UPDATE: My new baby hated me!

[Emmylou42188]

So I love this forum. I am so excited.

Yesterday was a better day. Daphne, my female baby SIE lunged at me quite a few times, but I kept the men away from her, talked quietly with her and fed her and was there, letting the cage door stay open but not crowding her. When she did lunge, I told her no softly, but didn't pull away from the bites. Eventually, she came to the door, and I walked over to her and gave her plenty of room but offered my hand. At first she was timid and fluffed up, but then she stepped up! She came to me herself and I put her onto her perch and gave her a treat.

I was truly glad to see that she's wasn't afraid. She just didn't want to tolerate someone she didn't trust, but certainly not afraid. She's eating full healthy meals, playing with toys, and not screaming, but the occasional coo.

Today was the ultimate breakthrough. Not only did she let me take her out a few times, When I fed her, she did not lunge at me, not even get close. She ate her food and afterwards, even let me clean her beak. I decided to test touching. The second I started touching her chest lightly, she looked so happy. She just sat there with her eyes shut while I stroked her chest for five minutes.

I just wanted to cry. She really likes me. It's been a few days only and she's doing so much better. She's clearly more comfortable and confident. She loves her food, and now that she learned that I can rub her chest, she looks forward to seeing my hand.

I just wanted to update every one and tell you how happy I am and how much I appreciate that advice and some understanding. It was hard to feel rejection when she took to others in the house because I just immediately fell in love with her the second I saw her, and I wanted her to be happy. I spent more than 8 weeks making sure everything was perfect so she could have a perfect home.

I think she's going to be the most amazing companion bird. Thank you so much, every one. This is a very supportive community. :jumping40

 

[Jtbirds]

Well do you think she doesn't like men? Because I really hope that is not what this is suggesting... They can't tell male and female apart so the must have been a different response from a male figure other then just the fact he was a male....


Glad to hear she is doing great, and welcome to forums! This is a great place so enjoy yourself there is a plethora of knowledge on these forums

 

[Emmylou42188]

No I didn't mean she didn't like men. I meant she took to someone else. It could've been that because he wears glasses or is tall or whatever the reason, she took to him, but she was really aggressive with me. She's so much better though now that she's learning to trust me.

 

[noblemacaw]

I am happy to hear Daphne is doing better. It took me about 3 weeks of intense work for my Eclectus to accept me.

For my situation it took giving him 12 hours of uninterrupted sleep by setting up a sleeping cage in a spare bedroom. I also changed his pellets and performed intense love therapy. I know people are probably going to think I am nuts for the intense love therapy but it really did work. I would wrap him up in a baby blanket ly him on my chest and I would talk and sing softly to him. It took about three weeks but I refused to give up on him.

His greatest gift to me was to be able to be there for him when he was dying. Joaquin waited for me to get to him when in reality he should of died while I was on my way in. I was able to say goodby, to tell him it was okay to go. To help comfort him I held him to my chest and sang to him his favorite songs, the same songs I sang to him during the intense love therapy. These songs always comforted and relaxed him all his life because they were our bond. To this day I cannot sing his song to any other parrot. When Joaquin died he did not die alone and he knew he was loved.

Joaquin took a part of me the night he died but he gave so much of himself helping the depressed and hospice patients feel better and happy. He had a gift of taking their pain into himself and the work he did was something I probably will never see again. His work was miraculous and it was truly a privilege to of been part of it.

I have no doubt the relationship between you and Daphne will become a strong bond. This is because of all the work and dedication you put into the relationship because of love.

 

[Emmylou42188]

Thank you so much for sharing your story. It is so difficult to imagine losing Daphne, even though I've only had her for a few days, so I'm sorry for your loss. Joaquin sounds like he was such a sweet and loving bird.

Just as you said, I am devoting lots of time to her and always talking and interacting with her. I know we'll be the best of friends soon, but as a baby, she is just a bit wary. Thank you for your helpful suggestions. It helps validate that I'm doing the right thing with my new baby girl.

 

[drlisaort]

Glad you and your Daphne are bonding. Yay!!!!

The story of Joaqin made me cry. I sing to Oliver as well and couldn't imagine how very sad it would be to sing the very same bonding songs as the send off song--but at the same time it would be so beautiful. Thank you for sharing your story of love...

 

[mtdoramike]

It was probably because you named her Daphne

 

[Chikoo]

Well do you think she doesn't like men? Because I really hope that is not what this is suggesting... They can't tell male and female apart so the must have been a different response from a male figure other then just the fact he was a male....


Glad to hear she is doing great, and welcome to forums! This is a great place so enjoy yourself there is a plethora of knowledge on these forums

My female definitely notices gender. It may not be something they visually recognize because of some instinctual physiology, but they do notice the energy. My female will fly to and readily sit upon the shoulder of ANY female. She walks right over. With a man, she is VERY different. I have noticed this countless times with strangers, and even between my wife and me. She definitely knows who the ladies are!

 

[Jtbirds]

It's about your presence as you stated... Energy so a female and male have different biological energy persay. She knows a presence about a female not truly that they are female. It could just be a higher pitch, different hormones, different way of preceding themselves compared to a male, but it is never they know what you are.



I am really glad she warmed up and is doing s great!

 

[Emmylou42188]

It was probably because you named her Daphne

You don't like her name?

 

[Jtbirds]

It was probably because you named her Daphne

You don't like her name?

I'm thinking it was a joke