back from vacation behavior

ifnlovebirds

Active member
Parrot of the Month 🏆
May 23, 2022
58
111
Parrots
Eclectus, conure, and cockatiel
So i went on a trip for about a month and a half and my mom had been taking care of him. (Male eclectus 1yr) As soon as i got back i got him out of his cage and he was letting me hold him and kiss him and cuddle him. Not even two minutes after he flew away from me back to his cage. (my fault for trying to get him back out) but because i missed him i tried to ask him to step up from inside his cage and he ended up biting me (not super hard but enough to draw a tiny drop of blood) I’ve read that parrots can get mad at you for leaving them but it’s been two days and he is still upset at me. It could be he forgot what stepping up is (but it’s only a month and half how could he forget something he did everyday) cuz he won’t step up for me anymore at all unless it’s for food.

he also flew to my hand just to bite me and then flew away. Our relationship before i left wasn’t the most perfect but it was enough to the point i could play with him grab him and hold him comfortably without fear of any bites. and even if i had to touched him in places he didn’t like (for nail trims) he would never bite me. but now just putting my hand near him he ruffles up and gets angry. especially when i close his cage door he LUNGES for my hand. maybe he is becoming territorial of his cage?

i’ve already gotten bit like three times (only once was blood drawn) and made the mistake of withdrawing my hand because i was so surprised.

is it really that he’s holding a grudge because i left him? or did he forget me?

any ideas? (also he used to never rly scream maybe i’ve heard it once or twice the year i’ve had him but now he’s full on SCREAMING AAHHHH AHHHH the ekkie ear piercing scream)

thank you for reading
 
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Yes most definitely, parrots can and will hold a grudge, especially if their person goes away for a period of time and no explanation was given. Always, always tell your parrot if you are going to be away, even if its just 1 day. I use fingers to show Salty how many days, but anything that can be counted will work ( one member used pool balls in rack to demonstrate it). You think they don't understand? Unless your parrot is totally new and unfamiliar with the household, they certainly know when you are not there. My Salty will hold a grudge against me if I go away for a weekend gig and neglect to explain to him how long I will not be home. Holding a grudge for him means a bite, and not a little one, every time I try to get near him and it can last a few days to a week. BUT if I explain it to him before hand, that shrinks down to 1/2 day or even less.

I suggest you sincerely apologize to him several times, offer a lot of make-up treats, but avoid things that are triggering him to bite.
 
Very common behavior. As a teacher, I'm home during the summer. My birds get used to me being there all day. As soon as school starts back I'm gone most of the day. For the first week, they don't notice, but after that they get distant. I cannot come home and just pick them up and play with them. I have to talk to them, pay them verbal attention for maybe 10 minutes. Offer them snacks. And then, maybe, I can pick them up. And that's with being gone for 10 hours. Gone for over a month... that's like starting from scratch. You need to do soft but excited voice, use a lot of smiles and facial expressions to show interest. Eat with the bird to show community. And even if it takes days, wait until they come to you before trying to pick them up. I don't think it's anger as much as distrust. Like how do they know you won't disappear again? And if a bird goes inside a cage, you never try to physically get them out. That is their home, their safe place. You wouldn't want someone reaching into your house to grab you.
 
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Yes most definitely, parrots can and will hold a grudge, especially if their person goes away for a period of time and no explanation was given. Always, always tell your parrot if you are going to be away, even if its just 1 day. I use fingers to show Salty how many days, but anything that can be counted will work ( one member used pool balls in rack to demonstrate it). You think they don't understand? Unless your parrot is totally new and unfamiliar with the household, they certainly know when you are not there. My Salty will hold a grudge against me if I go away for a weekend gig and neglect to explain to him how long I will not be home. Holding a grudge for him means a bite, and not a little one, every time I try to get near him and it can last a few days to a week. BUT if I explain it to him before hand, that shrinks down to 1/2 day or even less.

I suggest you sincerely apologize to him several times, offer a lot of make-up treats, but avoid things that are triggering him to bite.
Wow your bird understands that kind of explanation???? Fingers and pool balls wow they’re so smart ?!!! I really really underestimated their intelligence.

I will apologize to him a lot, i gave him a lot of hands free attention and treats and he seems to be forgiving me a little bit.

thank you for your response it eases me knowing it’s that more than like a unknown problem.
 
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Very common behavior. As a teacher, I'm home during the summer. My birds get used to me being there all day. As soon as school starts back I'm gone most of the day. For the first week, they don't notice, but after that they get distant. I cannot come home and just pick them up and play with them. I have to talk to them, pay them verbal attention for maybe 10 minutes. Offer them snacks. And then, maybe, I can pick them up. And that's with being gone for 10 hours. Gone for over a month... that's like starting from scratch. You need to do soft but excited voice, use a lot of smiles and facial expressions to show interest. Eat with the bird to show community. And even if it takes days, wait until they come to you before trying to pick them up. I don't think it's anger as much as distrust. Like how do they know you won't disappear again? And if a bird goes inside a cage, you never try to physically get them out. That is their home, their safe place. You wouldn't want someone reaching into your house to grab you.
You’re right me reaching in his cage was something i shouldn’t have done. i just got too excited to see him. I didn’t think ab how he might think that i might disappear again ahhh they’re too smart. i feel a lot better now knowing what to do

Thank you for ur response 🤍
 

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