Greiving Parrot Owner

[Dharma1911]

Hello
I'm here because I felt I needed to connect with other parrot owners to express myself in our time of grief. We have owned a Greenwing Macaw for 43 years and he died unexpectedly one week ago today. We are having a very hard time dealing with this loss and I wondered if anyone else had experienced having owned a parrot long term and losing them. He started displaying symptoms of lethargy and making low groaning sounds for a few days prior, although he was eating normally. So I took him to the vet last Tuesday and before the doc could get a gram stain, he was gone. It was just that quick. Doc tried to say it was malnutrition but we fed him very well and weighed him when we brought him home that day. Same weight as he has always been... around 3 lbs. We always thought we would have to put him in our Will. My heart is broken and I am reaching out.

 

[JerseyWendy]

Welcome to the forums.

Please accept my deepest condolences to the loss your beloved GW! I'm choking up over here....

 

[Dharma1911]

Thank you. This is so devastating... I cannot stop crying.

 

[Christinenc2000]

I am so sorry for your lose I can't imagine 43 years WOW

 

[Dharma1911]

Thank you. My husband bought him in 1973 and had him 17 years before he met me in 1988 and we've had him together since then. It is very much like losing a child.

 

[Flboy]

Yes it is almost like loosing a child! Am so very sorry!

 

[2greenconurestostart]

I am so so sorry for your loss. Rest in peace sweet baby. We are glad you are here. Xoxo

 

[wrench13]

Same here, my deep sympathy. I lost my little Max after 15 years, only last year, and will still well up. And I am a 62 yr old hard nose. Comfort yourself that you gave him the best you could for that long, and that he will be among the first to greet you as he flies to you from over the bridge, doing and saying all the things you loved about him.

 

[Kalel]

Sorry for your loss. Sending warm thoughts your way.

 

[DRB]

Sorry to hear your sad news.

I've often pondered why losing a pet often seems to comparable (and sometimes seems more difficult) to losing a loved family member or friend. There probably is no "real" answer or just one answer, but I tend to view it is due to our pets (speaking about most species, as I don't picture fish in this category) being so dependent upon us particularly as the dominant most intelligent species in our shared surroundings. As opposed to the people we eventually lose as we as people grow into ourselves and become so independent and ultimately have the ability to choose. Granted losing a child is most likely the worst thing a person can go through in terms of loss, but I feel our pets (and with birds living so long it adds to the bonding, especially with the vocal capabilities so many have) bond to us in such different way. Then you add the innocence of a pet (so similar to that of a child) as opposed to the loss of innocence we as people all experience (b/c many times we as people contribute to our own demise). Our pets rarely have responsibility nor culpability in their living experience.

Sorry to ramble on but that is how I personally see how easy it is to feel as bad or sometimes worse when a pet dies.

 

[GreatBlue320]

I'm so sorry for your loss. Our first bird, a Black Capped Conure, died after only having her for 1.5 years and we were devastated.

I can't begin to imagine how hard it is for you and your husband after 48 years.

I actually participated in some moderated online chats specifically for those grieving from the loss of a pet at Association for Pet Loss and Bereavement (Association for Pet Loss and Bereavement). It really helped me to "talk" with others who were feeling the same terrible loss. And because the chats are moderated, the talk was kind and supportive.

 

[OOwl]

You are surrounded by parrot lovers here who truly empathize with the grief and loss you feel. It's such a hard thing to suffer alone. I'm so glad you came here. Most of us have lost a beloved parrot at some point. It's said, "Shared pain is lessened." I hope that's true. . .

 

[Allee]

Deepest condolences for the tragic loss of your long time companion. I am so sorry for what you must be going through. Many of us understand too well the kind of grief you are experiencing and your need to talk with a group that truly understands. I'm glad you joined us.

 

[cnyguy]

So sorry for your loss. Many of us here know how hard it is to lose a much-loved companion parrot. In 2010, my Yellow-crowned Amazon George passed away at roughly 70 years old; he was a part of my family for 40 years. I've found that my many good memories of all those years with George are a great comfort to me, and I imagine the same will be true for you. A few weeks after George's passing, I welcomed Ralph the Quaker parrot into my life, and that was an enormous help to me. While Ralph could never replace George, he has filled the empty place in my life left by George's passing.

 

[Dharma1911]

Thank you for your kind post. And you brought up something that I want to ask everyone here and that is how to tell the the correct age of an Amazon parrot. We have always been told that Macaw years are the same as human years but my last vet said my bird was actually more like 70 years in human years, even though he lived for 43 years. Then I recently read online that the first four years of an Amazon parrot are equivalent to 5 years for each of the first four. That would make him 20 human years old after having him for 4 years. So what is correct? I'm getting conflicting information.

 

[Birdman666]

Losing a bonded macaw is like losing a child...

It hurts that much, especially a bird you've had for 40+ years.

I can't imagine the pain of losing Maggie.

 

[cnyguy]

Commonly, the actual number of years a parrot has lived is what's used to reference the parrot's age-- though the equivalent level of maturity may be different. A 2-year-old Amazon may be closer in physical and sexual maturity to a human teenager, but is still two years old.

 

[Flboy]

Losing a bonded macaw is like losing a child...

It hurts that much, especially a bird you've had for 40+ years.

I can't imagine the pain of losing Maggie.

I agree, I have lost both!

 

[Birdman666]

Thank you. This is so devastating... I cannot stop crying.

My most bonded bird ever was a 38 year old blue fronted amazon. I lost her to a tumor about seven years ago. There are times when I still miss her terribly...

43 years is a long time to have a companion. And, like your kids, you expect them to out live you. When they don't, it's a huge loss.

The grieving process is normal. And anyone who hasn't raised one, might not understand. They just don't get how interactive and "child like" these birds are.

 

[Dharma1911]

I thought so... that is what we have always been told and this vet has no idea what he is talking about saying he is really more like 70 years old. We also do not believe he died of malnutrition. We think the vet screwed up and is trying to hide it. He seemed very concerned when we insisted on bringing him back home after he died instead of leaving him at the vet.
Thanks.