Bond forming

[Vivica]

I grew up in a household where my mother beat our golden retriever with a broom, and she'd still come after you and try and play.

Wow, I didn't think when I wrote what I wrote that there were people that actually DID hit their dog with a stick!! You poor thing! That must have been so traumatising! You must have thanked your lucky starts when she didn't end up giving the bird away, and you got to inherit it and finally give it a proper loving home.

Yeah it was pretty sad, but there was really nothing I could do to make her stop. I just had to care for my animals the best that I could. I've had animals all through the years since I was a little girl. I had bunnies (that multiplied), betta fish, turtles, goldfish, guinea pigs, gerbils, hamsters, dogs, a cat, you name it. Not all at the same time though. At one point we got up to twelve animals in the house because the bunnies multiplied.
Needless to say we had to 'get rid' of the bunnies. So my mom took them to the humane society. (they're no-kill)
But yes, I am lucky that my conure, Wrnts, wasn't given away. I would have never forgave her. That was MY baby.

 

[Ladyeclectic]

I think it's hard, when you get a new bird (especially a "wild" one that wasn't hand-reared), to really comprehend exactly how much patience you'll need to form a bond. A week won't do it; perhaps a month later it still won't let you pick it up but will cry for your attention and companionship. I know I had problems my first week with my conure: my brain knew it would take time but my heart seemed intent on establishing a bond - and when over a week later I still couldn't get my hand near, it depressed me. It has had another effect on me however: I'm now determined not to miss the trees for the forest (or vice versa). Focussing on the minor steps - seeing their interest in you, how much livelier they are when you're around, the way they call for you when you step around the corner - and seeing just how precious those steps, however "small", are to a long-lived relationship...

Priceless, and too good to gloss over.

 

[Lorinn]

Thanks VERY much for this post. I think my questions come from total inexperience; I really don't want to do anything to hurt Buddy, or scare him; and I do want to give him all that he needs right now, to make his transition to my home as easy as possible. I will take your advice to heart. : )

 

[HannahW]

Thanks very much for posting this! My husband and I love all of our pets, and we did do alot of research (about five years worth) before we brought Wally home, but as new parents we need reassurance and this was a lovely reminder. Earning trust is never an easy thing, especially from a beautiful animal who has been given up for whatever reason. We are commited to earning his trust, and know he does appreciate everything we do to show him he is part of our family and that we love and accept him for the beautiful fid that he is.

 

[Colorguarder08]

Quantimcats I honestly have to say you are wrong about people who only own dogs and not cats. I have always preferred my dogs over my cats and probably always will. However dogs do not instantly bond with you. They instantly love most people yes but that does not make them bonded to most people. Bonding with a dog is just like any other animal. Only difference is dogs are more willing to bond and trusting. For example Take my almost 6 year old golden retriever Bianica I got her when she was 7 weeks old, She grew up with my dad, my grandma, my brother and of course me. She will let them pet her and love her up if and when they want to however she WILL NOT go to them or even listen to them if I am around. And that is of her own choice if she was bonded to, or even loved, every person as you say dogs do don't you think she would willing go to someone when they call her or sit when they tell her to. As long as I am around she will hear someone else call her name and not so much as look in their direction and that is NOT something I trained her to do she has done it all her life. Now take my dads dog I have taken care of her since she was 12 weeks old and is now 4 years old however that dog and I are not bonded and do not love or even like each other. Now back to birds, I have asked for tips on bonding with mine as I want to make sure I am not hurting the process by what I do. In the two months I have had my birds I have learned that if I miss one day of out of cage time with Halloween I might as well be starting over with her, however I can take her out of the cage get her to step up and sometimes even pet her. Hallows eve on the other hand I am still working on he pays close attention to how Halloween reacts to me if she's ready to come out of the cage I can get my hand up to Hallows Eve but if she decides she does not want to for whatever reason then I can't even put my hand in the cage without him freaking out. It all depends on the animal.

 

[fandy]

I guess I shouldn't be suprised that people think they should get instant love from an animal but they are obviously people that know nothing about relationships. I'm also not suprised that people think they can divorce an animal.