Ashamed to admit - I'm afraid of being bitten

[NewQuakerMom]

Our birdie is the sweetest ever. He's not cage aggressive, or anything aggressive. He'll pinch you if you offer him a food he doesn't like, but otherwise he's never bitten. He'll fly to the back of my chair (which I'm fine with) and hop down onto my shoulder, (ok, that's fine) but now he's started hopping down onto my chest, right in front of my face, and I'm always afraid I'm going to annoy him without noticing, and he's going to bite me on my face! Everyone talks here about watching body language and so on, but I don't have good up-close eyesight, so he's a bit of a blur on my chest. What I do is turn my face away, talk sweet to him, close my eyes, pray, and call my kid to come and take him off my chest. He steps up beautifully but I'm just *sigh* nervous. I'm a dog person, generally, and I'm used to being able to love all over my animals, but I know you can't do that with a bird, and I don't want to offend him.
We've had him for a year now, he's a rescue, and he's sort of gradually warmed up more and more over that time. He's now SUPER friendly and sweet and I adore him - when I come into the room and he runs toward me on the top of his cage, I just love it, lol. I will stand and sweet-talk to him for an hour, but I just get so nervous when he's actually ON me.
Am I the only person with this issue? :17:
My kid has no problems of this sort. He walks all over her like she's his personal play-place, grooming her hair and whistling to her and she loves it.

 

[chris-md]

It’s perfectly normal to feel nervous about facial injuries. I don’t really fear being bit on my hand (I actively avoid it, but that’s just smart handling). But I HAVE been bitten on my face and ears a couple times with Parker on my shoulder. So now he doesn’t get shoulder privileges and I get very nervous when he’s up there.

Youuuu are noooot alooooooooone.

 

[saxguy64]

Nothing to be ashamed of. We all have our own comfort level with our birds. Hopefully though, you might transform the fear into healthy respect for the beak. We know what they're capable of! Much depends on how well you know your bird, and what level of trust you've developed with them.

In my case, I trust my ekkie 100%, so I allow him right in my face (his favorite place to be) without reservation. He loves to grab my nose, but I absolutely trust that he would never hurt me. My amazon, I'm a little more guarded with. She has a little potential to do some damage, so I don't put myself in a position where something could go wrong. Again though, I know her very well, so it's pretty easy to read her. Trick being, I have to watch. If I'm not paying attention, that's when mistakes happen, but at that point, it would be entirely my fault.

 

[Laurasea]

None if mine have ever bitten my face.
They have ever so gently groomed my eye lashes or eye brows...tho I don't encourage that

 

[Ira7]

If he’s on your chest, what can he bite? Yeah, I know...but no.

If you feel that worried about it, wear a denim jacket so he can’t grab a boob. If you’re worried about a finger, you have to get past this immediately. You can NOT be worried about being bitten when asking him to step up. You say stomach, right?

Well, my guy loves my shoulder, but he doesn’t want to get off via my hand. He’ll bite mildly, VERY mildly...like nothing...so I just walk over to his playstand and he happily steps off, on cue.

Now, I could do some aggressive training to get him to step up from my shoulder to my ha d (he’ll step up to my wife no problem from my shoulder), but why bother? You gotta pick your battles.

But never fear a bite. It’s what they sometimes do.

 

[noodles123]

When I first got bitten by Noodles (HARD), I developed some nervousness around it (despite having been bitten by macaws etc --one military in particular lol!) but if you are feeling those nerves, it may be because you don't know your bird well enough to be trying to pick him/her up. If you get bitten more than 25% of the time you try anything, that is far too frequent and due to issues with trust, or learned biting. Even 25% is very high (signalling a miscommunication of some sort). I have been bitten by Noodles 1x this year. It used to be more though, don't get me wrong.



When your trust is super solid, you just kind of know whether or not you will get bitten (excluding a once-in-a-blue-moon event). I think you need time and trust building, and an extensive knowledge of hormones (because that is where biting can appear random).


I have learned to manipulate and read Noodles so well, that I no longer have that fear. I think the best way to get over it is to build on behavior (ABA), hormones, and reading signals to avoid it altogether. They can sense tension and part of getting over that is really building that trust with your bird, but also a lot of observation/study, mitigating hormones, avoiding triggers etc.


It can be really tempting to move super slowly and inch closer, to test boundaries, but if you are sensing that you may get bitten and you know your bird, trust that and dont stress the both of you out by pushing it (unless it is essential for healthcare ).




When you are confident in your approach, you aren't on-edge, so you don't anticipate it because you are already monitoring hormones, getting 10 hours sleep, reading body language, building trust etc. When you are genuinely confident, that is usually because you have gotten to a place where that confidence applies. If you do get bitten anyway, then at least you already experienced it and know not to freak out or reward it with attention etc.



Consider what he wants and what you do after every bite. Most behaviors seek attention, escape, sensory or tangible rewards...but without hormone control, a good diet, sleep etc, you cant easily isolate behavior from complex physiology. that is why you need to meet all of the physical, mental needs before assuming that it is behavioral 100%


For me, the key was to do every single thing to prevent it, and then not react if I didn't know why it did. Babies may need to learn pressure or do more accidental biting than she did as an adult though. I knew hers were not due to ignorance.

 

[NewQuakerMom]

It’s perfectly normal to feel nervous about facial injuries. I don’t really fear being bit on my hand (I actively avoid it, but that’s just smart handling). But I HAVE been bitten on my face and ears a couple times with Parker on my shoulder. So now he doesn’t get shoulder privileges and I get very nervous when he’s up there.

Youuuu are noooot alooooooooone.

Thank you so much! I do kind of fear being bitten on my hands as well. My kid will put him on my hand, but I don't seek it out. I like to pet him, it's so cute when I sweet talk him and his face goes POOF all fluffy, and he turns his face asking to have his head feathers scritchled, it's adorable. But I don't ask him to step up. I did have a bird (someone else's, poorly trained and a little insane from bad treatment) bite me really hard once so that's probably why - I guess I need to train MYSELF lol!!

 

[NewQuakerMom]

Nothing to be ashamed of. We all have our own comfort level with our birds. Hopefully though, you might transform the fear into healthy respect for the beak. We know what they're capable of! Much depends on how well you know your bird, and what level of trust you've developed with them.

In my case, I trust my ekkie 100%, so I allow him right in my face (his favorite place to be) without reservation. He loves to grab my nose, but I absolutely trust that he would never hurt me. My amazon, I'm a little more guarded with. She has a little potential to do some damage, so I don't put myself in a position where something could go wrong. Again though, I know her very well, so it's pretty easy to read her. Trick being, I have to watch. If I'm not paying attention, that's when mistakes happen, but at that point, it would be entirely my fault.

Maybe I just don't know him well enough. He's more my kid's, she's the one who works with him, teaching him tricks, and so on and so forth, so I mainly just talk sweet to him, give him treats, and pet his head, lol!
Your ekkie sounds like a doll!

 

[NewQuakerMom]

None if mine have ever bitten my face.
They have ever so gently groomed my eye lashes or eye brows...tho I don't encourage that

That's really sweet.

 

[NewQuakerMom]

If he’s on your chest, what can he bite? Yeah, I know...but no.

If you feel that worried about it, wear a denim jacket so he can’t grab a boob. If you’re worried about a finger, you have to get past this immediately. You can NOT be worried about being bitten when asking him to step up. You say stomach, right?

Well, my guy loves my shoulder, but he doesn’t want to get off via my hand. He’ll bite mildly, VERY mildly...like nothing...so I just walk over to his playstand and he happily steps off, on cue.

Now, I could do some aggressive training to get him to step up from my shoulder to my ha d (he’ll step up to my wife no problem from my shoulder), but why bother? You gotta pick your battles.

But never fear a bite. It’s what they sometimes do.

Well, as long as I keep my face turned away, he wouldn't be able to bite my face, which is why I keep my face turned away, lol. But if I were to sit with my face turned naturally, he'd easily be able to bite my lip, etc. He's really tall - I think he's big for a quaker.
I *am* totally worried about being bitten if I ask him to step up - I never do it bc I don't want to annoy him, lol! He's the one who instigates our contact every time. Bearing in mind that he's primarily my kid's bird, and she handles him easily. It's just me that has the worry.
I haven't spent the time with him that she has - I don't want to mess with their bond. But as a result, I don't feel the same trust she does.

 

[saxguy64]

It’s perfectly normal to feel nervous about facial injuries. I don’t really fear being bit on my hand (I actively avoid it, but that’s just smart handling). But I HAVE been bitten on my face and ears a couple times with Parker on my shoulder. So now he doesn’t get shoulder privileges and I get very nervous when he’s up there.



Youuuu are noooot alooooooooone.

Thank you so much! I do kind of fear being bitten on my hands as well. My kid will put him on my hand, but I don't seek it out. I like to pet him, it's so cute when I sweet talk him and his face goes POOF all fluffy, and he turns his face asking to have his head feathers scritchled, it's adorable. But I don't ask him to step up. I did have a bird (someone else's, poorly trained and a little insane from bad treatment) bite me really hard once so that's probably why - I guess I need to train MYSELF lol!!

100% correct. With any animal, training the human is the bulk of the issue. It's much easier for them if the human can better communicate their expectations with consistency. Often easier said than done.

 

[NewQuakerMom]

If you get bitten more than 25% of the time you try anything, that is far too frequent and due to issues with trust, or learned biting. Even 25% is very high (signalling a miscommunication of some sort). I have been bitten by Noodles 1x this year. It used to be more though, don't get me wrong.
>>>>>>>
When your trust is super solid, you just kind of know whether or not you will get bitten (excluding a once-in-a-blue-moon event). I think you need time and trust building, and an extensive knowledge of hormones (because that is where biting can appear random).
>>>>>>>
It can be really tempting to move super slowly and inch closer, to test boundaries, but if you are sensing that you may get bitten and you know your bird, trust that and dont stress the both of you out by pushing it (unless it is essential for healthcare ).
>>>>>>>
Consider what he wants and what you do after every bite. Most behaviors seek attention, escape, sensory or tangible rewards...but without hormone control, a good diet, sleep etc, you cant easily isolate behavior from complex physiology. that is why you need to meet all of the physical, mental needs before assuming that it is behavioral 100%


For me, the key was to do every single thing to prevent it, and then not react if I didn't know why it did. Babies may need to learn pressure or do more accidental biting than she did as an adult though. I knew hers were not due to ignorance.

But he's literally never bitten either of us. He pinched me once when I tried to offer him cabbage for the third time without tasting myself first. (At the time I didn't know he won't try a new food unless we taste it first and tell him how delicious it is. I think he was an emperor in his last life, or he has enemies in the birdie mafia, since he apparently thinks new food = poison.) But it was just a little pinch, and I don't even count it as a bite. (Having been REALLY bitten by someone else's bird years ago.)
He will, however VICIOUSLY and terrifyingly bite the perch if he doesn't want to step up, or anything we put in his cage that he thinks is a threat, etc. which is a little when he's usually so sweet. But he's never bitten my kid when she asked him to step up, he just avoids her hand or looks at her with a "Are you kidding me?" expression. He will sometimes accidentally get skin when he's playing with her shirt (playing = attempting to destroy via beak) so she tends to wear layers when he's going to be running around on her. He really is just the sweetest bird ever, so tolerant of a couple of novices, lol!
And yet, I'm still worried he's going to randomly bite at some point!

 

[NewQuakerMom]

PS - thank you everyone, for your comments. I haven't had my coffee yet, and I didn't say thanks for responding a single time, but I genuinely appreciate all of your thoughts!!!!

 

[saxguy64]

No worries! We're here to share experiences, and help in any way we can. This is truly an exceptional community for those who love their birds. We're glad you're here!

 

[SailBoat]

Please wear you glasses! Not being able to see 'anything' close-up can be the foundation of any number of painful events. Especially when it involves a creature with teeth or a bill.

Very few, if any Humans do not have a nature fear of being bitten. I believe that we are hardwired with that response. An unnatural response is to become obessed with the fear. As an adult, one needs to be concerned that we are not teaching our children to mimic that response.

Fear is an emotion that stems from the basic fight or flight response and our failure to choose one or the other. When the choice is make, the fear diminishes.

 

[noodles123]

This is not the best advice, but if you are a social drinker, you might consider a glass of wine (or 2 ;0 ) before evening training sessions lol! I think the more positive exposure you have, the less frightening it will be.

 

[Ira7]

If he’s on your chest, what can he bite? Yeah, I know...but no.

If you feel that worried about it, wear a denim jacket so he can’t grab a boob. If you’re worried about a finger, you have to get past this immediately. You can NOT be worried about being bitten when asking him to step up. You say stomach, right?

Well, my guy loves my shoulder, but he doesn’t want to get off via my hand. He’ll bite mildly, VERY mildly...like nothing...so I just walk over to his playstand and he happily steps off, on cue.

Now, I could do some aggressive training to get him to step up from my shoulder to my ha d (he’ll step up to my wife no problem from my shoulder), but why bother? You gotta pick your battles.

But never fear a bite. It’s what they sometimes do.

Well, as long as I keep my face turned away, he wouldn't be able to bite my face, which is why I keep my face turned away, lol. But if I were to sit with my face turned naturally, he'd easily be able to bite my lip, etc. He's really tall - I think he's big for a quaker.
I *am* totally worried about being bitten if I ask him to step up - I never do it bc I don't want to annoy him, lol! He's the one who instigates our contact every time. Bearing in mind that he's primarily my kid's bird, and she handles him easily. It's just me that has the worry.
I haven't spent the time with him that she has - I don't want to mess with their bond. But as a result, I don't feel the same trust she does.

It’s totally logical to be cautious...and afraid...of getting bit in the face. This indicates you have a brain.

My 2-year-old Amazon has never bitten me with aggression, but because of that, I am totally vulnerable to getting bit in the face when he’s on my shoulder. I’m totally irresponsible about it because I’ve had no reason to worry about it ever happening.

But I know with hormones surging, it will.

Maybe it’s different with a Quaker who is more active. My guy is usually a mellow fellow and I can clearly read his moods, so I would just avoid shouldering when I see him getting a little nutso. Like, we play catch/fetch with a small rubber ball, which puts him in hyper-mode, so I would never shoulder him after one of these games. Nor even give him my hand to step up!

I understand your fear, but a bite to the hand from a Quaker usually won’t send you to the hospital (I think). I’m always amazed by the bravery of folks who own MACAWS!

That beak, and what it can do, scares the hell out of me.

 

[NewQuakerMom]

Please wear you glasses! Not being able to see 'anything' close-up can be the foundation of any number of painful events. Especially when it involves a creature with teeth or a bill.

Very few, if any Humans do not have a nature fear of being bitten. I believe that we are hardwired with that response. An unnatural response is to become obessed with the fear. As an adult, one needs to be concerned that we are not teaching our children to mimic that response.

Fear is an emotion that stems from the basic fight or flight response and our failure to choose one or the other. When the choice is make, the fear diminishes.

I generally only wear my glasses when reading or when beading or doing some other type of up-close work. When I'm sitting and watching TV or whatever, I'm glasses-free. And it's only once in a while that he decides to pay me a visit, lol - it's not predictable.
I don't scream or flail around, I just very calmly turn my face away and call for my kiddo to come and ask him to step up. She's not afraid at all.

 

[NewQuakerMom]

......

But I know with hormones surging, it will.

Maybe it’s different with a Quaker who is more active. My guy is usually a mellow fellow and I can clearly read his moods, so I would just avoid shouldering when I see him getting a little nutso. Like, we play catch/fetch with a small rubber ball, which puts him in hyper-mode, so I would never shoulder him after one of these games. Nor even give him my hand to step up!

I understand your fear, but a bite to the hand from a Quaker usually won’t send you to the hospital (I think). I’m always amazed by the bravery of folks who own MACAWS!

That beak, and what it can do, scares the hell out of me.

How do you know hormones are surging? Our guy isn't very active, he mostly hangs out on his perch or on top of his cage, but once in a while he just decides to come and visit me. He doesn't like to play games, just likes to sit and be petted and sweet talked to.

 

[NewQuakerMom]

This is not the best advice, but if you are a social drinker, you might consider a glass of wine (or 2 ;0 ) before evening training sessions lol! I think the more positive exposure you have, the less frightening it will be.

LOL! I don't drink, no.. And I also don't do his training sessions - my kiddo does his training, I'm more the grandma who sweet talks him and gives him treats and he likes to come and visit once in a while.