Mother-In-Law w/Good Intention, Bad...Bad...Bad

[mantellas]

So my Mother-in-law now knows that we will be getting a bird. She isn't familiar with pets, so she has no idea what an African Grey is. Over the phone last night she told my husband that she bought a cage for our bird...this is not a good thing. She likes to buy & resell random...VERY RANDOM...used items. There's nothing wrong with that for some things, but I need to know where a cage comes from for the safety of the bird. Who knows where she obtained this cage from. After my husband attempted to explain to her that the bird we're getting is large and won't fit in a parakeet cage she decided that she's going to get us another bird. She's going to get one that can go in the cage that she picked out for us next time she's in Mexico. She's also very proud that she picked up a cage that is painted with oil paints :11:, which she is under the impression is great for birds. Her & I do not speak the same language so I can't communicate with her. My husband tries, but she's elderly, stubborn and not the best at listening. I hope she doesn't someday bring us a foreign bird from who knows what environment, with who knows what kind of health problems, stuck in a toxic cage. She has good intentions....but oh my goodness, she doesn't have a clue what she's doing. She hates pets, so I don't know why she's suddenly decided that she wants to help out with a bird and even possibly bring new ones into our home. At least customs will stop her if she tries to bring a foreign one in.

 

[mtdoramike]

Grandmothers are like that. They want to help. My grandmother used to tell us kids that she loved grandkids because she got to spoil us and then send us home hahahaha. Please what ever you do, don't discourage her from trying to help out. There are remedies for everything. Like, take the cage, then when she's not around, buy a NEW cage and tell her later that there was an issue with the cage so you had to replace it, but thank you for the offering though.

If she does bring you back a bird from Mexico, which I would think would be very hard with quarantine laws like they are, but if she did, make sure you quarantine the new bird for a period of 30 days.

I do applaud her for showing an interest and hopefully, this might get her into liking pets.

 

[mantellas]

I am glad that she's taking some interest in the bird. She also seems to like our Great Dane, but doesn't want to admit it. She's in excellent health even though she's elderly. She will run and play with the dog, but then afterwards tell my husband how ugly she thinks our dog is. She brags to her friends about the dog. So, somehow she seems to be changing her view of pets, which I'm happy about. Her 'help' can be scary though.

 

[PrettyInInk87]

Lol! That sounds like my mom... She HATES animals all together but when they came and visited, she was VERY intruiged (spelling?) by my snakes, Chameleons, Geckos, and Tarantulas. She even wanted to watch them eat! Which was very surprising to me as she would always tell me I was crazy for keeping these types of pets. She won't hold them though...

Also, you'd be surprised as to how security is at the border. They do try their best not bashing on anyone but there are always those few bad eggs in the bunch who don't care. I live in San Diego 15 minutes from the Tijuana border and have crossed MANY times and can tell you I could probably smuggle a Parrot in my pocket, lol! Never tried and never will.

Bless their hearts though, grandmas are great but can be a handful at time.

 

[merlinsmom13]

I told my granny that I would like a egg plate. She was a flea market bug, she bought one every time she went. I have 6 egg plates. I laugh every time I run across one.

 

[mtdoramike]

I am glad that she's taking some interest in the bird. She also seems to like our Great Dane, but doesn't want to admit it. She's in excellent health even though she's elderly. She will run and play with the dog, but then afterwards tell my husband how ugly she thinks our dog is. She brags to her friends about the dog. So, somehow she seems to be changing her view of pets, which I'm happy about. Her 'help' can be scary though.

That's cute. I also tell my daughter that her Boxer dog has a face that only a mother could love and the only reason the other dogs would play with him is because she hung a pork chop around his neck. But you know, I wouldn't take a dollar and a quarter for that old dog.

 

[Amber]

My greatgrandma does similar things. I wore one of her beautiful vintage (in pretty much new condition too) skirts one, said how I loved it and she came up with a bunch of them for me. She's a champion.

She also rags on Alex, calling him a 'silly bird' and such, but she loves him to bits.

I guess the best thing to do is to take the bird and cage, provided you have the time and want of another bird, and like others have said just say something was wrong with the cage and you needed to replace it. Or as much as I hate to say, purposefully break a latch or door on it or something. Maybe use it to hold a floral arrangement like people do with those little tiki cages when she comes around so she sees it being put to good use and knows you appreciate the gift.

 

[suebee]

lmao....... i am so glad i don't have this problem but awww it must be nice for the old dear to be wanting to help out etc!

you never know she could end up bringing back the perfect king cage, an ends up being an excellent bird sitter in the future! (though i won't rule out her trying to give it a purple rinse, to brighten up your gray)

please keep us up dated!

sorry i gotta add this lol, she could bring you a live chicken, killin 2 birds with one stone lol along the lines of, *its a bird, but if not the right one, its dinner!

 

[critterman]

Well at least she is trying to come around. But if you don't like the cage just get another larger one and tell her the cage she got was too small or just not right. If she doesn't understand and gets offended I suggest you list her on line and sell her to the first bidder..............lol. Just kidding!

 

[lene1949]

I am glad that she's taking some interest in the bird. She also seems to like our Great Dane, but doesn't want to admit it. She's in excellent health even though she's elderly. She will run and play with the dog, but then afterwards tell my husband how ugly she thinks our dog is. She brags to her friends about the dog. So, somehow she seems to be changing her view of pets, which I'm happy about. Her 'help' can be scary though.

I would love to know how 'elderly' she is...???

 

[oled]

lol, what a Mother-in-law

 

[YNAMomma]

I know thats frustrating too. When i tried telling my mom we were getting a bird she tried buying all these bird toys for me ( Budgie toys to fit in the budgie cage she bought me) An as my info says we got Amazons. It took bringing her over and showing her the birds before she went, " HOLY CRAP THOSE ARE BIG BIRDS" then stopped buying us stuff. She still though buys my son ungodly amounts of sugared foods and MT DEW... and then sends him home on a SCHOOL NIGHT! I think she is punishing me for being a pain in her tush when i was little... sigh. So i totally feel for you dear!

 

[Kawaii]

I hate to come off as rude, but… wow.
She's almost "bipolar" about pets in an unusual confusing way. Yes, bipolar is a strong word, but she's basically night and day when it comes to animals.

I wonder if she says those things out of Jelousy… or. . . maybe she just really hates pets? Well, at least she's trying to help… right?
Wow.

 

[coral1]

my great grandmother wont buy things for my pets but is intrested in them and then complains about me and my pets to my grandmother (i live with my grandma shes my legal gardian) my grandma loves all of the animals except marty my parrot but hes an evil little booger who attacks her so i dont blame her and my dad who also lives with us hates them all but when hes in my room will say hi to marty and tell marty he wants to cook him for dinner -.- he also recently got rid of my dog just because he didnt like it. hes a horrible person who doesnt like animals?! D:

 

[Kawaii]

Wow, that's awful that you dad wants to cook our bird… but then again, my father accidentally killed my last lovebird. I felt so bad for him though, he was crying… which was also terrifying unreal at the same time. Haha.

So sorry your dad got rid of your dog though That sucks.

How many animals do you have I wonder, it sounds like a number of them…

 

[TurquoiseMel]

That's cute. I also tell my daughter that her Boxer dog has a face that only a mother could love and the only reason the other dogs would play with him is because she hung a pork chop around his neck.

Laughed to hard when I read that ! LOL.

Anyway I think it's nice of her try to help. Don't let her stress you too much, just find ways to laugh it off.

I second the idea of breaking a latch or a door or something & then loose a piece of it so it's unfixable hehe C:<

& don't take her calling your dog ugly so seriously, it's probably out of love, or jokingly. Hispanics are like that. Me & my mom regularly greet our cat with a "Mi negro feo!!!" (my black ugly boy! sometimes we even add "fat" lol) then smush his face with kisses (in case anyone's wondering, he is in fact black lol) It's not really a big deal, in all likelihood it's probably just something out of fondness for your dog especially since you said she runs around & plays with him. There's a language barrier, so while the words mean the same thing the meaning is somewhat different, if you catch my drift. Kind of like how it's acceptable to call a dark skinned person "Negro/Moreno" in Latin countries while in our country people would take offense or call you a racist. It's just different.

To me it seems like she really is trying to do well by you guys & trying to help. I say embrace it. & maybe pick up a little Spanish, even little words like "muy chicito" (haha for explaining what's wrong with her cage) I think she'll appreciate the effort even if your not great at it, just like she's making an effort for this bird even tho she's not so great at it LOL.

Good luck !!