Parrot Jokes

[henpecked]

I saw the recent joke and made me think of another one.

Lady has hen Amazons who cuss and say things like "hey big boy,want to party?". So she ask her priest who has a couple of male amazons about what to do. The priest say's,"bring them over and i'll show them what good boys my birds are, They set around all day praying and playing with rosary beads", So sure enough she brings them over and they decide to put all of the zons in one cage, as soon as the first hen steps into the cage with the 2 male zons, she says"hey big boy, what to party?". The one male looks at the other one and says"Frank, put away the rosary beads, Our prayers have been answered."

 

[Remy]

Okay, this one is kind of naughty.

A man is at a flea market, and a parrot calls him over. "Take me home!" says the parrot.
"What for?" Says the man. "I don't want a parrot."
"Well," says the parrot, "I'm extremely intelligent. I will make an excellent companion to you. I speak several different languages, and I can even read! Pretty good for a bird, huh? I just have one rather embarrassing problem though."
"What's the problem?" asks the man.
"Well, I don't have any legs. I have to hold on to my perch with my weenie." The parrot lifts up his feathers to show the man.

The man thinks it over, and decides to take the parrot home.

One day, the man comes home, and finds the parrot on the ground, in distress. When asked what happened, the parrot tells him, "Your wife is cheating on you! She brought another man home, and was smooching him."
"WHAT?!" says the man. "Then what happened??"

The parrot replied, "I don't know what happened next. I fell off my perch."

 

[mrob]

A man received a parrot for his birthday. The parrot was fully grown, with a bad attitude and worse vocabulary.
Every other word was an expletive. Those that weren't expletives were, to say the least, rude.
The man tried hard to change the bird's attitude and was constantly saying polite words, playing soft music, anything he could think of to try and
set a good example. Nothing worked. He yelled at the bird and the bird yelled back.



Finally, in a moment of desperation, the man put the parrot in the freezer.
For a few moments he heard the bird squawk and kick and scream. Then suddenly there was quiet. Not a sound for half a minute.
The man was frightened that he might have hurt the bird and quickly opened the freezer door.



The parrot calmly stepped out onto the man's extended arm and said, "I believe I may have offended you with my rude language and actions.
I will endeavor at once to correct my behavior. I really am truly sorry and beg your forgiveness."
The man was astonished at the bird's change in attitude and was about to ask what had made such a dramatic change when the parrot continued,

"May I ask what the chicken did?"