never again

[Owlet]

I hope this kind of post is allowed, if not I'm sorry.

Never joining a Facebook group about birds again.
The lack of care for anything but their own amusement in these groups are infuriating.

Case 1: Grown male chicken allowed to interact with a pair of eclectus parrots.
Case 2: Hand feeding a cockatoo... using oatmeal and mashed up veggis. (disclaimer: I don't know much about handfeeding and idk the age of the too but doesn't seem appropriate for a 'formula')
Case 3: This ones my favorite; Someone posted pictures of their conure and dove interacting. And then posted """jokingly""" about how she lets them mate and I promptly posted about how wrong that was and how she was just asking for a injured dove. She rejected what I was saying so I just blocked her and reported the post to the admins, you know what happened? I was temp banned from posting on the group.

There's a lot of other things like grossly small / empty cages, refusal to not let dogs and cats interact with the birds, absolutely sad diets, etc. I've tried talking to some and letting them know what's should change and I'm always always yelled at.
It's so frustrating to see people put these animals that are entrusting US with their lives in senseless danger just for entertainment.


edit: Im sorry all my posts lately seem to be relatively negative, I guess just a lot going on. Lincoln always knows how to make me feel better though. He's letting me give him neck scratches now which is a huge deal for him since he has always been very touch phobic and was quick to let me know that.

 

[charmedbyekkie]

No, thank you for posting this. I've been struggling with something similar and didn't know where to turn to - felt quite alone in trying to learn how to be a good parront.

The groups I've joined tend to refer to having a companion parrot as a "hobby", e.g. "giving up my hobby: grey for sale, $900". And almost every group is perfectly fine with breeders selling away so many birds that are way too young - nobody seems concerned about whether their parrot came from a humane place or whether they're supporting unethical businesses. And many promote just feeding pellets/seeds for eclectus parrots. They just seem to care that the bird looks pretty and can talk! :5_sad:

*sigh, I just wanted to ask them if they knew of local bird rescues I could volunteer at, where I can find a large enough cage of 304 stainless steel, how do they protect their parrots from the pesticide fog.... but I guess that's just how it is. It doesn't help that my name doesn't look 'local' enough.

 

[Owlet]

I couldn't find any groups that were based around my area which I'm almost glad about, I don't think I could bare to live so close to people who just grossly neglect their birds and only see them as toys.

 

[psychocircus91]

I am a member/follow many, many parrot pages. I would estimate dozens of them.

It is a great opportunity to educate IMO. Obviously there will always be people who are unwilling to listen or change, but sometimes just recommending something using kindness can go a long way.

At times, I even learn something, myself.




'One day, an old man was walking along a beach that was littered with thousands of starfish that had been washed ashore by the high tide. As he walked he came upon a young boy who was eagerly throwing the starfish back into the ocean, one by one.

Puzzled, the man looked at the boy and asked what he was doing. Without looking up from his task, the boy simply replied, “I’m saving these starfish, Sir”.

The old man chuckled aloud, “Son, there are thousands of starfish and only one of you. What difference can you make?”

The boy picked up a starfish, gently tossed it into the water and turning to the man, said, “I made a difference to that one!”'

 

[Owlet]

Normally I would agree, but I have tried several times to educate them and they just go on and on about how "wrong" i am because theyve been doing this for years and "my parrot is fine" is it? is it really? Then people always come to their defense like "Shut up let people do what they want, you don't know their bird" like no, i don't but you shouldn't be doing that with a bird.

In short: I have not had a single positive experience with these groups. You can't change the minds if people who simply just don't care.

 

[SailBoat]

And, sadly, neither has the Vet that receive the poor Parrot near death.

For Good or Bad, I'm here because 'Placing the Parrot (Bird) first is an underlining foundation of Parrot Forums'. It is individuals like each of you that support that 'best practice' approach that makes Parrot Forums.

A special thanks to each of you!

 

[Flboy]

The other thing I love is everyone is so thin skinned! If you disagree at all you are rude, then you get blocked!
I was thrown out of an Australian group- still not sure why- for either using the word Aussie, or trying to help find a home for a sweet fid!

 

[wrench13]

I belong to one and only one Parrot related group/forum/board. This one. I have found the members, especially the long time ones, to be knowledgeable, able to offer advice and help in a friendly manner, and have endless patience with the constant stream of new members, who sometimes come to us with parrots who are in need of far more help than a board can offer. Facebook groups often turn into monkeys**t fights, with trolls and people who just love to watch things unravel.

BTW, I follow your posts on Lincoln all the time - congrats on getting past his avoidance of getting scratchies. I know that when I get home from work, I give a big HELLO to all in the house, Salty is the first to answer back with a "Hi Daddy", and after I kiss the wife hello, Salty gets a shoulder ride to my fav chair and gets his hello scratchie.....and the days stresses and annoyances fade away. I hope Lincoln's interaction with you offers the same. Keep up the great work with him.

 

[Owlet]

Yes yes Sailboat I love the "parrot first" mentality of these forums. It's truly the best way to keep such complex animals like parrots. Dogs and cats you have the space to not always put them first. Wanna go on a vacations? Sure there's lots of places that would board a dog or I'm sure you have a friend who could watch them. Parrots? Sometimes risky to board (see the person who had their conure possibly sold from a VET CLINIC while boarding it there for a week), then most people don't know the first thing about parrots so not the best idea to leave them with a friend all the time.

 

[chris-md]

I have to wonder if it’s your approach? I’m only on one other group, an Ekkie specific forum which largely mirrors this forum in the parrot first mentality, and people can be stubborn. If you come off preachy, or lecture out of thin air, people will shut down immediately.

It’s a lesson I’m personally still learning in life, as I’m often accused of being a know it all or being preachy. Not my intent and don’t always know when I’m doing it.

If there’s one thing I’ve learned from my current role, often instead of simply telling people they’re doing it wrong, you have to lead them to your conclusion - start by asking questions, then leading questions.

There’s an art to it.

 

[Cardinal]

I hope this kind of post is allowed, if not I'm sorry.


There's a lot of other things like grossly small / empty cages, refusal to not let dogs and cats interact with the birds, absolutely sad diets, etc. I've tried talking to some and letting them know what's should change and I'm always always yelled at.
It's so frustrating to see people put these animals that are entrusting US with their lives in senseless danger just for entertainment.


.

I find this very sad. Dogs and particularly Cats can be fatal for Parrots, especially the smaller ones. Even if they are peaceful and do not have active hunting instincts like many Persian cats; their saliva is very toxic. But social media is full of such videos and interactions, conveying a very wrong message.

 

[Owlet]

Maybe it is my approach, I won't deny that when it comes to animal care I am blunt especially when there's a possibility of something being injured.

 

[itzjbean]

I too have a few animal groups I am a member of, both to learn, and help educate and of course like the pictures of all the cute pets out there, but there are times I want to smack my head against the wall.

One cat group I was apart of, someone posted a picture of a very very sick kitten and explained the issues it has and how she's trying to help it. It clearly needed medical attention and medical care, so I told the person to take him to a vet. THey replied with saying they didn't have the money for a vet, and others even posted saying not everyone is made of money, defending her decision to not bring this cat in for care. The cat died the next day despite several comments, even one person offered to pay the entire bill for the cat to get him to the vet. Still didn't do it.

There is no shortage of very ignorant people in this world. And just speaking about parrots, there are SO many misinformed people about how to take care of a parrot -- people that think a small budgie cage will fit a cockatiel and they'll be happy for 20 years in the cage, people that feed their parrots peanuts and crackers and unhealthy human foods for their entire life, or all sunflower seeds, or have no toys for their birds.

That's why I just try to remember not everyone knows what they're doing and dn't necessarily have a place to learn such as here, may have just been going on what they were told by a pet store employee. But it sure gets frustrating when people know what they're doing is wrong but don't listen to the advice given. -sigh-

 

[Sunnyclover]

Facebook is the worst. The WORST for parrot groups and information. I quit them a couple of months after I joined them because they people there were not treating vparrots properly and did not seem to want advice and we're not able to give me good advice either. Uggggg. I love this place though...it and it's members are top notch.

 

[Owlet]

When I kept rats, the Facebook pages were horrendous top. I remember there was on really popular one and the admin would advise things that were potentially lethal to a rat but people kept idolizing her and if you disagreed with her that's it you're banned from the group

 

[Scott]

We're lucky with ParrotForums to have an unusually large and well tempered group of members truly eager to assist and develop meaningful relationships. Much harder to accomplish with the more shallow FB format, particularly special interest private pages.

 

[MonicaMc]

If you want good groups, then you need to stay away from the pet ones.... you need to look for breeder groups (although some are against non-breeders joining these groups due to the sheer ignorance of pet owners... I'm actually a member of one, admin approved! *IF* I post, it's questions about what a bird might be, not talking about keeping pet birds), food groups, 911/emergency groups and positive reinforcement training groups.

Those groups tend to have more knowledgeable people in them.



Having said all that, I prefer forums. Easier to search for information, share and talk to others.

 

[EllenD]

I'm so glad that you made this thread, and that I found it!!! I gotta tell ya, it never ceases to amaze me the things people do to their pets, or don't do FOR their pets, but it's much more amazing that they purposely and willingly post these things online for the world to see...with photos! And even sometimes more frustrating than the people who own these pets and mistreat them/don't take proper care of them/neglect them, are some of the Groups/Forums that make YOU the bad-guy for "being critical" of a new member...

This is exactly why I love this Community so much...As with every pet-related forum online, we get many people who sign-up simply because they are having an issue, have a question, or actually have a real emergency with their pet, and once that issue is resolved they never come back. That's very common for ALL pet Forums/Groups. HOWEVER, on this board, in this Community, it's not only alright to constructively tell someone that something that they are doing to/with/around their pet is wrong, but in this Community it's actually promoted to do so!

I will never, ever understand why some Message Boards/Forums/Groups choose to punish their senior-members who are online every day, who help tremendously, who are very educated and experienced, and who simply try to let someone know that the way they are treating their pet or caring for their pet is not okay! I used to belong to a Bearded Dragon Message Board, the largest one on the internet, I might add, that loses more educated, experienced, helpful members for just this reason...

Now don't get me wrong, it's not alright at all to lose your cool and yell at someone, swear at someone, call them names, etc. That's not at all what I'm talking about. But this Bearded Dragon Community approaches everything from the attitude of, and I quote, "If we are negative in any way to a new member who has just joined the community, and only joined the community because they are having a serious issue with their Dragon and they need help, they are more-likely to simply leave and never come back, and then we can't help them. So you cannot be negative towards them in any way at all". That's a quote...And by "being negative" towards a new member, they mean criticizing them or anything that they have admitted to doing or not doing in any way. And they mean it. They are not at all flexible, and the amount of "Warnings" issued to their most senior-members on a daily basis is ridiculous (the mods post the "Warnings" in bold, green or red font, right in the middle of the thread, followed by a PM to the member, and usually a day's suspension)...

I couldn't take it anymore, not because I was taking their little "warnings" seriously, but because I felt like I had no choice, that I was being forced to "coddle" and "walk on eggshells" with anything that I typed...Seriously, I found myself writing things like "Now, I don't want to upset you or hurt your feelings, but you said that you can't afford to buy any UVB light fixture or bulb for your Bearded Dragon, and I just want you to know that this is why your Dragon is dying. So I don't know how you're going to get both a fixture and a UVB tube, but please, you're going to have to try to do so, otherwise he's not going to make it", followed by "I don't know of any home-remedies for Yellow-Fungus, and I don't want to scare you, but Yellow Fungus is fatal a lot of the time, even with the proper prescription medications. And I know vets are expensive, but is there any way you can borrow the money from someone?".....I was ashamed of myself for allowing myself to act like a little dweeb who wasn't allowed to stand-up for what's right...There is nothing at all wrong with saying "I'm so sorry your Dragon has Yellow Fungus, it's a horrible disease, and a tough one to cure. But I can tell you that it's 100% fatal without proper treatment. And while i know vets are expensive, your Dragon is going to die if you don't get him to a Certified Herp Vet asap. So my best advice to you is if you can't afford proper medical care for your Dragon, then you need to seriously consider surrendering him to a reputable Reptile Rescue, as they will get him to their CHV immediately and get him started on treatment right away. I know that's not what you want to hear, but it's not fair to your Dragon for you to just let him suffer like this, and he's definitely going to die if he doesn't get to a vet ASAP. So please, do what is right for your Dragon."....But if I were to post that to a new member who had just started posting due to having this serious medical issue with their Dragon, I would have gotten a warning...

It's ridiculous. I admit that I've had my moments where I've let my passion for animals to get the better of me, and I've said some things that I shouldn't have said, that were just nasty and that I regret....but that is rare, and I've always admitted it when I have. I absolutely refuse to coddle an adult who has taken-on the responsibility of bringing a pet into their home, yet has no ability or intention to provide proper care to them. Not gonna happen! Animals cannot advocate for themselves, so someone has to advocate for them...

 

[buurd]

I found you guys by googling parrot forums and you are at the top of the search. And as a freshly minted bird person, Im so relieved that I found helpful, knowledgeable people to come to for help and for community.

Facebook is a horribly executed idea that went promptly sideways, after launch. In addition to it being unsafe, its been the cause a lot of really bad things, on the micro and macro levels. It's a echo chamber for the lowest common denominator, and a bastion of lies and ignorance. And its also an eyesore.
I really hope its going under soon. The world will be better off without it.

 

[Cardinal]

This is exactly why I love this Community so much...As with every pet-related forum online, we get many people who sign-up simply because they are having an issue, have a question, or actually have a real emergency with their pet, and once that issue is resolved they never come back. That's very common for ALL pet Forums/Groups. HOWEVER, on this board, in this Community, it's not only alright to constructively tell someone that something that they are doing to/with/around their pet is wrong, but in this Community it's actually promoted to do so!

I will never, ever understand why some Message Boards/Forums/Groups choose to punish their senior-members who are online every day, who help tremendously, who are very educated and experienced, and who simply try to let someone know that the way they are treating their pet or caring for their pet is not okay! I used to belong to a Bearded Dragon Message Board, the largest one on the internet, I might add, that loses more educated, experienced, helpful members for just this reason...

.

Yes! I completely agree with you on these counts. I also love this community so much and I am glad I found it.
On the other hand, many other forums and social media (Facebook is one of the worst) are more concerned about pseudo- politeness and do not want to listen to harsh truths even if expressed in the most polite manner.