How have your parrots changed your life?

[reeb]

Trigger warning, for anyone who has ever suffered from depression or other mental illnesses - I feel that this is important to share, because I believe the connection between human and bird can be so immense that it can bring wondrous happiness into one’s life. This may be a long post, but bare with me.

I’m not kidding when I say that my birds have saved my life.

I have been diagnosed with Bipolar disorder (3 years ago) as well as generalised anxiety and panic disorder (5 years ago). This basically means that I suffer bouts of deep depression, and crippling anxiety that prevents me from functioning. While I am very stable on my medication and “normal” seeming by societal standards, I still occasionally suffer greatly at the hands of these illnesses.

I have had birds for a few years now. When I was experiencing one of the worst times in my life, I was introduced to parrots, my first little flock of budgies, three of the four who are still with me (from 4 to 22, who would have thought!). They gave me purpose and they kept me going even in the darkest of times.

Around August last year, I was searching for a cobalt/violet show budgie for my flock, and I was lucky enough to find a breeder with babies available. She hand reared two from different sets of parents, and I was only thinking of getting one, to bring into my aviary when he or she was old enough. However, when I went to fetch him (now Opal), I saw his little cage mate (Pearl) who had not been sold yet, and I knew that I needed to bring them both home. So I did. The plan was the aviary with the flock. But I fell in love, and I wanted to keep them inside with me. After about a month, I decided to get a cockatiel too, and I named her Berry.

My aviary birds have always given me a purpose: I have to get up in the morning and care for them every day. my new babies began to help me in new ways last year. I went through times of extreme anxiety, and they would be there when I cried or panicked, like they really understood - they would groom me, fly to me, and even act silly to make me laugh. When I was plunged into another period of depression around November, I felt an all too familiar darkness descend - I felt like I had disappointed my human loved ones, like I didn’t deserve their love (irrational, I know) - but my parrots? I knew that their love was unconditional, that their entire world was me: a best friend, a flock member.

I got up every day for them. I forced myself out of bed, because I knew they were going to be there always to make me happy. I knew I needed to be happy for them. I knew I needed to SURVIVE for them. And so I did. And their love (along with my family and friends of course) pulled me out of this darkness, with the light of their pure and precious souls bringing a bit of joy to me every single day. I am doing much better now. I owe so much of this to them.

I just wanted to share this. I know my life will be forever blessed by this passion for our avian friends: I hope to have parrots with me for the rest of my life, because they have warmed me at my core. They have inspired me. And I know they always will.

Light and love to everyone here - the community has helped me a lot, too.

 

[wrench13]

Funny how animals can touch us so deeply. I became a dog person in my twenties, still am, but after I had my first parrot, Skyler, I was hooked. He must have been a Mexican red front, but he was sold to me as a Red Spectacled amazon. SUper freindly ( even liked my ex-wife!). We were inseperable I've never had the depression the OP talks about, but pleanty bad things have happened to me thru my life. Parrots always made me feel better, forget for a few minutes the crappy hand I was being asked to accept, even made me laugh. They really are feathered angels, even when they are acting their worst. Yep, a lot of work, and $ to take care of them right, but worth every penny.

 

[Soyajam]

I've read quite a few pieces and studies about how pets of all kinds are particularly good for us - most of them center around the benefits to longevity (living longer) but usually all of them talk about benefits to mental health.
A point these articles talk about I made note of, is how they help dispel feelings of uselessness - mental illness is great at degrading your sense of self worth - and in lieu of doing things to help people, caring for animals is a great way to begin feeling helpful, and "worth it" again. It sounds as if you've had that experience too.

I think there is value in their 'distraction' too - a mind focused on cleaning up that giant poop (and the giant smear of pomegranate nearby) is less inclined to focus on things that make one miserable, right?

My parrot has indeed changed my life, and helped me understand more about myself, but not in the way I expected. I thought I'd fall head over heels in love with her the moment she came home but it didn't occur that way.
This caused lots of uncertainty, caused me to ask many questions, and to wonder things about myself (that I'm still working through).
Why did I behave differently to what I expected? What did I hope to happen and why didn't it eventuate? Etc.

She actually had the opposite effect in some ways, making me less sure of myself than before. I don't understand this creature, despite my best efforts, and she keeps me constantly on edge sometimes. Understanding why that is (and to be honest, convincing myself that feeling this is good for me) is part of the challenge.
Few other things in my life have been this... "effective" at provoking introspection - and in that way yes, Remi has changed my life.

 

[Scott]

Thanks for a wonderful thread! I am certain you will inspire others to develop similar relationships with fids.

The beauty of companion animals is they love unconditionally and never judge. I suspect your flock is aware of periodic mood and display variances but accept you as their "alpha" and provider of essentials.

In my world parrots are a refuge from the complexities of humans in every aspect. It is tremendously liberating to spend an afternoon reading, doing chores, etc with one or more on my shoulder.

 

[Carl_Power]

Awww. Ive suffered with depression at times in my life and some anxiety. I had it really bad for about 8 months last year so i know where you are comming from. Id much rarther have a broken bone than have a panic attack. Somehow i came out the other side but it was really hard wow. Im glad your Parrots bring you such comfort and how you guys need eachother. Its a beautiful thing. You know a true animal lover is just the most special kind of person with so many good qualities. I know how depression makes you think about yourself but its the biggest lier in the world. I really sympathise with you but please know the world is a better place with you in it and what a wonderful person you are. Those birdies love you because your you.

As for my Parrot changing my life. He relys on me for so many things and i just love being the person that gets to take very good care of him. He needed a forever home and i get to give that too him. Ive really fell for Parrots since getting him and its made me a better person. I dont have kids but he makes me feel a special kind of love being his daddy and just feel a better person every day. I like to lay down sometimes if im not feeling too great with my favourite music on and i just watch him playing. Its really healing to me x

 

[chris-md]

For me it’s really just always having something to do, and this includes our dog. My mom took both our animals for a week when we went to Spain a few months ago.

The day before we left was completely animal free. And it felt weird. There were fits and starts of “oh, shoot I forgot, I need to feed the dog” or “gotta get the dog out” or “gotta put Parker to bed...oh wait he’s not here”. I looked at my partner and said “it’s so strange how our lives have changed over the last 10 years. You never really notice the life you have crafted for yourself until a big part of it disappears”.

We never noticed until that day just how much of our daily lives revolve around these two animals. And how happy we were that it did.

 

[bigfellasdad]

Yes, totally, and for the better. Ok, pets in general have the plus and negative points but on the whole I wake up each morning and cant wait to interact with Enzo, equally I cant wait to get home from work to see her again. Ive never had any other companion pet other than birds so I cant say id feel the same for any other animal though.

BTW, my favourite intellect and atheist is Stephen Fry, who is also bipolar and also of course an English man.

 

[Allee]

Robyn, thank you for this sweet thread and for sharing something deeply personal. Obviously, the companionship of parrots has been a positive impact in your life, I'm so happy you are surrounded by a flock of loving, supportive friends. By sharing your experiences you are opening doors for others and offering new possibilities for those in similar circumstances. Thank you!

How have your parrots changed your life?

Parrots are amazing teachers, I've learned a lot.
I can't travel as much as I'd like.
I've become a wizard at budgeting for toys and parrot essentials.
Linguistics, six of my nine parrots speak often and clearly, I'm constantly fascinated by parrot language.
I miss candles, incense and aromatherapy but I can live with it, clean air has its own rewards.
I prefer pushing a vacuum cleaner twice daily over any exercise class and pushing the vacuum only costs energy.

Seriously though, I've struggled with depression throughout most of my adult life due to personal loss and life events beyond my control. I owe tremendous gratitude to the long list of dogs that have walked me through the hardest paths. That said, I've seen my flock work their own special magic and connect with individuals when they need an emotional lift. My mother has various health issues and she also struggles with depression, she comes over to visit my flock and always leaves in a happier emotional state than when she arrived. My Amazon adores her and when she visits he makes her feel like she's the most important person he ever met. Another woman who is very close to me has a panic disorder and has trouble with crowds and social events, including family events, Harry, a female quaker, a notorious rebel with a mean streak seems to understand exactly how to help, Harry's entire demeanor changes when this woman approaches her, she even allows the woman to touch her, she speaks to the girl in a soft friendly voice and sings and whistles with her, the boost to the woman's self confidence is immediate and dramatic, it should be said, Harry is a dangerous girl to befriend, if anyone else tried to touch her, she'd make them bleed.

A number of people have told me how special it is to hear a parrot speak or have a conversation with one or more of them.

Yes, they have changed my life, for the better.

 

[LeaKP]

I’ve had parrots for much of my life, I guess I can say that I couldn’t imagine life without one. I love the responsibility that forces me to think outside of myself. Being a mother and wife (and eek grandma now) has done that for me but a parrot never grows up and leaves home. With a parrot I’m not allowed to only think in terms of me alone, there’s always someone else to consider. I think it’s a good thing indeed.

 

[Sandy19]

I've always had dogs. I have three of them now and it's come to the point that I have to put my 15 year old Newfoundland down. He can no longer get up to pee and poop and I keep putting it off because it's so hard to do. I'm going to have to make the call to the vet soon.

My little Senegal parrot, however, has a good chance of outliving me and then my kids will take her if that's the case. Parrots live a long time and I'm 42 and she's still a baby. She brings joy to my life every day though when the rest off my family are acting like a$$holes.

 

[Jferrand526]

I’m really thankful this post was made. Three months ago now I had gotten Tango and my other birds, almost all of them were given to me, my most recent adoptee is Talia, a sun conure whose parronts couldn’t take care of her because of the noise and now I have a bird room set up for them all to play in. No matter how much they bite me I love all my babies but I have suffered from what my doctor believes to be depression, ptsd, and anxiety. I’ve had severe symptoms of all three since 2008 as a kid because of something that had happened and my old psychiatrist had to move away for his own health. Now, I’m trying to go see another psychiatrist that can hopefully help me out a little more with some of my problems but ever since I got my birds my mind, body, and soul just felt better.

I felt needed by my birds, they make me feel needed everyday by yelling to greet me in the morning and everytime I walk past their bird room. I recently descended into a dark place again and I had went into the bird room and sat down, Tango would bring his toys over to play with me. One by one he would gather the little toys I have for him in my lap. All of my birds had made me feel needed, they all cuddle me when I would actually need a hug and even the normally nippy Echo would behave himself and sit on my shoulder to whisper things in his own language to me.

I love my dogs too but my birds have helped a lot, I think every animal can sense when something is wrong but what some people don’t know is birds can sense that too and once you have gained their trust and friendship there is nothing they won’t do for you. So thank you to my birdies (Tango, Talia, Arrow, Comet, Echo, and Martini) for helping me through difficult times.

 

[Carl_Power]

This is not Parrot related but when i was suffering last year i started drinking alot of Green tea every day, caffine free. I can tell you that it helps tremendously with Anxiety having a few cups every day. Its so good for your mind and body, i hope this helps x

 

[dhraiden]

They've made me worry and obsess about things much more than I already did, haha!

I also tend to feel worse now when I know I'm not giving them the full diligence of care owed (more time, more attention, better diet, rotating in new toys, etc).

So...not really a net positive, hahah..I'd always talked about wanting parrots and then my SO prompted me to buy Mochi from a Pet Supplies Plus back in the summer of 2015, and Mango from the same store the following January.

-But- I have happily observed how much happiness and joy they've brought Brianna, which is quite pleasing..3/4 of all the pictures on my phone are just snaps of the three of them cuddled up together : ) And our home is a much warmer place for their beloved presence!

 

[GaleriaGila]

Well, I'm late to this thread, and I think everybody has done a great job of covering the bases. Well done!

As for me, my 34 years with the Rickeybird has been a wonder. Yeah, he has ruined a lot of things, taken away a lot of opportunities, necessitated living arrangements that I would never have chosen just for myself, terrorized the household... and the money... over the years, I could have bought a nice car with what I've spent on him.

But then, he delights and entertains and touches my soul in a way no other being ever has. When he calls me (gee, I wonder how he picked that up) with a Texas drawl that sounds just like my ol' man's when he yells for me across the house, my heart melts. "Gayyy-ulll!" That's Texan for "Gail!"

Thanks. That was fun!

Great thread. Great responses.