Are they Buddies or not

[cburnett565]

Hi
I have a question and not sure if this is the case or not. I have a Red Lored Amazon and a Blue Front. I have had the RL for 7 years and according to the pet shop (I know I did this before I knew better) said he/she was young...NOT...Not a good pet shop, all they have are parrots and I have reported them several times and so have other people according to the person I talked to on the phone. Anyway, Chico (RL) was out of control!!! Took me a good 6 months before I could even handle him and he would trust me to be his friend.

I am getting off subject but anyway, Chico 7 yrs old (RL) and Jasper 13 yrs old(BF); Now Jasper was adopted from his owner because they had got some kittens and the cats as they grew never took their eyes off Jasper so for his safety; they re-homed him.
They have been together sharing space since I got Jasper. Jasper has been with my family for 5 years.

Well, I put them on this website to find them a new home because I work two jobs and do not have quality time to spend with them. They are out of their cages a lot!!!! Usually when I spy on them it is so cute, they are preening each other. Jasper will reguratate (SP) his food and feed Chico. My concern is separating them.

I really do love them and don't want to find them another home; but I also want them to get the attention they need and deserve! But they do have each other, they get their showers and attention but I feel that they should have a lot more. They are out on our screened in porch the whole summer and they have their own room in the house when it starts to get cooler. I’m aft=raid if I don’t handle them much they will eventually not want anything to do with me.

My question is should I rehome them, is it that tragic for them to be placed in another home, I really planned on keeping them forever, but working two jobs, I don't have time.....it sucks and I hate it, but it's making me feel guilty.

Help please and please don't be harsh.....I have seen some people comment to others rudely and I already feel guilty, but this economy is forcing me to work long hours.

 

[Nakiska]

Awww...I have totally been in your shoes. I am a mother of 2 sons and a daughter and I am a pet fanatic! From horses, cats, dogs, gold fish, goats and yes...birds!

I went through a phase, a single Mom, 3 kids, 2 jobs, and a bunch of pets.

Like you, I felt guilty didn't have the amount of quality time to spend with all I had, but perservered and kept everything I could. My kids loved our pets as much as I did and somehow we made it work...sure, the horses didn't get ridden as much as we'd have liked, the dogs had to be left alone often, but were always happy to see us pull in the driveway, our bird was left to entertain himself in his cage, and when we walked in the door, he screeched with delight that we were home, our goats happily munched the brush back and blatted their hello's through their mouth fulls of leaves, our horses would run, nickering "feed me, feed me" to the fence line. (because they truly enjoyed being semi-retired )

I CHOSE to keep my pets through the tough times, because even though I didn't have all the time I wanted for them, I still MADE bits of time for each of them and I knew that although things were very tough now...it wasn't going to be this way forever and eventually I'd have more quality time to dedicate to our pets. When the chips were down for me, our pets brightened our day. They were a pleasant distraction to all the stress because no matter how bad things were, our pets were always happy to see me/us and be around us. All their needs were met every day, fed, watered, pens/cages cleaned. It definitely made for more work, but it was GOOD work, soul soothing, stress relieving work.

In my personal opinion, I would not re-home your birds, (at least not yet) from what you describe, they sound happy and content, they have each other when you are gone and they have YOU when you are around. and if you can develop some kind of a routine thats fairly consistent with your schedule to make a block of time most every day or night (that you can) to have your birds out with you, either one at a time or together, they'll learn to expect it and look forward to it and most days/nights you'll be grateful for it.

Good luck with what ever you choose to do.

Toni

 

[mtdoramike]

A little quality time is better than no time for them or re-homing them. I'm sure they would feel this way.

 

[Nakiska]

I also forgot to mention above...when I said I went through a phase...most people think of a phase being a few months, a short term thing...but for me I went from being a home daycare provider to working 2 jobs OUTSIDE the home. (60 hours a week) Talk about a culture shock! And it wasn't just a few months, it was YEARS!! My kids were 6, 7 and 12 when I had to close my daycare and go back to work. My kids had to go to the boys and girls club before and after school and I had to leave them all home at night when I worked the graveyard shift.

As far as our pet's were concerned...most pets are very resiliant...I mean think about it, mine were flogged with attention, all day every day...I was a stay a home Mom, with not only my kids, but a house full of daycare kids. And then I had to go back into the work force, outside the home, and everyone thought I should have gotten rid of my horses and in general just cut back on my pets because in THEIR eyes...I just couldn't possibly have time for them.

I argued back that my pets are happy, healthy, content, well cared for and just because you all don't think I have time for them, you think I should get rid of them...just come to my house, see for yourself my "neglected" pets and make your decision.

We chose NOT to have TV, we chose NOT to have video games, and for a long time, we didn't even have internet...let my tell you...those 3 "luxuries" are TIME KILLERS! LOLOLOLOL!!!!, we chose to stay home and enjoy all we were working hard to keep instead of go to the movies or indulge in some other luxury I couldn't afford anyway, because..yes, I'm greedy and I chose pets first, over modern luxuries.

And our pets adjusted...my schedule was a mess back then, I was going 7 days week and didn't know if I lost my horse or found my rope 1/2 the time. It was a bit of a sacrifice for me too..working in the time to take care of them all, and sometimes I was out late at night, or up hours early. But as I've said, I love my pets and it was worth it to ME.

To this day, I still have my 3 horses, and for example, my one mare is 23 and I've owned her 16 years. I've had many spurts, some of them several years long, of bad luck, many people telling me I should just sell 'em and move on...but in my heart my horses are priceless and when I had no where to turn, I had my horse to cry on...I STILL have my horse to cry on and there is something to be said for that.

Our pets were an especially welcome distraction to all the stress I was under and somehow I think pet's understand "tough times."

Also, I might feel a little differently if you'd just gotten the birds and the unexpected happened and you were in the process of trying to bond with them...that can be rough, not impossible, but rough...but you already have a working relationship with them both, and techincally speaking, they are part of your family, so I think they understand you and all you are going through.

Keep your chin up...I know it's hard, please believe me, I know..but trust me for now and enjoy the time you DO get with your birds and don't worry so much that they aren't happy. I think they sound quite content and will be a welcome distraction to the stress of working 2 jobs.

Again, good luck with what ever you choose to do.

Take care,

Toni

 

[suebee]

you need to do what you need to do,

but it sounds like the couple enjoy each others company, an have a good home, your situation could change where you might not need to work as much in the future, and as they are already use to you being about, there carer, i think as long as you keep up with a minium of contact to keep them social towards you, when you have the time, regaining that trust would not take long

 

[merlinsmom13]

Your birds sound like they are happy, adjusted. Is there anything going on to make you think they are not? We all have alot of guilt about how we react w/our family & pets. Sometimes its warranted, sometimes we are doing it to ourselves. Good luck w/making the best choice for you & your family.

 

[cburnett565]

Thank you fo all yor replies.....I also have 3 cats, and I am a pet groomer during the day and work a grocery store a few evenings but by the time the dinner is done and work around the house and returning calls and paper is all done.

Im exhausted. They do get attention but they used to get so much more and it just makes me feel terrible for them. I know they can be friends preening each other then there's other times I have to break them up. They are both flighted so when my house is home Jasper has to stay in the cage. If my husband spends time on the sun porch where they are.

But, I guess its best to keep them, that's what really worried me the idea of giving them up is not somethiing i would want to do, but if it were better for them then I would do it. They are really cute together......But I am sure Chico would rather be alone, he runs to me to get away from Jasper or is he doing it just to hang out with me? It make me wonder, if he just tolates Jasper or is it he just really wnats to hang out with me...It's so cute,,

Thank you for all your comments....

 

[suebee]

awww chico knows the hand that feeds him needs charming to

i agree with merlin about the guilt trips we put ourselves on

and yes a full day every day is very tiring! so remember to treat yourself to some me time

 

[hahatc]

Great information! I’ve been looking for something like this for a while now. Thanks!