to reach out to you to make sure you’re ok. The basic version is 100% free and without ads.
• Dispatch Plan ($9.99/mo or $99.99/yr): On the paid version of Snug, if you miss your check-in time, a Snug dispatcher will call your cell phone to ask if you’re alright. If you do not answer, they will call your emergency contacts to ask someone to check in on you. If the dispatcher is unable to get confirmation that someone will look in on you, they will request a wellness check. This is where a local authority such as the police, fire department or emergency medical services visit your last known location or home address.

Patronus - Personal Safety

(This is the only link I could find with info.)

Patronus is a FREE personal safety app. Patronus uses your phone's internet connection to let you "Panic" and alert friends and family via a notification in times of crisis. Each feature in Patronus has been designed keeping in mind multiple crisis scenarios to provide uninterrupted security while using minimal system resources.

Key Features:

• AVAILABILITY OF OPTIONS: Trigger Panic by pressing a button in the app, by pressing a button from the notification bar, or automatically through one of the many features present in the app.

• LOCATION MONITORING: Panic notification sent to your emergency contacts includes your last known location.

• TRUE AND FAKE PASSCODE: The true passcode will disable security, whereas the fake passcode will cause the app to pretend to disable security while sending a Panic alert. The fake passcode can be entered if you are being forced to enter a passcode.

• PANIC WITHOUT INTERNET: Panic would be triggered after a user-defined time period if the internet connection is lost.

• COMMUTE DETECT: Patronus will automatically switch on security if it detects that you are in a vehicle!

• DISASTER ALERTS (β): Get notified of natural disasters near you.

• IN CASE OF EMERGENCY (ICE): Patronus displays your information such as name and emergency contacts' details as a publicly viewable lock screen notification.

• SECURITY COUNTDOWN: Set periodic check-ins while security is active. Failure to respond to these check-ins will result in a Panic trigger.

• EMERGENCY CALL: Make an emergency call to your local authorities from the app when you or your emergency contacts go into panic mode.

• AUTOPILOT: Once settings and timeouts have been set up, Patronus has been designed to run 24/7 with minimal user intervention.

• PAIRS WITH ANDROID WEAR DEVICES (β): Patronus comes with an optional embedded Android Wear component. Once installed on Android Wear, Patronus is able to provide additional security.

• SILENT & OPTIMIZED: Patronus runs silently on your device, reducing battery drain and optimizing system resources.

Kitestring

Our service is easy to use and requires no special equipment. Simply sign up, choose your contacts, and set your check-in schedule. When it’s time to check in, you’ll receive a text message asking if you’re okay. Simply respond to let us know that you’re fine, or we’ll assume that something may be wrong and alert your designated contacts. If you’re ever in an emergency situation and can’t respond, we’ll send an alert immediately.

• Going out: Whether you’re meeting up with a stranger or just taking a midnight stroll, give Kitestring a heads up.
• Check in via SMS: Kitestring checks up on you with a simple text message. Reply to the message to check in.
• Stay connected: If you don’t check in, Kitestring sends your emergency contacts a personalized alert message.
• Nothing to download: And you don’t even need a smartphone.

bsafe

SOS Alarm
When the SOS alarm is activated, audio and video will automatically start to record.

Voice Activation
Simply activate the SOS alarm with your voice even if your cell phone is stowed away.

Live Streaming
Your guardians can see and hear everything that is happening in real time.

Recording
When the SOS alarm is activated, audio and video are automatically recording.

Follow Me
Your friends and family can join your journey virtually via live GPS-tracking.

Fake Call
Get your phone to call you and get out of unpleasant or threatening situations.

Guardians
You can add friends and family as guardians and get peace of mind wherever you are.

I'm Here
Use this feature to check-in and share your location with your selected guardians.

Timer Alarm
Define how long you want Bsafe to follow you, in case of an emergency.

*Basic version is free.

 

[ravvlet]

This is super important - I think also having a friend do in person check ins is good too. There was that rescue lady here who got in over her head, stopped letting people visit and it turned out she didn’t overwinter her birds properly and they all died, and no one came to get her until she was on her deathbed also.

Besides, I always clean extra well when people come over, and then I’m so relieved afterwards to have a sparkly clean house! Even though it only lasts like five minutes tops.

 

[DonnaBudgie]

This is super important - I think also having a friend do in person check ins is good too. There was that rescue lady here who got in over her head, stopped letting people visit and it turned out she didn’t overwinter her birds properly and they all died, and no one came to get her until she was on her deathbed also.

Besides, I always clean extra well when people come over, and then I’m so relieved afterwards to have a sparkly clean house! Even though it only lasts like five minutes tops.

Even when they are NOT living alone! It's such a sad dilemma. I have 88 year old parents who live 400 miles away in an independent living apartment in a full range services retirement community. Both are getting quite frail and though neither has significant dementia, neither has the common sense they had even five years ago. Money isn't an issue for them, but they can be painfully frugal to their own detriment.
They are both fall risks, Mom much moreso than Dad because she's in a wheelchair, but when Dad, who can walk without assistance, takes even a minor slip and ends up on the floor largely uninjured, it can take him hours of struggling to get up off the floor enough to get to the phone and call for help because their two "call for immediate assistance" buttons are tucked away in their dresser drawer instead of somewhere on their person! I dread the day Dad gets seriously injured in a fall and can't call to get help in time because neither wants to believe they need to wear their emergency call buttons at all times! Their facility also requires them to call a number in the morning before 10am every day to verify they are okay, but they frequently forget to call, forcing the staff to call or visit their apartment to make sure they're okay. Their failure to take necessary safely precautions is making me very nervous and I live too far away to be of any immediate help. I don't know what to do anymore. Help!

 

[Terry57]

Even when they are NOT living alone! It's such a sad dilemma. I have 88 year old parents who live 400 miles away in an independent living apartment in a full range services retirement community. Both are getting quite frail and though neither has significant dementia, neither has the common sense they had even five years ago. Money isn't an issue for them, but they can be painfully frugal to their own detriment.
They are both fall risks, Mom much moreso than Dad because she's in a wheelchair, but when Dad, who can walk without assistance, takes even a minor slip and ends up on the floor largely uninjured, it can take him hours of struggling to get up off the floor enough to get to the phone and call for help because their two "call for immediate assistance" buttons are tucked away in their dresser drawer instead of somewhere on their person! I dread the day Dad gets seriously injured in a fall and can't call to get help in time because neither wants to believe they need to wear their emergency call buttons at all times! Their facility also requires them to call a number in the morning before 10am every day to verify they are okay, but they frequently forget to call, forcing the staff to call or visit their apartment to make sure they're okay. Their failure to take necessary safely precautions is making me very nervous and I live too far away to be of any immediate help. I don't know what to do anymore. Help!

I'm so sorry, I also moved away from my great aunts who raised me, and it was terrifying. Are they in an assisted living facility? Thank goodness there is staff to make sure they're okay if they don't call.

 

[DonnaBudgie]

I'm so sorry, I also moved away from my great aunts who raised me, and it was terrifying. Are they in an assisted living facility? Thank goodness there is staff to make sure they're okay if they don't call.

It's independent living because my Dad is "still capable" of self care and caring for himself and Mom. They won't move to the assisted living section (stubborn) but each day Dad gets less and less able to handle all this, physically and cognitively. It's just a matter of time before they both fall while he's trying to help her and one or both are seriously injured. Nothing good happens when you get very elderly.

 

[DonnaBudgie]

It's independent living because my Dad is "still capable" of self care and caring for himself and Mom. They won't move to the assisted living section (stubborn) but each day Dad gets less and less able to handle all this, physically and cognitively. It's just a matter of time before they both fall while he's trying to help her and one or both are seriously injured. Nothing good happens when you get very elderly.

My sister lives 30 minutes from them and comes over at a moments notice but she doesn't know if there's a problem unless they tell her. And my folks are the type who hate causing drama and hate going to the hospital but they will go if need be. It's the stupid waiting-to-see-in-the-morning thing that's already led to one major stroke and many mini-strokes. If one of them has symptoms of a potential stroke they don't seem to understand the four hour rule of getting to the ER. They're liable to wait around until it's too late. I wish we could get them to understand how critical this is.

 

[wrench13]

If gettin' old wasn't such a PIA, it wouldn't be worth it.

 

[Terry57]

My sister lives 30 minutes from them and comes over at a moments notice but she doesn't know if there's a problem unless they tell her. And my folks are the type who hate causing drama and hate going to the hospital but they will go if need be. It's the stupid waiting-to-see-in-the-morning thing that's already led to one major stroke and many mini-strokes. If one of them has symptoms of a potential stroke they don't seem to understand the four hour rule of getting to the ER. They're liable to wait around until it's too late. I wish we could get them to understand how critical this is.

What a difficult situation, with no good answers. I hope that your dad soon realizes that he can no longer do this by himself, he may feel as if it's his job to care for your mom and that he's letting her down if he admits he can no longer do it.
Hopefully that happens before something awful occurs.
I'm so sorry you and your sister are going through this, and your parents as well.

 

[DonnaBudgie]

What a difficult situation, with no good answers. I hope that your dad soon realizes that he can no longer do this by himself, he may feel as if it's his job to care for your mom and that he's letting her down if he admits he can no longer do it.
Hopefully that happens before something awful occurs.
I'm so sorry you and your sister are going through this, and your parents as well.

Thank you for your kind words.

 

[SailBoat]

If gettin' old wasn't such a PIA, it wouldn't be worth it.

At this point in my life, I would rather be young and dumb that smart and old! Just saying!

 

[Vampiric_Conure]

I belong to a circle of friends who always check in on each other. We're always emailing and Facebooking with Each other Helps me feel like a part of a community and it helps me keep connected.

 

[SailBoat]

That is so very important!

Far too many individuals out their that are sitting in their room and have zero contact with anyone, as they shop and use the auto-checkout and call that they time with other people.

So very happy that you have a group of friends that connect with each other!!

Congratulations!!

 

[bill_e]

I just bought my wife an Apple Watch SE which has fall detection and emergency calling.
I checked into things that you wear and are monitored but all of them have pretty significant monthly fees and many of the are of no use outside of the house.
Something like an Apple or Galaxy watch has the same features and more, can be used with or without a phone nearby, works whereever there is a cell signal, and can be had for less than half of the monthly fees of the "medical" devices... And it's also a phone.
My wife's Apple watch on Verizon is like $12.50/month.

 

[Terry57]

I just bought my wife an Apple Watch SE which has fall detection and emergency calling.
I checked into things that you wear and are monitored but all of them have pretty significant monthly fees and many of the are of no use outside of the house.
Something like an Apple or Galaxy watch has the same features and more, can be used with or without a phone nearby, works whereever there is a cell signal, and can be had for less than half of the monthly fees of the "medical" devices... And it's also a phone.
My wife's Apple watch on Verizon is like $12.50/month.

That's an excellent idea, Bill!

 

[OttoVonRuthless]

I know this thread is old but it's a good one ( Thanks @Terry57 ) and wanted to share a personal story. This happened January 2013. (Trigger warning: death, uncomfortable situation)
My maternal grandmother and my aunt lived in a small town in Southern Tennessee in a mobile home. My aunt is physically and mentally handicapped from seizures in her 20s.
My Grams was a hoarder and had small paths to walk through her stuff, one bedroom was filled to 3ft from the ceiling.
Anyway one day the mail man noticed my Grams mail was still in her box, her car door and back door were still open. Unusual for her. He alerted neighbors who went over to check on her.
They found my aunt sitting on the couch soaked in urine and feces, standing every couple hours to drink from the kitchen sink in front of her. To her left in the only clear path was my Grams unconscious on the floor. They called 911 and took my aunt to their place, bathed her and gave her clean clothes before also taking her to the hospital.
My grams passed away at the hospital - she was 71. Untreated internal bleeding from ulcers. I lived near my mom in Iowa at the time, hospital just happened to find my mom's number in my Grams purse. We had 24hrs to get someone to pick up her body because the hospital didn't have a morgue. In her hoard was the brand new life alert pendant she never set up.
My aunt had TIA strokes while in the situation, she didn't know how to use the phone and couldn't get past my grams to leave the loveseat she was on. She's unsteady and uses a walker. She declined from a mind of a 10- 13 yr old to a 4-5yr old.
My aunt lives with my mom, her sister and is on hospice stage 4 colon cancer. She will be 60 on the 18th. Due to toxic relationship with my mom, I don't have contact with my mom and now my aunt going 11 years.
I helped clean out her mobile home and had nightmares for months about what my Aunt must have went through. We think she was like that for possibly 2 days.

So yes it is so important people have check ins!!! I say this and Otto / I live alone and go many days without anyone checking in.

 

[Terry57]

I know this thread is old but it's a good one ( Thanks @Terry57 ) and wanted to share a personal story. This happened January 2013. (Trigger warning: death, uncomfortable situation)
My maternal grandmother and my aunt lived in a small town in Southern Tennessee in a mobile home. My aunt is physically and mentally handicapped from seizures in her 20s.
My Grams was a hoarder and had small paths to walk through her stuff, one bedroom was filled to 3ft from the ceiling.
Anyway one day the mail man noticed my Grams mail was still in her box, her car door and back door were still open. Unusual for her. He alerted neighbors who went over to check on her.
They found my aunt sitting on the couch soaked in urine and feces, standing every couple hours to drink from the kitchen sink in front of her. To her left in the only clear path was my Grams unconscious on the floor. They called 911 and took my aunt to their place, bathed her and gave her clean clothes before also taking her to the hospital.
My grams passed away at the hospital - she was 71. Untreated internal bleeding from ulcers. I lived near my mom in Iowa at the time, hospital just happened to find my mom's number in my Grams purse. We had 24hrs to get someone to pick up her body because the hospital didn't have a morgue. In her hoard was the brand new life alert pendant she never set up.
My aunt had TIA strokes while in the situation, she didn't know how to use the phone and couldn't get past my grams to leave the loveseat she was on. She's unsteady and uses a walker. She declined from a mind of a 10- 13 yr old to a 4-5yr old.
My aunt lives with my mom, her sister and is on hospice stage 4 colon cancer. She will be 60 on the 18th. Due to toxic relationship with my mom, I don't have contact with my mom and now my aunt going 11 years.
I helped clean out her mobile home and had nightmares for months about what my Aunt must have went through. We think she was like that for possibly 2 days.

So yes it is so important people have check ins!!! I say this and Otto / I live alone and go many days without anyone checking in.

I'm so sorry that this happened in your family. Please have someone check in on you regularly, I worry about you and Otto. It's a shame we aren't neighbour's (wouldn't that be fun!)

 

[OttoVonRuthless]

I'm so sorry that this happened in your family. Please have someone check in on you regularly, I worry about you and Otto. It's a shame we aren't neighbour's (wouldn't that be fun!)

Not to sound like Mr. Rogers but Will you come and be my neighbor? Lol

 

[Terry57]

Not to sound like Mr. Rogers but Will you come and be my neighbor? Lol

If only I could! You're even in my old neck of the woods