My cousin is visiting

[roxynoodle]

My uncle called earlier today that he would like to come visit on Monday and bring my mentally disabled cousin with him. On the one hand, I'm glad he gets my cousin and takes her places, because no one else really does. About the only place she goes these days is to Tennessee with her parents to visit her sister. It isn't much fun for her because the grandbabies get all the attention, and she gets jealous. However, my cousin really never likes coming here. First, she hates birds. She won't even go into a pet store if there is a bird in it. Second, she doesn't really like any animals other than cats, so she gets mad about the horses as well. Third, she thinks my house is extremely boring and as soon as she gets here she just keeps saying, "I'm no farm girl!" And then she keeps asking to go home.

What my cousin does like is to go shopping for clothes and purses and shoes, and I'm not much of a girly girl. And my uncle definitely has no interest in that, lol! He wants to go to the big antique mall near me, and my cousin hates that.

I'm kind of dreading this visit. I told him to make sure she understands the birds live here and she will have to deal with them, and not scream at them. I also told him to make sure she understands that she has to smoke outside. She tends to get angry about people having rules like that.

I hope it goes better than other times she has been here.

 

[Mare Miller]

Wishing you luck! Some of my family that comes to visit are dreadful! I don't worry about my bird so much as I do them. Having a mentally disabled person come visit,changes everything. Is there any way you can put the bird cages into one room and close the door?

 

[MikeyTN]

Oh my, your better then me on that part. We threw out the extra bed and made that room into the birdroom so when people ask to sleep over we would say there's no room. Neither one of us likes people staying over....

 

[BillsBirds]

Oh, Roxy... I feel for you. Like Mikey, we don't like people coming for overnight visits. They say you cannot pick your family, just deal with them. Hopefully, things will go smoothly. We also have some "not favorite" relatives. I'm sure that everyone does. Remember that we are here for you to vent & rant, when you need. If we lived closer, I'd offer refuge for you & your birds. We love bird people & their birds.

 

[lene1949]

I am working with intellectually disabled people, and I donated my cockatiel, Tiko, to my workplace... One of the three guys love him.. The other two not so much...

I'm wondering if I did the right thing, because the staff at the house don't even take him out that much... Like the other day, I did a bit of clicker training with Tiko, and then left him on the shoulder of the guy, who really loves him... I was going shopping, but forgot the money, and came back less than 10 minutes later, and Tiko was back in his cage...

I'm currently on a relief line, which means I'm not in the house very much...

I just don't know if I did the right thing... They never paid for the bird, which was intentional on my part, so if they didn't look after him, I could take him back.

 

[antoinette]

I do not know what advise to give you, this is a very difficult situation.
My only bit of advise, try keep the birds away from her.
I know it's easier said than done............
Good luck

 

[roxynoodle]

Yes, usually when she is here, we all go into the living room. The birds live in what I call the front room. BUT, I'm remodeling the living room and it is not suitable for guests right now. The furniture is all wrapped up in plastic, I've torn down wallpaper and I've gouged through the drywall and plaster to add more electric. It is pretty much a mess in there. My downstairs bedroom is filled with some of my furniture projects right now that still need painted and sold, so I can't move the birds in there. I think they would be quite upset if I carted them upstairs (not to mention those cages are heavy when you can't just roll them).

She also has a tendency to not shut doors behind her so birds will stay in cages while she is here. She won't be staying overnight (I don't think, but sometimes my uncle does, so maybe they are). My uncle is on disability as well, so when he comes to visit he does tend to stay for days on end just because he is lonely. He has a mental illness so making friends is hard for him. He is only 4 years older than me, so he was more like a brother when I was growing up. I don't think my cousin will want to stay overnight since she usually wants to go home 5 minutes after she gets here. The only thing she likes here is that I'm a music maniac and have an extensive collection of CDs, and she likes old music for some reason. Although I also like some music from before my time on earth stated, so that's cool.

I'm not sure what her bird issue is. I don't know if they scare her or she just really hates them. My uncle said he told her already several times that I not only still have birds, but I have 3 now, and 2 of them are big. I do know at least she won't try to touch them since she won't go into a store if a bird is in it, lol!

We may just need to be out of the house all day doing other things. Hopefully I will feel up to that, as with my illness I usually don't. And I do have to get Merlin's afternoon meds ready in time for her to get them all eaten by bedtime. So maybe we can go out, come back for me to do the meds, and then go back out again.

 

[roxynoodle]

I'm also hoping Rowdy doesn't sound her alarm screech too long when they first get here. She knows my uncle quite well and doesn't screech at him except for when he first pulls into the driveway. I can't remember when my cousin was last here, so I don't know if Rowdy will remember her. Anyone who has ever stayed for more than a day, Rowdy has gotten to know well enough to know they are safe, and then she is much quieter. People who haven't she sees as "intruders" who might be dangerous.

Pete has not been friendly with visitors so far. But, at least he is quiet about it. Merlin seems very wells socialized so as long as my cousin is fairly quiet and not seething hatred at her, I think Merlin will be ok about it. Unless Rowdy keeps sounding the alarm; Merlin can't see so she relies on Rowdy to tell her there is danger.

 

[roxynoodle]

Well, we survived. We are all happy she's gone now though. The birds all started talking and eating the second they left.

She was so scared of the birds she refused to walk on the floor like a normal person. So she was trying to walk across all my furniture and falling down all over, which of course was scaring the crap out of the birds, too. Rowdy pretty much screamed the entire time she was here. Pete was fairly quiet and not assertive, which was good because she most afraid of him. For some reason she decided Merlin might be ok. So I did get her to wash her hands, and come near Merlin's cage, but in the end she was afraid to pet her. But, it helped Merlin that she came closer and nothing bad happened, so she relaxed a bit. And I think it helped my cousin to get that close to a bird and see it isn't a monster. And Merlin did a few imitations for her, which she thought was funny. She especially liked Merlin's "fart" imitation and did it back to her. So it's a start.

But, we are all relaxed and much happier now that the visit is over!

 

[BillsBirds]

See, you survived, as I knew you would. It is difficult having guests that are afraid of birds. I have to warn potential visitors because there are cages in just about every room in my house. So, if they're afraid of, or don't like, birds...it's. "Where shall we meet for lunch?"

 

[mnkeastman]

glad that it is over and went ok for you, and she even had a positive bird encounter so maybe it will help out in the future when you have to entertain again.

 

[roxynoodle]

I was quite surprised when she said, "Put that cat away and let that Merlin out." Merlin actually wouldn't come out, lol! But, she relaxed a bit when my cousin finally came closer and they "talked" to each other a bit. Merlin kept stepping up, then stepping back down onto her perch. After they left she came out.

So Merlin was the good will ambassador for whatever reason. Maybe her coloring was less frightening to my cousin, or maybe because she was quiet and sitting on her back perch, and thus seemed less aggressive than Rowdy and Pete, who were in the fronts of their cages and interested in who this person was. When Pete started laughing with us, my cousin nearly jumped to the ceiling.

 

[antoinette]

We all learnt something here....... everyone is capable of loving birds, in their own unique way.
Glad it's over for your sake tho, and for the birds....

 

[lexx510]

Glad that all went well for the most part, Roxy!