help!!!

[michelle_brown_uk]

Hi - i majorly could do with some advise!!!

I say i rescued my yellow crested amazon as when i had her she was in a budgie cage (didnt discover her wings until a few months of having a nice new big cage!). She was dull in colour and starting to pluck from her chest.

Anyways......

Over two years ago my boyfriend had to work away for 6 weeks. Initally they were best friends but i think she thought he abbandoned her cause ever since she has HATED him.
She generally dislikes him all the time, she sits on the floor guarding him whilst frowning, she will flap her wings and launch forward with a bite if he moves, she will fly across the room to attack him on occasions (she has bouts of this and its normally if i go out of the room!), as soon as he puts his trainers on to go out the back she is on him like a yorkshire terrier!!! She seems to shout when hes not in work as if to say 'that mans in the house again' . She will however sit on his lap and be stroked on the head (but like a guard dog as she will have him if he moves), she will take treats off him but he has to be very carefull as she is cunning and will get him as close as she can so she can get his fingers instead and she will also get him to stroke her head with his toes on the floor.
Its all very difficult as she wasnt tamed as youngster and she is about 30 years old now. We have tried letting her take her anger out on him whilst wearing a leather jacket and she wouldnt stop going round and round his arm biting. Shes not messing either - she puts all her feathers up, shows her red bits on her wings etc. and a lady who breads parrots said she is a parrot holding a major grudge!

She has good diet of pulses, mixed nuts, corn on the cob sticks, fresh fruit.

I think i have wrapped it up as short as possible - also im sure it was whilst he was away that the sick guinea pig i was looking after (that she became friends with and groomed as it was long haired) died.

Does anybody have any advice? i know we can get on with it at the moment but i dont think its very clever to leave her behaviour as she will be around for a long long time yet. i think she might of been abused by a man possibly when she was younger as she doesnt like them much especially if they have very short hair (ie when i shave my boyfriends hair to a short length she hates him even more!!!).

I really dont know what i can do anymore - would another parrot/budgie friend help? (not allowed to ger another fury friend:02

any advice would be greatly appreciated - im even thinking about the pet shame show as long as i dont have to take her to the clinic as that would be impossible!!

 

[HRH Di]

Wow, tough situation you have here. I don't think I'm qualified to give any advice on this one - I'd hate to give advice that would make it worse.

We were bird sitting a cockatoo a while back who did the same thing to our eldest son. We never were able to fix that but since he was only with us on a temporary basis, we were able to work around it.

I will, however, offer my whole-hearted support from across the pond. I know it isn't much, but, as I said, I don't want to give the wrong advice.

 

[michelle_brown_uk]

hey, no worries! thanks for the support!
hes the one who mainly gives her the treats too as i know that is meant to help, unless you got a bird with a mjor grudge like mine - hahahaha!!! he cant do her normal food and water as she would rip his arm off :15:

 

[wildheart]

Welcome to the forum.

If you are really thinking about getting her a friend then PLEASE read this first:
Should I Get My Bird a Companion?
Bird Information

You say that the change happened 2 years ago, how long did you have her before that? I dont think that she hates him now because of what happened to her in the past, if she was abused by a male then she would have hated him from day one, I think. Were they very good friends before he went away for the 6 weeks?

If its been like this for 2 years already then I think you can only accept that it will stay this way.

My husband can only come near my parrot and me when he wares a hat or a hoody, but he is not allowed to touch. She HATES him and will go to great extends to do him harm if he comes too close, he is not allowed to touch her or touch anything that belongs to her. We accepted it and we work around it. She is like this with ALL men and black people.

I dont think there is anything that you can do to change your parrots mind, you can only accept it.

 

[michelle_brown_uk]

We had her about 2 years before he went away and as i stated they were best of friends. She was wary/not friends with him at first like with all men but then became best buddies with him. I only think she might of been hurt by a man as she is aggresive to all men at first but if a lady goes up to her or a young boy then she is fine.
It is all down to him working away this hatred thing i just thought id mention the man thing to try and include as much information as i can to see if theres anything anyone can think off that could help.

I know its proberbly going to be the way for the rest of her live but i would like to try and resolve things as she is very dangerous with him. He cant go near her or she will attack him. Only if he is sat on the sofa and she comes over to guard him/climb up to have a stroke is really the only times he can get near her but then this is a very closey monitered activity as if he moves she will attack! as soon as he walks in the door from work (im normally in before him) she will be on the floor like lightening making these deep gurrr noises and getting ready to attack - unfortunatly its not as simple as not going near her for him! When shes in her fly attacking modes he can be on the other side of the room to her and if i exit the room she will fly across and attack him!!

Oh also if im close to her or storking her and my boyfriend comes too close she will bite me instead and i mean HARD - not just a peck cause she often enjoys play fighting with me so i know her pecks - a proper slice your finger blood everywhere bite :17:

PS. i will read those weblinks thank you when my internet stops playing up cause they wont load for somereason!!

 

[wildheart]

We had to clip my girl's wings because she flew at everybody and attacked them in the face.

I know clipping is horrible but sometimes it is the only solution. During this time it is much easier to handle her and to form a bond. If clipping did not work or made any difference then you can just let the wings grow out again.

What happens when he approach with a hat on?

It is just suggestions, I dont know the answers, I am just trying to think with you of how to resolve your problem or at least just make it easier.

 

[michelle_brown_uk]

She only has the outbursts of fly attacking (only with my otherhalf) apart from that its all footwork! other people are fine as long as they dont try and stroke her!
I couldnt imagine trying to clip her either unfortunatly cause its a major problem just trying to clip her nails when needed as shes not tame to hold - she wont stand on your arm or anything like that which i have tried teaching her but she just growls like a dog (used to live with a dog) and bites and runs off around the cage! shes goes into that crazy mode they do when you try and do her nails too - we've managed to do them 2wice i think - luckly her posts keep them down otherwise i would have to invest in a little parrot straight jacket :04:! Also shes not a very good flyer either i would say she can only fly like a bird with clipped wings anyway to behonest as when we first had her she didnt know she had them due to the size of her cage! once shes managed to flap across the room shes ka-pooped cause she would rather walk/trot everywhere!

He wore a hat the one time and she was an even angrier birdie about the situation! lol! (got to laugh about it or youd cry!) We've tried all sorts of things (bar womans clothes hahaha!)

I know, thank you for the suggestions/help its just a twice as difficult situation due to her not being tame enough to pick up! Its good though these questions and answers cause if we cant get anywhere between us at least maybe if there is an expert out there reading this they can see all the things that have been tried etc!
Its so hard - my only solution that i could think of left was to get her a friend possibly cause i thought mayby the other bird could teach her

 

[wildheart]

Seeing that the page does not want to open for you, I'll post it here:

Should I Get My Bird a Companion?

Written by Grace, Pootspete

Well, what is the reason for your question? Do you just want your bird to have a friend in the same cage (after quarantining)? Do you see your birdie just sitting there in its cage all by its lonesome, talking and chirping, but you feel your birdie is lonely? There are some important things you need to consider. For example, do you feel you do not have enough time to spend with the first bird? If so, are you prepared to spend even more time with having two birds? Yes, more time, not less. You cannot rely on your second bird taking care of your first bird. You will still need to interact with your birds, and you will have a bit more responsibility with taking care of an additional bird, i.e. more feed, water, toys, cleaning, grooming, additional vet visits, etc.



A lot of individuals have just one bird and the bird can lead a very happy life alone. Birds can amuse themselves to great lengths, with having interesting toys to play with in their cages and other items of amusement. The interaction that they have with you too inspires them. You could have your bird accompany you to the bathroom in the mornings, where if trained, can perch on your shoulder or a simulated perch that you set up and watch you shower and get ready for the days activities. You can also have other things planned for when you return at night. Having a television, or radio playing in the back ground also stimulates them to talk and listen while you are away at work. Having a CD with a tropical rain forest theme playing I would think is interesting as background noise. With all that being said, there are still those, like you and me, who have or want to expand our bird population in our homes.


If your only desire is for your present bird to have a companion and live the rest of its life with another bird, then that is fine. Just make sure that you have an adequate cage that will support both birds living together comfortably or in separate cages side-by-side and preferably having the same sex birds.



Please keep in mind before purchasing another bird the possibility that the birds may not like one another and will not get along even after careful introduction. But, if you have other things in mind such as breeding, then please see the article on Breeding in the Bird Information Section.



If you're attempting to train one or both birds, let me share a bit what you may encounter with having more than one bird. It will be much more difficult to try and train one or both of the birds when they have been and remain together. I am not saying that it is not impossible, but it will be much more difficult and will require more patience and stamina from you.
I have two budgies a male and female around the same age. They were not introduced to one another until after a year or so went by. They lived in separate cages in separate rooms and were aware of one another, as they would call back and forth daily, but never laid eyes upon each other. Some may think this is cruel, but I wanted to be able to train at least one of my budgies for myself. In that year's time I was able to train my male who would fly to me, talk to me and bond eventually with me. You can find out how to train your birds more fully in the Bird Information Section.


When I finally introduced the two of them, they interacted with one another. Surprisingly I found out that the male, which I trained, still flew and mingle with me also apart from his own kind. I really did not expect that to happen, as I thought once they were among their own kind, it would be difficult to divide. Needless to say, my training was not in vain and I was very pleased with the outcome. They still sleep in separate cages and are in different rooms. I let them out daily together, and my male will fly to me if I call to him, or come on his own, which is very encouraging to say the least.



In a nutshell, there was a benefit to training my male budgie alone. You may detect some of the one-to-one relationship you had with your bird gone, but in the long run you can still have both, your bird responding to you and to its own kind when and if you decide on getting another bird for your present birdie!
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>


Plus very important, if you do decide to get a companion then the new bird must be quarantined first.

 

[michelle_brown_uk]

thanks for that, it managed to open for me in the end so i read up about the clipping too.
My mate breads and owns a parrot shop see and he cant even get her to stand on his hand/arm! so i was thinking possibly if i did and they didnt get on he might take it back. dont know its just a possible solution - ideally id like to get her a new guinea pig friend but im not allowed lol!
i'll see if anyone else possibly has some advice on the whole situation before any mind making cause i dont know if it would just make things worse and i wouldnt want to do that

 

[SharonC]

It sounds as if the bird has chosen you, and doesn't want your partner anywhere near you. I've a Linnie who hates my husband. He's not capable of doing much damage, although I suppose the principal is the same. We've tried having hubby give all the treats, talk softly, handle regularly....It has improved, to the point that Levi will tolerate him, but I don't think they'll ever be buddies! LOL! You may just have to work around it, and accept it. If it were me, I would clip, to avoid the risk of injury for your partner. I actually clipped my Amazons flights...it's not as hard as it seems....

 

[michelle_brown_uk]

Pain in the bum init! lol!!

Ummm, i think she has chosen me yes but her relationship has always stayed the same with me and she will not even sit on my lap (whereas she will sit on partners lap like a guard dog). She does get annoyed with him if hugs me or tickles me etc or if i shout at him shes like yeah let me at him! lol! But then like i said before if shes angry with him and im close she will not hesitate to bite me instead!
I think it is just a case of accepting it but i thought mayby if i posted on here possibly there might be a solution somewhere out there!
With regards to clipping my mum used to have pet calling ducks so we used to clip their wings all the time so i know whats envolved etc. again though im not keen on it. she cant really fly properly anyway, shes flys as if there clipped and if you see from the below article all clipping does is restrict them.
Wing Clipping
I wouldnt want to take the little bit away from her either for the occasional fly attacks as i believe her life before me as far as im aware she was kept in that budgie cage so for nearly 30 years she didnt even know her wings were there
Also its not an easy job due to her not being tame (literally the only thing you can touch on her is her head, EVERYTHING else is out of bounds) for example on the rear occasions that we have to try and catch her and do her nails shes not a happy bunny, we can only catch her ones shes exhausted from running away from us and still then she tries to eat us cause we are handleing her (in many many tea towels that is!!!)and for a while after that shes not happy at all and sulks etc not even accepting any of her favourite treats!! i could imagine that it could possibly give her more reason for hatred if we were to chop her wings off which she loves stretching out down her leg to show off.

I just personally dont think wing clipping would be the answer here.......

 

[SharonC]

Clipping is indeed a personal choice.

With Freddie, it has been helpful, in that he now has a better attitude, and much less biting. I do plan on letting the flights grow back, and they will. Birds still stretch their wings when they're clipped. You're not chopping off wings, just a few flight feathers which grow back quickly.

Again, it is a personal choice. There are pros and cons to making that decision, and you must do what you feel is best for you and the bird.

Good luck!

 

[michelle_brown_uk]

Thanks!

lmao - i didnt realise i said 'chop off her wings' - lol! i didnt mean that cause i know its a few flight feathers - whopps!!!