I need help

[Juice The Duck]

I’ve had my cockatiel for about 4 years her name is lance(we thought she was a mail for the first three years) but she is terrified of hands. I don’t know if the care takers at the pet store traumatized her but she’s always been deathly terrified of hands. I was wondering if there’s anyway I could help her realize me and my family aren’t a threat.

 

[Free as a bird]

It's best when a bird is handled from young. It will be hard to get her used to your hand now.

One method is what I call the starve technique. Don't feed her for a day and then offer her the food from your hand. If she's hungry enough she will start eating from your hand. From there try get her to perch on your hand to eat. Keep feeding her from your hand until she gets used to it

 

[widor]

Hi, does she terrified of hands only? I mean how about sitting by/ on you, come close to you? Takes any treats from you? If yes, I think you can keep trying offering her favourite treat and if you are patience enough she might come around. It can take soo much time and still- they are wild animals and if we are lucky to earn their trust is worth trying.
I have 3 years old conures, one is willing to step up but only for walnuts other is no, no way .But he likes to sit by me like saying hiya, what are you doing? I am fine with this,unfortunately I do not have too much time for more training right now.

 

[saxguy64]

It's best when a bird is handled from young. It will be hard to get her used to your hand now.

One method is what I call the starve technique. Don't feed her for a day and then offer her the food from your hand. If she's hungry enough she will start eating from your hand. From there try get her to perch on your hand to eat. Keep feeding her from your hand until she gets used to it

I'm sorry, I have to respectfully disagree here with starving a bird into submission. Parrots are not like a dog. To maintain a weight capable of flight, they have very little in the way of reserve calories, which is why they eat so frequently. This technique is sometimes suggested when shifting them to a healthier/different diet. It doesn't work. Parrots can and will starve themselves to death if they don't want what you're giving them.

As far as training, this seems like a different take on "flooding" in which you force the behavior on them until they give up. I can't see a circumstance where a parrot with a broken spirit is a good thing. For a highly intelligent, emotional being, it's mentally debilitating. People do it, and it's so sad to see them like that.

 

[onamom]

I am a big believer in positive reinforcement so I have to agree with @saxguy64 that I do not recommend withholding food as a training method.

@widor asked some good questions above. Can you tell us more about how you have interacted with them over the years? Are they comfortable with you and afraid of only your hands? Or are you not able to handle them at all?

 

[Jcas]

I'm sorry, I have to respectfully disagree here with starving a bird into submission. Parrots are not like a dog. To maintain a weight capable of flight, they have very little in the way of reserve calories, which is why they eat so frequently. This technique is sometimes suggested when shifting them to a healthier/different diet. It doesn't work. Parrots can and will starve themselves to death if they don't want what you're giving them.

As far as training, this seems like a different take on "flooding" in which you force the behavior on them until they give up. I can't see a circumstance where a parrot with a broken spirit is a good thing. For a highly intelligent, emotional being, it's mentally debilitating. People do it, and it's so sad to see them like that.

I have to agree. As someone who works with all kinds of animals not just birds, I’ve never used the withholding of basic necessities to train an animal. They know that you provide food and if you don’t give it to them they will trust you less because they can’t even rely on you to meet their basic needs anymore. Instead, when taming, I will very slowly move closer to the animal while they are calm, stopping if they show any sign of wanting to move away. I might just slowly raise my hand for a moment and then put back down. Gradually I will move towards touching the cage and then eventually putting my hand in the cage. I only move my hand closer once the animal is comfortable every time with the previous distance/ placement of my hand. The idea is to make hands totally normal and non-threatening. It will take a long time of patient repetition to get there, as birds are hardwired to be cautious. With time and patience though, you may very well be able to get your bird much more comfortable with hands!

 

[hiriki]

Just wanted to throw my 2 cents in agreement not to starve your bird. Personally, I don't agree with that technique for any animal, but birds in particular need to develop trust slowly and organically in my experience. Instead, you can try to find a treat that your bird likes--for instance, if you notice she likes sunflower seeds, remove just sunflower seeds from her regular diet and only offer that particular treat when she is interacting with you.

Also, don't try to jump straight to stepping up. If she's afraid of hands, reward her for even approaching you closer than normal. Every time she gets a little closer, give her a treat, until eventually she's on your hand.

 

[saxguy64]

Well said above. I might also add, regarding being hardwired to be cautious, they have absolutely no natural reason to trust us. None. Trust is earned, and that trust can be broken very easily. Always best to try to make sure they know that only good things come from humans.

 

[wrench13]

Not to beat a dead horse, but what would happen if the parrot flatly refuses to eat from your hand? Parrots are very capable of starving themselves to death when given a single food choice, like a pellet, that they will not eat. Sorry, Free as a Bird, the advice about trying a starvation technique to train is not sound training.

Training parrots to do anything has to be a cooperative effort on both parts of the participants, you and the parrot.

21 tricks in 19 minutes

 

[Free as a bird]

One day without food is not starving your bird...

Birds are resilient, in the wild they can go days without food, even weeks...

So yea, just one day is not the cruel starvation torcher some of you are claiming...

All your doing is waiting until the bird is hungry before offering it food from your hand... It works...

 

[hiriki]

Respectfully, "Your bird isn't going to die" is not the defense that you think it is.

I can't speak for everyone here but my point was that trust building with a bird needs to be gradual, slow, and mutual, without coercive tactics like withholding food.

 

[hiriki]

That's not even mentioning the fact that I don't believe you're correct about how long birds can survive without food.

How Long Can A Parrot Go Without Food? (Small + Large Birds)

(Last Updated On: May 27, 2023)Routine and reliability are important to parrots, so they need scheduled mealtimes. Parrots eat first thing in the morning at sunrise and again at sunset, […]

www.allaboutparrots.com

How Long Can Parrots Survive Without Food? – Beak Craze

 

[DonnaBudgie]

I have to agree. As someone who works with all kinds of animals not just birds, I’ve never used the withholding of basic necessities to train an animal. They know that you provide food and if you don’t give it to them they will trust you less because they can’t even rely on you to meet their basic needs anymore. Instead, when taming, I will very slowly move closer to the animal while they are calm, stopping if they show any sign of wanting to move away. I might just slowly raise my hand for a moment and then put back down. Gradually I will move towards touching the cage and then eventually putting my hand in the cage. I only move my hand closer once the animal is comfortable every time with the previous distance/ placement of my hand. The idea is to make hands totally normal and non-threatening. It will take a long time of patient repetition to get there, as birds are hardwired to be cautious. With time and patience though, you may very well be able to get your bird much more comfortable with hands!

Agree! Once your bird is very comfortable with your face being close by (doesn't run away) place your hands close to your face so he sees your hands as just another safe part of you.

 

[TeekoGreenCheek]

I'm sorry, I have to respectfully disagree here with starving a bird into submission. Parrots are not like a dog. To maintain a weight capable of flight, they have very little in the way of reserve calories, which is why they eat so frequently. This technique is sometimes suggested when shifting them to a healthier/different diet. It doesn't work. Parrots can and will starve themselves to death if they don't want what you're giving them.

As far as training, this seems like a different take on "flooding" in which you force the behavior on them until they give up. I can't see a circumstance where a parrot with a broken spirit is a good thing. For a highly intelligent, emotional being, it's mentally debilitating. People do it, and it's so sad to see them like that.

If I even tried to starve Teeko which i wouldnt..he'd have a fit. And i wouldnt sleep!

 

[Terry57]

One day without food is not starving your bird...

Purposefully withholding food is cruel and serves no purpose except to let the bird know that you can't be counted on for it's basic needs. This is not the way to build trust, and it can create psychological issues that the bird will carry with them for the rest of their lives.

Birds are resilient, in the wild they can go days without food, even weeks...

Weeks? Care to cite your sources on this?
The smaller the bird, the less time they can go without food.
Humans are also resilient, when is the last time you went days or weeks without food? Have you ever thought about how it would feel to have someone withhold food from you for days or weeks?

So yea, just one day is not the cruel starvation torcher some of you are claiming...

No animal should ever have to worry about whether they're going to be fed. Not for a day or any other amount of time.

All your doing is waiting until the bird is hungry before offering it food from your hand... It works...

You know what works better? Allowing your bird to take however long he needs to trust you. That is what creates a true bond that is based on mutual respect, rather than one based on fear or hunger.

I saw your other thread here:

Weird eating behaviour

With what you've shared in this thread, it sounds like they are eating so much because they have no idea how long they will have food.
I had a cockatiel who suffered some kind of food trauma before he came to us, and he frantically ran to his dishes as soon as the food went in and ate until he couldn't hold anymore. He did this for all the years we had him, and it was heartbreaking to see.

I want to plead with you to change your training methods. I believe that you will be pleasantly surprised at how much stronger the bond will be that you are able to create with your birds when the bond is based on trust and respect.

 

[TeekoGreenCheek]

Purposefully withholding food is cruel and serves no purpose except to let the bird know that you can't be counted on for it's basic needs. This is not the way to build trust, and it can create psychological issues that the bird will carry with them for the rest of their lives.


Weeks? Care to cite your sources on this?
The smaller the bird, the less time they can go without food.
Humans are also resilient, when is the last time you went days or weeks without food? Have you ever thought about how it would feel to have someone withhold food from you for days or weeks?



No animal should ever have to worry about whether they're going to be fed. Not for a day or any other amount of time.



You know what works better? Allowing your bird to take however long he needs to trust you. That is what creates a true bond that is based on mutual respect, rather than one based on fear or hunger.

I saw your other thread here:

Weird eating behaviour

With what you've shared in this thread, it sounds like they are eating so much because they have no idea how long they will have food.
I had a cockatiel who suffered some kind of food trauma before he came to us, and he frantically ran to his dishes as soon as the food went in and ate until he couldn't hold anymore. He did this for all the years we had him, and it was heartbreaking to see.

I want to plead with you to change your training methods. I believe that you will be pleasantly surprised at how much stronger the bond will be that you are able to create with your birds when the bond is based on trust and respect.

Idk if anyone has watched Pokémon but Terry is the real life Pokémon trainer! Lol and I couldn't agree more.

 

[Terry57]

Idk if anyone has watched Pokémon but Terry is the real life Pokémon trainer! Lol and I couldn't agree more.

I'm showing my age, what is a Pokémon trainer? Thank you if it's a compliment, and never mind if it isn't...heehee

 

[Terry57]

I’ve had my cockatiel for about 4 years her name is lance(we thought she was a mail for the first three years) but she is terrified of hands. I don’t know if the care takers at the pet store traumatized her but she’s always been deathly terrified of hands. I was wondering if there’s anyway I could help her realize me and my family aren’t a threat.

Let's bring the focus back on Juice The Duck's question.

I've had birds that took years to trust me, they had all come from some sort of abuse or neglect. I would talk quietly to them, and let them choose how close they wanted to be to me or my hands. They all eventually came around and take things willingly from my hands.
They realized that I was a safe space and that I wasn't going to hurt them, and they have a routine they are comfortable with (that of course includes feeding them). It is so worth the time and patience spent to gain their trust!

This is a wonderful thread about bonding and building trust:

Tips for Bonding and Building Trust

 

[TeekoGreenCheek]

I'm showing my age, what is a Pokémon trainer? Thank you if it's a compliment, and never mind if it

I'm showing my age, what is a Pokémon trainer? Thank you if it's a compliment, and never mind if it isn't...heehee

It's about animals that kinda have these powers. But they are built off the bond and training of the trainer..lol it's a long story but it's a compliment!

 

[Free as a bird]

Purposefully withholding food is cruel and serves no purpose except to let the bird know that you can't be counted on for it's basic needs. This is not the way to build trust, and it can create psychological issues that the bird will carry with them for the rest of their lives.


Weeks? Care to cite your sources on this?
The smaller the bird, the less time they can go without food.
Humans are also resilient, when is the last time you went days or weeks without food? Have you ever thought about how it would feel to have someone withhold food from you for days or weeks?



No animal should ever have to worry about whether they're going to be fed. Not for a day or any other amount of time.



You know what works better? Allowing your bird to take however long he needs to trust you. That is what creates a true bond that is based on mutual respect, rather than one based on fear or hunger.

I saw your other thread here:

Weird eating behaviour

With what you've shared in this thread, it sounds like they are eating so much because they have no idea how long they will have food.
I had a cockatiel who suffered some kind of food trauma before he came to us, and he frantically ran to his dishes as soon as the food went in and ate until he couldn't hold anymore. He did this for all the years we had him, and it was heartbreaking to see.

I want to plead with you to change your training methods. I believe that you will be pleasantly surprised at how much stronger the bond will be that you are able to create with your birds when the bond is based on trust and respect.

Nothing wrong with some coercion.

Everyone uses food to train pets.
Iv tamed many aviary birds this way that couldnt have been tamed otherwise. Their all doing just fine and their owners are thrilled...

Your idea about my birds is not plausible. See my birds were weaned from baby and already tame when I got them. Their cages have always had food in them I didn't use any coercion on them...

Good try but your mixing up a technique used to handle a bird which is very temporary, one day, with the way to always treat a bird.