Are some birds "un-tameable"?

[hiriki]

I know this is an opinion question for the most part but wanted to hear some feedback from the community

I rescue only, so my lovebird was already an adult when she came to my flock. Hand taming her has been on-and-off... I can sometimes convince her to eat seedballs from my fingers but it's been about three years and that's as far as I've gotten. She won't step up, and aside from landing near me and talking to me, she really doesn't interact with me much.

I'm OK with that!

However, I think there is a decision to be made here, as she hasn't bonded with the rest of my flock (not surprisingly--they're doves, cockatiels and a conure, so she sticks out). If she's a bird's bird and I just need to accept that, it might be time to find her a lovebird companion.

Thoughts?

 

[zERo]

You could get her a companion, if she does well with your other birds. If you get another lovebird that is at least semi tame to humans she could be more likely to become tame if she sees the other bird stepping up etc. I do think some birds can't be tamed, I have a 12 yr old male cockatiel I rescued from an awful situation (tiny cage, ate only seed, only smooth perches, no toys) I've had him since April of 2021 and he's definitely much more used to me and will eat millet from my hand but I know he will never step up, he's been too traumatized (being screamed at, things thrown at his cage) I also have 1yr and 8mo old female cockatiel (was 6mo when I got her) she will eat millet from my hand but her previous owners tried to tame her by wearing thick gloves and holding her until she quit struggling which pretty much ruined any trust she could've had with humans. If your lovebird wasn't introduced to humans positively while young she might never become tame, no matter how long you work with her but you could keep trying if you feel like there's hope, and there certainly is with some birds, just not every bird. Hope this helps

 

[wrench13]

I have read over and over that IRN's either wild caught or domestically raised (once they have been left alone for awhile ie not handled at all) are extremely hard to tame or retame. They go back to an almost wild state readily. And lovies are very hand shy, my ex BIL had a pair that never tamed up.

 

[Emeral]

I know this is an opinion question for the most part but wanted to hear some feedback from the community

I rescue only, so my lovebird was already an adult when she came to my flock. Hand taming her has been on-and-off... I can sometimes convince her to eat seedballs from my fingers but it's been about three years and that's as far as I've gotten. She won't step up, and aside from landing near me and talking to me, she really doesn't interact with me much.

I'm OK with that!

However, I think there is a decision to be made here, as she hasn't bonded with the rest of my flock (not surprisingly--they're doves, cockatiels and a conure, so she sticks out). If she's a bird's bird and I just need to accept that, it might be time to find her a lovebird companion.

Thoughts?

You have taken a good care of a happy flock. Each came as a rescue only. So I admire and respect that. I also want to thank you on behalf of this little lovebird that you are looking for the best alternative for her. Thank you for being open minded and seeking feedback.

Before accepting that she wont step up,
Let's focus on what usually need to be done to make it happen.

1)in the morning, did she enjoy 1 to 2 hours of out of cage and socialization time?

2) in the evening, did she enjoy 1 to 2 hours of out of cage and socialization time?

3) if the answers to the above questions are yes, then what were the training routine used?

Since all members in your flock, step up. ...........How much time each day, did this little lovebird had with the trainer?
...........Did she receive the same amount of time? Or
...........comparatively, did she received less time?

I am just trying to point out that some individual need more time than another. Sadly, some kids at the back of the human class room might be left out or forgotten this way too. So what do we do with that kiddos at the back of a class? This is never easy. But occasionally, a new teacher may came along to give them undivided attention.

I think the reason that she doesn't interact with you much is because you don't have much time left. Your time was well spent with the recues and the flock already. So may I suggest another possible solution......

How about rehoming her? To someone who have time and eager to train her consistently? Give her a chance to bond with a person that has no other pet. Imagine...what would be the result of this? Oh and she will come with instructions too......

Thread 'Tips for Bonding and Building Trust' https://www.parrotforums.com/threads/tips-for-bonding-and-building-trust.49144/

Another thing is, bringing in a new lovebird could result in fighting between them too. If this occur, then you might end up having two lovebirds that don't step up instead of one.

 

[LaManuka]

I once had a beautiful cockatiel hen called Twinkle who I rescued off the street, oh about 16 years or so ago. After fruitless attempts to find her owner we decided to keep her. She was most definitely NOT hand tame and, despite the fine examples set by my other birdies to prove to her that we weren't going to eat her, steadfastly refused to have anything at all to do with the human members of the household for about eight years. I was fine with that because she was such a beautiful, sassy girl and I loved her to bits, even though she gave me no choice but to admire her from afar. I had no way of knowing whether Twinkle had been an aviary bird or someone's beloved, hand tamed pet.

One day, and I don't quite know how it happened, but suddenly it was like a light switch flicked on in her little head and she realised that she had no need to fear me any longer. Almost overnight she went from wanting nothing to do with me to being the tamest, most sweet-natured bird I ever could have hoped that she would be, the sort of little birdie who you could do just about anything with, and who would happily sit for hours on end just having her head scratched and just never, ever get enough! Still very sassy mind you and full of attitude, but just a complete 180 degree turn around from the fearful bird that she had been before. Very sadly we lost her only a few years later to heavy metal toxicity which both my husband and I were quite heartbroken over.

I'm so glad that you say you are fine with the way your little lovie is - I was much the same way with Twinkle too. The moral of my tale I guess is just keep trying, always be there for your lovie girl and try to make every interaction with her a positive one, although it sounds to me like you are doing tremendously well with her already. One fine day she might just surprise you the way Twinkle surprised me. Although I hope it doesn't take your little one eight years to come around the way Twink did!

 

[hiriki]

Thank you everyone for your feedback! @Emeral I haven't considered rehoming her, and I think that would be a very last resort for me to take, but your teacher metaphor did get me thinking that I need to take a more active role as trainer. I got the clicker out tonight, I'm not going to even *try* to train "step up" until I've trained her to do some much easier things (like "sing" and maybe to raise her wings) that don't require me to touch her. Maybe I'll get one of those tiny basketball courts and teach her a sport

Hopefully she'll have enough fun playing with the clicker and learning how to get rewards that we'll develop a bit more trust and she might be willing to step out of her comfort zone and onto my finger.

I don't think I'm going to get her a companion until I've put much more effort into earning her trust because I think I'd be hard pressed to find a hand tamed lovebird in a rescue and as several people have stated, I have no way of knowing the introduction would be successful until I try.

 

[Icca]

I see this post is from awhile ago but it got me thinking. I have shetland ponies who where unhandled and 1 was very nervous when I got them. Now they look to interact with me and are so gentle. Anyways my thinking is since both birds and horses are prey animals who prefer to flee from scary situations maybe some desensitizing techniques could transfer. It's basically presenting something that causes fear (such as a hand for step up) then removing the scary object when the animal shows interest. What I might do is sit next to your guy either caged or loose and raise you hand to his height but keep it a few feet away from the bird. At this point yur not ask him to step up. You just want him to be calm and comfortable with your hand present. When he seems calmer or better yet curious of your hand, move you hand away from him. Do this several times a day and soon you can move closer and closer to his feet. Then ideally you will be right in position for step up and he will be much calmer with the approach. This is a really simplified version but if you're interested look up Monty Roberts / approach and retreat technique
Just a thought not shure if that helps you at all

 

[Skarila]

I'd say yes, possible that there are some parrots who never seem to become tame, ever.

Csilli, a budgie girl who was saved from outside from jaws od death, always stayed very timid and terrifies of hands. We had her for 8 years nearly, and she is still a shy girl. First 3 years she was terrified of people, later she warmed up to us, she did have her days when she wanted somehow to interact with us (whistling, knocking, kissing the belly) but never ever did she accepted food from our hands, god forbid stepping up. Furthest she ever came by was sitting on my partner's shoulder. Even that is usually short lived. She is terrified of many many things, and somehow it seems she kind of turned back to her wild side since i got Pascal, a conure that was aviary bred, totally wild, but young, and who became my new bff in just 10 months (how time flies!!!)