I scared my bird

[BrownHeadMom]

Hello,

I have had a brown head parrot for 2 years now. He is a wonderful boy who is super cuddly and trusting. Recently, he has been a little nippy and temperamental but generally still quite nice. Today, I gave him a shower and I asked him to climb onto my hand so I could work out some of his pin feathers as he was all wet. Sometime during this interaction, he bit the finger I was petting him with. I scolded him softly, with a No (not in an aggressive tone) then he bit the finger he was standing on quite hard. I was surprised and since he wouldn't let go, I brought down the hand he was standing one by a few inches to destabilize him so he'd let go. He fell to the floor and started screaming and flying around my room, hitting walls as he went. I got him back on my hand, and he would just scream non-stop. Whenever I try to touch him, he screams and flies away crazily.

I know that I was too firm in my movement which scared him and I know for now that he is scared I will hurt him. I put him back in his cage and now he screams whenever I move to approach it.

I wanted to know if anyone has experience with gaining back a parrots trust. How long should I withhold interaction to let him calm down? I really love this bird and I feel so stupid to have let my surprise in our interaction undo all my training about positive (NEVER negative) reinforcement with parrots. It was a terrible mistake, but I really just want to be able to gain his trust again somehow.

I know my interaction with him was wrong in this case, I feel so guilty. Please no negative comments on this, I really need help to go forward.

Thank you all!

 

[LordTriggs]

give him some time to calm down from this and just try chilling out with him. He'll pick up on your tension which will make him tense too and more liable to be scared.

once both of you are calm just start re-offering some treats and let him remember you're a good friend.

In future what might be better than doing the shaking thing, as I've often heard of it ending up with them latching on to keep themselves stable. What a few of us here do is when a bite happens we immediately give a 'no' and then place them down wherever we are and turn our back on them for a minute or 2, then after that go back to whatever was happening. Unfortunately bad attention is still attention for a parrot, but shunning them gets rid of the thing they really want which is attention

 

[BrownHeadMom]

Thanks for the response, LordTriggs. When do you think I should try approaching him in his cage again with treats?

I'm quite afraid that he will never forgive the negative association he made to me.

 

[LordTriggs]

just do so slowly and let him decide how close he wants you, he could decide after an hour he's fine again, or it could take a couple days of sulking and feeling sorry for himself. A singular moment is highly unlikely to completely demolish the trust you've built so I wouldn't panic

 

[ChristaNL]

Parrots are usually quite forgiving, its the guiltridden humans who signal them that something is "wrong" and so the birds get nervous again and behave weird.
It is a great way to strat a vicious circle or negative spiral, do not go there.
You both deserve better than that.

-> the human is behaving abnormally means "something is very. very wrong" to a bird.


Just be your usual carefree self- and the bird will know it is allright, and go from there.



We all make mistakes (and the bird started it by biting - so he deserved a bit of a fright/ scolding ) and now he may have learned something...
that something is far more likely to be: "if I bite fingers... I get in trouble" than the one you fear ("he will never ever trust me again")


You bonded with your bird for 2 years, one silly mistake cannot ruin that completely.

 

[Scott]

Welcome, sorry to hear of your situation. Completely agree with all of the above, parrots typically don't "walk away" from lengthy relationships.

For now his cage is a "safe zone" but you ought gently approach with favored treats. You may find some additional tips from this thread: http://www.parrotforums.com/general-parrot-information/49144-tips-bonding-building-trust.html

Good luck, please let us know how this develops!

 

[noodles123]

I have scared mine before. Sometimes it takes weeks if it is a bad scare, but I think they still care...Mine got REALLY mad at me fore leaving town for 3 days (left her with my parents whom she likes).


Anyway, start back at the basics and basically treat your bird like you did when you first got him...It won't take more than one to two weeks before your friend is friendly again.

 

[BrownHeadMom]

Thank you all! I came home after a few hours and he still screams as I approach his cage or when I speak to him. I’ll take it back to the basics, letting him get used to me being close to his cage without asking anything of him.

Im glad to hear that you all think it’ll work itself out in a few days/weeks. I’ve never seen him act like this towards me or any one... it really makes me feel like he thinks I’m the devil! I’ll keep going slow, getting him used to me again.

I’ll keep you posted on our progress!

 

[LaManuka]

How old is your brown-head? Gorgeous bird by the way!

I’m just wondering if there may also be a sexual maturity and/or hormonal thing going on here since you said he has been nippy & temperamental before the shower incident. Or if he’s going through a heavy moult that may also have him feeling irritable. You may need to factor that into your dealings with him over the next few weeks or so.

The shunning method works way better with a bitey bird than the shaking hand or “earthquake” method - I found that just made a bird latch on and bite even harder!

Either way I’m also pretty sure this will blow over and you will be forgiven so don’t beat yourself up too badly

 

[Laurasea]

I kept forcing my GCC Ta-dah into a flight harness, completely wrong of me and a lack of education on my part . This was a few years ago. It took me every bit of six months to earn her trust back!!! But to this day she will not let me touch her wings ... I hope it doesn't take you that long but just to let you know you can iver come this.

 

[Mitchan]

I think this thread I wrote a while back might give you some insight into your situation as well and some tips on how to proceed to a neutral ground between the two of you again! <3
http://www.parrotforums.com/behavioral/75820-figuring-out-sudden-change-behavior.html

 

[Sunnyclover]

Uhhhh wow. So there have been SOOO MANY times I thought for sure I'd ruined everything with my birds. I once accidentally slapped my sun conure to the floor (don't ask) and he got over it. You just have to make sure you stress the facts that good things are happening when you're around or your hands are around them and soon they'll forget what happened for the most part. Give extra treats and hold it for longer while they take it from you and pet them on the head a bit whilst you feed them. Try to eat food together and share... perhaps just carry them around for a bit and give them a chance to get over it and don't touch them a bunch. Luckily my birds easily forgive and have never really been mad at me for long. I'm sure you and your bird will be okay.

Oh and one more then ... When something like this happens I never wait to interact with my birds. I hold them even more and act totally normal about it and most of the time they follow my lead and there is NO fallout. I definitely wouldn't just leave your bird alone with no interaction after an accident like this. However, if you're leaving them alone and ignoring your bird because they bit you that's fine but make sure not for too long. Birds don't understand why you punish them if you leave them too long.

 

[BrownHeadMom]

My boy is turning 3 soon! It could well be his hormones kicking in, but he's only been nippy for a few days. As for his moult, he went through it a few months ago.

By this time in the day, he no longer screams when I speak to him or move around the room. He sits in his cage, plays and preens as usual. However, he has not said a word or attempted to interact with me other than looking at me intently as I move around. By his body language, I don't think he'd be very responsive to climbing up on my hand. He still seems anxious at my presence, but I'm trying to keep my interactions with him from outside of the cage as normal as usual!

Baby steps, I suppose!

 

[LaManuka]

Aha I thought you must be in another Commonwealth country cos you spell “moult” with a “u”

My (recently departed & desperately missed!) little green cheek conure turned into a complete terrorist when he became a rooster. I couldn’t get near him for 3 days all of a sudden, it was like someone flicked a switch & my sweet darling cuddle buddy turned into Freddy Krueger with a taste for my blood! And this was long before I discovered this forum so I had NO idea what was going on... I just thought he hated me all of a sudden & I was heartbroken!

This may or may not be a factor in what’s going on for you but your boy is around about the right age. Like ChristaNL & Sunnyclover suggested, try to keep your interactions with him more or less normal, although if he’s hormonal he may want to have a bit more time to himself for a little while.

And keep a supply of Band-aids close by....

All the best to you both

 

[GaleriaGila]

Great advice above throughout this thread. And good for you, for caring so much, and reaching out.

The Rb and I have been through many set-backs... we always just start over from wherever we are and go from there. He has vivid dreams/nightmares, and I truly believe he wakes up sometimes and doesn't know that whatever he dreamed wasn't real. Maybe I pulled his tail in the dream. lol But he just wakes up mad.

Anyway, it's a journey, isn't it?

I'm glad you're here.

 

[Scott]

The only real setback I've had is with my closest bonded Goffins, Gabby, age 23. He endured a horrific moult and hormonal overload two years ago. My sweet and cuddly buddy became a biting tyrant. Took him to the vet for a checkup; no abnormalities. CAV suggested a light clipping to calm his mood, and it worked like a charm! Feathers grew back and he emerged from his "Pon Farr" sweeter than ever with no recurrence.

 

[BrownHeadMom]

Thank you all for the encouragement and advice! I may try to clip his wings a little if he starts another flying fit!

We made some great progress today. I got home from work, offered him a treat through the bars, and he came to get it from my fingers! A few hours later, I heard him saying a few tentative "Hello"s from the back of his cage. When I went up to him, he did his usual "give me scratch" head tilt. I opened the cage and he stepped right up! He didn't seem to actually want a scratch though, as he got nervous when I tried. It seemed like he wanted to bite. I put him on his perch, giving him a treat for stepping down calmly. Once he was done, I brought him back into his cage with a perch since he was still a little nervous around my fingers. Now, he's back in his cage whistling up a storm!

He may be a little nervous/territorial/hormonal, but he's definitely looking a lot more like the buddy I know and love! I couldn't be happier!

 

[LaManuka]

Good to know your relationship is on the mend!

 

[Scott]

Most excellent update! Expect continued progress!!