Bonding with opposite sex

[chris-md]

Hello all, I wanted to get your input as I continue to do my research into potential parrots on the effect of gender on potential bonding with multiple people.

For example, I have been looking into potentially buying a male eclectus baby because of their reputed docile nature. However Because I am gay, I have a male partner. Given the polyandrous nature of eclectus, would it maybe be smarter to get a female so it's increase the odds that my partner would be able to handle the bird (preventing one person bird)?

And I'd like to back that out to other species is well who are not polyandrous (pair Bond patrots). I have been considering a mini macaw and a blue crown conure well. I'm wondering if it wouldn't be better to try to maybe get a male of either species so is to try to prevent what the bird might see as sexual competition (I.e. Buying a female hahns, having it latch onto me, then having the bird see my partner as competition, thus he never gets to handle her ).

Is there any validity to this argument, injecting gender to try to work with the nature of the bird to get it to accept multiple people. Or is socialization really the key despite gender?

Forgive me if this is rambling and a tad unclear. I had surgery yesterday and I've had a couple Percocet

 

[Birdman666]

I don't buy into that gender thing.

While some birds may have gender preferences, what I've found to often be the case is the bird was only handled by a certain gender, or was handled more by that gender, and was therefore less trusting of another gender...

With macaws, you can get male bird dominance issues, but properly socialized, it isn't the norm...

Most dominance issues are learned (i.e. ones the owner inadvertently TAUGHT the bird. Bite me and I will give you what ever you want. Chase me and I'll go away. INSIST and, well, I guess YOU are the one in charge around here.)

It's a socialization issue in my opinion.

 

[thekarens]

I have 3 parrots, 2 females and 1 male. Both my wife and I can handle all 3. Gender has nothing to do with it IMO.

 

[Dinosrawr]

100% agree with everything said. Gender has nothing to do with it. Interactions are what count. The only time it does matter, like Birdman said, is when a bird has been abused/mistreated/only ever handled by a perceived gender long enough to sway a bird.

If your bird is properly socialized, it will love you both and let you both handle it.

Hope you feel better!

 

[labell]

I agree with all above and will add I have a female eclectus that is very bonded to me and is scared of my husband and other men. No reason for it she was actually hand fed by a man but that is her personality. I got her a little older so I really don't know if there was a cause for it before she came to live here.

My YNA is also a female and while she will happily go to my husband and pretty much anyone else I am her preferred person.

Eclectus are not pair bond birds females will have multiple males that feed them and that they copulate with and males will feed more than one female, they are the swingers of the bird world!

Any species you choose it would be advisable that you have female friends come over and interact with them as well as you and your partner so you don't inadvertently make them prefer one sex person over another and they end up well socialized with both sexes.

Good luck in your search for the perfect feathered addition.

 

[Birdman666]

Hello all, I wanted to get your input as I continue to do my research into potential parrots on the effect of gender on potential bonding with multiple people. For example, I have been looking into potentially buying a male eclectus baby because of their reputed docile nature. However Because I am gay, I have a male partner. Given the polyandrous nature of eclectus, would it maybe be smarter to get a female so it's increase the odds that my partner would be able to handle the bird (preventing one person bird)?

DOESN'T WORK THAT WAY.

FEMALES TEND TO BE "THE BOSS" IN AN ECKIE RELATIONSHIP. THAT'S WHY THE MALES ARE GENERALLY MORE DOCILE THAN THE FEMALES...

AND IT GENERALLY HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH THE GENDER OF THE PERSON HANDLING THEM. IT HAS MORE TO DO WITH HAVING MORE THAN ONE PERSON HANDLING THEM...

And I'd like to back that out to other species is well who are not polyandrous (pair Bond patrots). I have been considering a mini macaw and a blue crown conure well. I'm wondering if it wouldn't be better to try to maybe get a male of either species so is to try to prevent what the bird might see as sexual competition (I.e. Buying a female hahns, having it latch onto me, then having the bird see my partner as competition, thus he never gets to handle her ).

YOU DON'T WANT TO HAVE A BIRD MATE SITUATION WITH YOUR BIRD TO BEGIN WITH. YOU WANT TO BE MORE PARENT/TEACHER THAN "BIRD MATE."

BEING THE FAVORITE PERSON IS ONE THING, BEING VIEWED AS A POTENTIAL MATE, NOT SO GOOD...

ANY BIRD - MALE OR FEMALE - THAT VIEWS YOU AS IT'S MATE MAY TRY TO DRIVE A COMPETITOR OUT OF THE NEST, OR MAY ACTUALLY BITE YOU IN A FIT OF JEALOUSY...

THAT'S WHY WE TRY TO PREVENT "BIRD MATE" RELATIONSHIP ISSUES... BY PROPER SOCIALIZATION.

WITH PAIR BOND BIRDS - AND THAT'S ALL OF THEM - YOU HAVE A PROPENSITY TO OVERBOND. IF NOT HANDLED BY SOMEONE OTHER THAN THEIR PERSON, THEN THEY TEND TO NOT GO TO/WITH ANYONE ELSE.

Is there any validity to this argument, injecting gender to try to work with the nature of the bird to get it to accept multiple people. Or is socialization really the key despite gender?

IN MY OPIONION, NO.

 

[Zeithria]

I must agree with what everyone has been stating. I have owned and interacted with multiple eclectus from both sexes as well as other species and never once have I seen a correlation between which sex they prefer to bond with. I have had some males, prefer males, females prefer females, and visa versa. All the comments made here are correct and take heed int heir advise