I don’t know if I can do this

[Flapjack]

I love my ggc Kure to death, but I’m starting to wonder if both of us would be better off if I rehomed her. I worry constantly that she is in danger or sick. I’ve been stuck in a loop since my mom used a crock pot Sunday night. I had researched the brand and everything was fine, but I broke down when she started using it. I was obsessing over Kure for hours, redoing hours of research about Teflon poisoning. She was fine, there was no Teflon in the crockpot, but I couldn’t let it go. Now she’s started tucking that one foot as I said in an earlier post and I’ve been freaking out. I’ve spent hours reading online threads about bumblefoot egg binding and fractures. I criticize every behavior and every look. She was backing up weird on my bed, she didn’t eat all her vegetables at a certain time, she is dropping a lot of feathers today (she is molting). Silly little things like that keep catching my attention and I can’t let them go, I’ve been bothering her by manhandling her to look at her foot vent etc. I’m so scared that something is wrong. I just went out and bought some cuttle bones on the off chance that maybe she is going to lay and that is why that one foot has been affected.

What scares me the most is what if something is really wrong and I’ll just think it is in my head when it is not.

I just don’t know what to do. I don’t know anyone in “real life” who owns birds. I feel like there’s no one to go to. I don’t have the resources to take her to the vet 10 times month because I think something is weird. Every time I have so far it’s been absolutely nothing and just extra stress for her. I just can’t tell when something is actually wrong.

I’m starting to think I’m not cut out for this. I love her so much but that’s not worth her health.

Has anyone ever felt like this? I don’t know what to do, any advice or suggestions would be appreciated.

 

[itslizze91]

i was the same way when i got my Leo! stressing about everything, researching everything i could!

its normal to feel those things! you want the best for her! she's your baby!

for the tucked in foot is she sitting on a perch. because One common sleeping position for conures is the one-legged stance. In this position, the bird will tuck one foot up into their feathers and balance on the other. This might look uncomfortable to us, but it’s perfectly normal for conures and other birds. It’s thought that this position helps conserve body heat and minimize muscle fatigue.

you can also just call an avian vet to ask questions!!

also since she's molting here is a link of different ways you can help her!
https://imparrot.com/conure-molting/

Understanding The Molting Process Of A Conure: What To Expect | PetShun

Learn about the molting process of a conure and what you can expect when your pet goes through this natural shedding of old feathers. Discover tips for supporting your conure during this time and promoting a healthy molt.

petshun.com

Molting can be physically uncomfortable for conures, so they may exhibit changes in their behavior. Some common signs include increased preening, irritability, and a decrease in activity levels.

 

[Talaya]

Dear Flapjack, such a worry for you. I’m sorry you are finding many things so stressful right now. Know that teflon/chemical poisoning is very quick and birds have been known to pass in minutes.
The foot I expect she was just relaxing, having a nap or keeping warm. It such a great heart you have to care for her.
They pick up on our emotions so easily, and if you’ve been worrying more than usual, I suspect she has caught your glances, into stares, into inquisitive peers & may just have been backing up as she was a little unsure of your expression, eye dilation, cheek coloring, eyebrow movement, thought of being picked up again..etc. a sickly bird is very often one that is in a constant state of fluff up so the feathers are all standing on end around the face trying to keep warm, and often lethargic. Only you know your baby. Cuttle bones are even recommended by my vet to have around for my boy, so I do ,but he never eats them.
Think of all the fun and love you have developed in the time you have been together, and cherish every day you spend together more. You would feel dreadful if you let her go and would then be worrying about her health still.
I’ve had my boy a few years now and we’ve been to the vets once… he was limping. Often they are happy to give advice on the phone.
Otherwise , he is just being a bird, keeping warm, going to sleep, making funny grunts etc.
moulting is often painful and stressful for our babies.

 

[Flapjack]

Thank you both, I will check out that molting link. She’s seems to always be molting, she’s never had like a huge one, but every few weeks she’ll drop a ton of feathers. I hope you are right about her foot. She is only doing it with one and it is very often, pretty much whenever she stops moving around. I know they hide thier symptoms but if you know what to look for are the signs obvious? I’m glad to know I’m not the only one to be overwhelmed like this. Thank you again.

 

[Vampiric_Conure]

Thank you both, I will check out that molting link. She’s seems to always be molting, she’s never had like a huge one, but every few weeks she’ll drop a ton of feathers. I hope you are right about her foot. She is only doing it with one and it is very often, pretty much whenever she stops moving around. I know they hide thier symptoms but if you know what to look for are the signs obvious? I’m glad to know I’m not the only one to be overwhelmed like this. Thank you again.

**Sends tons of hugs**

As for molting - some parrots, if they're indoors a lot, will molt continuously throughout the year. My cockatiels do this. It can be frustrating and annoying sometimes, LOL!

 

[Snow2023]

I can tell your bird is quite safe. I may not know what this feels like but I think your bird is fine from the replies above. I think before you are researching another thing you take a nice peaceful walk, or just take some time to relax. If you are to worry about your bird take a shorter amount of time. Also, it's proven that you are more efficient in learning when you have had some fresh air. If I am misjudging the situation I am so sorry. There are as mentioned avian vets on 24/7 and these forums to answer your questions. I hope this helps.

 

[wrench13]

Listen to me - you will drive yourself to a hospital if you dont ease up. The very best way to monitor your parrots health is to weigh the bird almost daily with a kitchen scale that reads out in grams. A sick parrot will start to lose weight WAY before outward signs are visibly evident. Yes look for outeward signs, but this should be the first thing to monitor. A loss of 2-5% means yes, something is wrong and further investigation is needed.

 

[hiriki]

Hi! I think you've already gotten a lot of good insight into the skill of monitoring the health of someone or something in your care, so I won't really heap onto that pile of good advice with even more. Instead, I want to give you some insight into similar struggles I've had.

I've had birds for a decade now--which feels like a long time, although many folks on this forum have me beat in that department. Over time, you do start to recognize the difference between a tired/molting/under the weather bird vs. a genuinely sick bird. You can certainly take steps to have a more objective view of your bird's health in the beginning to compensate a bit for the experience that you lack at this moment, but you will almost certainly find that these things become easier with time... BUT!

Your mental health is going to have a profound impact on how these things affect you. I have gone down my own mental health journey and can say with confidence that during difficult periods of my life, where I struggled generally with anxiety, it was much harder to cope with odd behaviors in my flock. I panicked more often, took more trips to the emergency vet, etc. The most effective way I've learned to manage the anxiety around my flock's well being is not changing how I interact with them or how I care for them.... it's by addressing the root issue, my own mental health, through therapy and other avenues.

Since you mentioned your mom, I wonder if you might be young--maybe even under 20? (I'm 30 and live with my mother by choice, so I know I can't guess your age for sure lol, but that's what it made me think.) Going to therapy in my early 20s made an incredibly tumultuous period of my life so, so much more bearable. If you haven't tried it, I'm a huge fan of therapy and would recommend it! If you're already in therapy, then I'm very happy for you, and I think you should bring this up with your therapist. It would be better to approach this situation from the perspective of "this anxiety is impeding my regular functioning and is not rational," rather than using resources here or on Google to try to compartmentalize between symptoms that would be rational to worry about vs. wouldn't be. Not sure that makes sense, I hope it does.

 

[Inger]

Hi! I think you've already gotten a lot of good insight into the skill of monitoring the health of someone or something in your care, so I won't really heap onto that pile of good advice with even more. Instead, I want to give you some insight into similar struggles I've had.

I've had birds for a decade now--which feels like a long time, although many folks on this forum have me beat in that department. Over time, you do start to recognize the difference between a tired/molting/under the weather bird vs. a genuinely sick bird. You can certainly take steps to have a more objective view of your bird's health in the beginning to compensate a bit for the experience that you lack at this moment, but you will almost certainly find that these things become easier with time... BUT!

Your mental health is going to have a profound impact on how these things affect you. I have gone down my own mental health journey and can say with confidence that during difficult periods of my life, where I struggled generally with anxiety, it was much harder to cope with odd behaviors in my flock. I panicked more often, took more trips to the emergency vet, etc. The most effective way I've learned to manage the anxiety around my flock's well being is not changing how I interact with them or how I care for them.... it's by addressing the root issue, my own mental health, through therapy and other avenues.

Since you mentioned your mom, I wonder if you might be young--maybe even under 20? (I'm 30 and live with my mother by choice, so I know I can't guess your age for sure lol, but that's what it made me think.) Going to therapy in my early 20s made an incredibly tumultuous period of my life so, so much more bearable. If you haven't tried it, I'm a huge fan of therapy and would recommend it! If you're already in therapy, then I'm very happy for you, and I think you should bring this up with your therapist. It would be better to approach this situation from the perspective of "this anxiety is impeding my regular functioning and is not rational," rather than using resources here or on Google to try to compartmentalize between symptoms that would be rational to worry about vs. wouldn't be. Not sure that makes sense, I hope it does.

I just want to second this. I was trying to figure out how to say all of that. My anxiety definitely manifests as concern (often irrational) for my pets. It sucks but it can be managed.