My Too thinks I'm his mate.

[Erick123]

How can I reverse this? Its causing screaming at night and other behavior problems throughout the day.

 

[plumsmum2005]

Perhaps you can explain what you do with your 'too, how you handle him etc? Is he getting all worked up as a consequence? Maybe describe a typical day? An overall picture is probably going to be more helpful to us to help you rather than piece meal tid bits.

Have you got him plenty of toys to occupy?

 

[psychocircus91]

Shorter light cycles can help reduce hormonal behavior. Providing a dark room for him to sleep in for 12 hours is ideal.

Low energy foods can help minimize excessive energy: Lots of veggies, small amounts of pellets, very small amounts of fruit/seeds

Keep handling to a minimum during hormonal times: When handling, never pet below the neck. When hormonal, spend your time together talking, training, and playing with toys rather than the typical handling you may be doing.

 

[Scott]

I remember you from earlier this year! Peanut is likely closely bonded to you, and this may be the first hormonal cycle since summer.

Your best tactics are succinctly posted above!

 

[Erick123]

My typical day with him is me spending time with him in his room. He has alot of toys and I'm usually either playing with him, supervising him while he plays, or sitting on the sofa with him. When I first got him, I was making all the wrong mistakes. I would cuddle with him, scratch under his wing and so on. Once I learned those are things you shouldn't do I stopped, but it seems he sees me as his mate now. He always wants to cuddle and starts panicking when I leave the room. Sometimes I have my grandmother watch him, and he's a totally different bird with her. He's calm, never tried to cuddle, but when I enter to the room, its a different story. He tried to cuddle with me today and it lead to a painful bite. Aside from the tactics posted on this thread, is there other ways to give him the hint that I'm a companion and not a mate? What if he didn't see me for a couple of days?

 

[Teddscau]

Good question. Hmm... No handfeeding, no warm food, no snuggling (you can preen his head and neck, but nothing else)... It's hard to say because romantic gestures and non-sexual friendly behaviours can be quite similar. Maybe try to make your together time about playing, dancing, singing, training, etc., rather than cuddling or being calm and intimate together. You want him to see you as a playmate, not somebody to snuggle with. Birds who are strictly friends tap beaks, wrestle, fly together, explore, sing to each other, dance, destroy things, show off, and occasionally preen each others' heads, but they don't necessarily sleep together or cuddle. That's what their monogamous mate is for. I personally wouldn't stay away from him for a few days, as this can cause anxiety and feelings of betrayal. When he's out with you, make sure it's nice and bright so he doesn't think you're trying to lure him into your love nest or something (gross, yes, but the only time it's dark in the wild is at sleepy time or when they're inside their nest). Also, make sure he doesn't go near your face, chest, or shoulders. He can hang out on your forearm but no higher. Bringing that close to your face is far too intimate. Full body contact is a no no (except with my birds because they know I'm not a romantic partner).

It's hard when keeping single birds (i.e., a one bird household) because you have to fulfill all their social needs, including that of a mate. Most parrots are monogamous, and they have a strong emotional and instinctual need to find a life partner to raise their young with. Monogamous birds with such long lifespans...with a variety of these species, if the sex ratio is skewed, they'll settle for a same sex partner to raise young with (this is seen in some species of albatross). This is one of the reasons I believe in keeping more than one bird. They don't have to be the same species (they should be of a similar size, personality, and beak strength), they just need to be able to do bird things with them. Obviously I'm not suggesting to go out and get another bird, but that's something to think for in the (distant) future after you have a hang of things.

 

[Erick123]

Thank you all for the advice.

 

[Erick123]

So I got a nasty bite from my Too today. I was thinking, is it a good idea to keep him in the cage for now. I will still interact with him by singing and reading, but I feel breaking this whole him seeing me as a mate and aggressiveness can be stopped with this method. Thoughts?

 

[psychocircus91]

I would still let him out. Hang out with him close by on his stand. Talk to him, but temporarily eliminate handling if you can. Long sleeves with a towel under the sleeve for putting him back if you are worried about the bite.

 

[Erick123]

I'm afraid to do that because he wants to get on me. He follows me where ever I go which is what happen today. He wouldn't take no for an answer. When I picked him up and tried to set him on the sofa, he bite me very hard. I made alot of mistakes when I first got him which led him to believe I'm his mate. With limited handling, is it possible for him to see me as a companion or a play buddy?

 

[psychocircus91]

Is he able to climb off his stand to follow you?

I would say it is likely that he is hormonal right now, so these behaviors will decrease in a couple weeks. If that's the case, you can reevaluate your relationship when things calm down and address things properly.

That being said, locking him in his cage is never the answer, IMO.

 

[plumsmum2005]

Cockatoos are very interested in everything and he will be noticing your change in behaviour and is telling you so. The change you want is going to take time and patience. Try and start new things that you do together, if he will fly try and get him going back and forth ie you to cage and back. If he wants to be with you set him on a cushion at your side, offer the odd treat, head skritch. If you totally withdraw he will probably bite more as it is his way of telling you things have changed and to do what you used to. The beak is a communication tool also. Plum will pinch me if something is not right and I need telling!

 

[Erick123]

He has climbed down his stand before. At the moment, he is out of the cage when I'm not home while my grandmother supervises him. When its my turn to spend time with him, hes in his cage. I sing and playing peek-a-boo with him. I might try that for a couple of weeks or maybe just for this week. To be honest, I'm a little scared of him now since the bite. What do you guys think?

 

[bill_e]

Try what the other's suggested, I found that 12-14 hours of dark helped a lot. I have a black cover for my bird's cage and I'm pretty religious about getting her to bed on time.

When Nike is horny I do not let her on my shoulder and hardly pick her up at all....but the last time I went through that she wasn't flighted so I may have the same problem as you when she's in season.

I know it's a nasty word around here but if I had that problem I would clip her again so that she would stay where I put her as it would be too noisy to leave her in her cage. Thinking about it you may be able to either get a second cage or move him to your common area so he can be caged and still near you.

Whenever I talk about hormones to my My CAV he instructs me (though I disregard the instruction) to always keep Nike at 12" away from my head because he says that it's documented that inside that 12" personal zone in the wild is reserved only for mates....any other flock member get's told in no uncertain terms to stay outside that area. So letting her inside the 12" is like touching her in all the wrong places.

 

[Scott]

I'm hoping the problem is hormones, rather than a permanent change in personality and stance towards you.

Don't know if you are a fan of Star Trek TOS, but one episode focused on Spock's mating season, the Vulcan "Pon Farr." He was utterly out of control, though the essential Spock remained within. This too shall pass, and it did. If these behaviors continue more and a few more weeks, you'll have to reassess. Might even have to return to "step one" of bonding and gaining trust.

I'd try Bill's advice above. Didn't know about the 12" sphere of admission, but makes sense.

As Don suggested, simply locking him in the cage is not a good solution. He'll just stew with his emotions, and perhaps turn them inwards with plucking or other destructive behaviors.

Nothing wrong with being a bit scared of that beak, though he will absolutely sense that emotion. Try your best to not show that "human" side in his presence!

 

[eagle18]

I am sorry about your experience. Too bites can really hurt. My male umbrella can get hormonal but rarely aggressive. I put him in a dark room to sleep for 14 hours and feed him chickpeas. One or the other seems to really help. I also don't encourage him to get up on my lap during that period. When he does, I place him firmly on the floor to play with his toys.