Am i doing this right?

[Pixey]

Hi All

I sincerely would appreciate your advice.

I ended 2016 with two IRN's - Cheeky (blue) and Joy (white). On the 1st day of this year, we managed to lose our eldest, and Cheeky has not been recovered yet.

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Joy was extremely attached to Cheeky, she followed him around everywhere. Because of the depth of the loss that the humans felt, we were completely against acquiring a new bird; we did not want to give up hope.

Over the month of January, Joy started plucking feathers. At first we thought she was just molting - she is only 18 months now. But in the beginning of Feb we noticed that she is not just plucking down feathers anymore, but full feathers as well.

I tried to spend a lot of time with her to TRY and help her through the transition of not having a companion bird around. When i noticed a bleeding bald spot behind her neck a week ago, i had a tiny 9 on the Richter scale meltdown.

My partner (who was Cheeky's human) decided there and then to get another bird, on account of my freaking out. He is convinced that she is just stressed out and would eventually adjust, but that a new bird around would calm her down faster.

Because it is well past Sep/Oct, we knew we would only get a bird that's already a couple of months old. Monday we welcomed Hope to our family. I am fine with Hopey, he is adorable - still a bit wary of us, but getting there.

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The problem...

Joy and Cheeky shared a cage. Joy has always been reluctant to go to bed, Cheeky was very set in his routine: 8pm he started screeching all the while climbing in and out of his cage to let us know we must come close him up. Joy used to resist a bit, but it was never a struggle to get her in the cage.

The past month however, it's been a hell of a fight every single evening to put her away. She is now puffed up and aggressive by default around 8pm, without us even saying a word about bed, or making a move to put her away.

My heart is very sore every night when it's bedtime. Hopey has already adjusted to the cage, it is his safe haven. Joy detests the cage and never wants to be inside it - day or night time.

How must i handle this?

 

[GaleriaGila]

I am so very sorry for your troubles, and your birds'.
I didn't catch whether they are flighted or not...
My bird is habitually fearless and flighted and will only go into his cage when I toss his favorite treat, a big green chile, into it, which lures him right in. Is there ANY treat or object that could be tempting enough?

 

[Pixey]

Thank you for responding!

We keep their wings clipped. Her favorite treat used to be raw cashews but lately i noticed that they remain untouched. She is extremely intelligent - i know all moms say this, but truly, there is no tricking this bird.

If i can catch her off guard and move swiftly, then i can place her in the cage and close it before she even knows what happened. But then she gives a few high pitched shrieks after being covered which really upsets me.

She is no longer plucking at her feathers so aggressively, and for this i am grateful but she is showing ZERO interest in Hope, still keeps calling Cheeky, have a new obsession with biting our toes and nails - and gets VERY aggressive whenever i tell her "No". It's actually very cute when she gets all uppity, but i am really not happy about her constant state of distress.

My partner is not impressed with my wanting to take her to the vet (way too pricey for our budget), but i have been saving up as i cannot bear the thought of anything happening to her.

I considered getting a new cage just for her, but my partner feels that yet another change / adjustment for her is not a good idea right now.

I also stopped handling her so much, as i fear that i may unintentionally have been causing her to stress?

My subconscious is dominated by this little creature, i have constant nightmares about her dying, and my health is suffering (all stress related stuff like eczema and ibs). Can she pick up on my anxiousness?

I fear that i am not the best person to own a bird, keep making mistake on mistake. But i love this animal dearly, it is SO precious to me, and i really want to figure out how to do this right.

Apologies for the long read, suppose i am venting a bit as well.

 

[SilverSage]

I'm so sorry for your loss.

Has he stopped plucking? Usually the first thing you would want to do when a bird starts plucking is take them straight to the vet for at least gram stains and a parasite screening, and if those show nothing, then blood work.

As far as getting the bird back in the cage; is your new bird sharing a cage with the original? If so that might be causing a big part of the problem.

Also it would be wise to find his favorite treat and use that to reward him GENEROUSLY for going in his cage, but not use it for anything else. It might also be wise to start feeding meals instead of free feeding. If he is excited to go into his cage for his food (and most IRNs are pigs) it should help.


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[Pixey]

I'm so sorry for your loss.

Has he stopped plucking? Usually the first thing you would want to do when a bird starts plucking is take them straight to the vet for at least gram stains and a parasite screening, and if those show nothing, then blood work.

As far as getting the bird back in the cage; is your new bird sharing a cage with the original? If so that might be causing a big part of the problem.

Also it would be wise to find his favorite treat and use that to reward him GENEROUSLY for going in his cage, but not use it for anything else. It might also be wise to start feeding meals instead of free feeding. If he is excited to go into his cage for his food (and most IRNs are pigs) it should help.


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No, she still plucks, but not so aggressively - i have not seen any feathers lying around lately. A week ago, i could almost build a new bird with all the feathers i swept up in the mornings.

Yes, sharing a cage - we figured since she was used to sharing a cage already, it would be a consolation to have the new bird with her.

She has reverted back to hand feeding - the only way i can get food into Hope is by feeding him (we bent a teaspoon's top for this purpose), and Joy gets overly excited when she sees the bird food being readied for Hope. Tried luring her into the cage with this as well, but she just gives me a dirty look and a sneeze, then walks away. Impossible!

 

[EllenD]

First of all I am so so sorry for your loss, and I truly hope Cheeky returns. Never give up hope, birds have been found months, even years after being lost.

Now, the very first thing you need to do is separate the new bird from Joy! You immediately need to get the new bird its own cage, as Joy may really hurt the baby badly, or much much worse! Please, please get them out of the same cage! Not only because the new baby may be injured or worse, but because this new bird in Joy's cage (and this is Joy's cage, remember that) is no doubt causing Joy a ton more stress than she would be having otherwise. You need to get the new bird into its own cage and then gradually introduce them to each other. You should have placed the new bird in a new cage and started out slowly (the new bird should always be quarantined for a month in a separate room in case of illness), by placing their cages in the same room so that they can see each other. Out of cage time together should be supervised ONLY. After a couple of weeks of that, if they start talking to each other and joy is showing interest in the new bird, then you can put their cages next to each other. But quite honestly I would never suggest having them in the same cage, they will each need their own cage to have their own toys, own food, and own place to sleep. Again, introduce them slowly and never let them out together unsupervised!

I know that you were just trying to make Joy feel better, and I know you thought that you should put the birds together because Joy lived with Cheeky. But the new bird, Hope, is not Cheeky, and Joy not only knows this but is no doubt really upset that this new bird is in her cage where Cheeky should be. Right now you say she is totally ignoring the new bird, but I can't stress this to you enough and I don't want you to have a horrible regret...Joy is very likely to try to hurt the new baby at any time. Joy is very stressed because she lost her bonded mate. When this happens it hurts them just like it would hurt a person losing their mate. But she will eventually get better with it, I promise she will. But it may take several months or longer for her to be back to her old self. In the meantime you've inadvertently increased her stress tenfold by putting a new baby bird inside her home that was shared with the mate she just lost, and birds can become very territorial over cages, people, other birds, toys, etc
I have seen birds come in to the rescue I volunteer at that were added to a flock after a bird died, and this new bird is missing toes, feet, their entire beak, or much worse. So please do not let them in that cage together. This should help pretty directly with getting Joy to go back in the cage. And place the new cage in the same room within sight of Joy. Let them get to know each other slowly, then IF they like each other, talk to each other, then move the cages next to each other. But I'm afraid that ever putting them in the same cage full time is a very bad idea. Again, Hope is a beautiful little baby IRN. But she is not Cheeky, and Joy will not ever think of her as such. It's good she will have a friend eventually, but let it be in her own time.

Also, please don't shy away from petting, touching, holding, snuggling, loving, or spending as much time as you did with Joy! Please, she doesn't need any other changes like that, she needs just the opposite, she needs you to spend a lot more time with her, a lot more snuggles, pets, scratches, playing, as much as you can. Feed her from your hand, give her her own plate at your dinner table while you eat. You need to think of her as a human that just lost their mate, because that's basically what she is.

And yes, she absolutely should go to a certified avian vet ASAP, the stress from losing Cheeky plus the new bird in her cage can cause behavioral, emotional, and physiological issues. Plucking is a severe sign of stress, and she should be completely checked over, blood work, etc.

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[SilverSage]

Well I was basically going to say all the things Ellen said, and with an extra emphasis on the health side of things. Plucking nearly ALWAYS has a health component, especially when it first starts. The stress of losing cheeky likely weakened Joy's immune system to allow her to get sick, likely leading to the plucking. Plucking almost never is caused by just one thing at a time, so please please PLEASE get Joy to a vet, and like Ellen said, those birds need to be separated ASAP. Not to be unnecessarily graphic, but I have seen birds kill each other over this kind of thing.


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[Pixey]

Good morning EllenD and SilverSage, thank you both for your guidance. I did not realize having two separate cages is of this much importance (was so used to two birds, one cage). Will remedy this immediately.

It's a fairly standard size cage, and Joy has never enjoyed spending time in it - but we always thought it is just because she was our "outdoorsy" baby while Cheeky was more introverted. They spent nights together in the cage just fine.

As for getting Joy to an avian vet, i will have a fight on my hands about this. Since she has stopped mutilating herself now, my partner would not deem it necessary. And because the behaviour stopped when Hope arrived, he will also oppose separating them.

But like i said, she is still too busy with her feathers for my liking and my gut kept telling me though that i need to have her checked out anyway; and you all confirmed it. If feedback was "She stopped plucking? Ok, relax " then well, i would have given it as a win to my partner.

When i watch Joy napping on my shoulder, sometimes she would suddenly jerk around to "preen", it so reminds me of my own skin issue - i wake up some nights scratching. This sudden movement to pick on herself mid-napping... that had me thinking she may have some kind of skin irritation also;

Alas, in our house i am the novice bird owner and my partner has had birds much longer so when he dismisses my concerns as me being my normal "paranoid and neurotic" self, i tend to agree as unfortunately i do often overreact.

@EllenD, would it be a terrible idea to get Joy a new cage? Would it really be too much change for her?

Hope's already settled into the cage we have, and the poor baby had such a traumatic ordeal when we collected him (the breeder took about 20 minutes to catch him in his small cage). That and my two teenagers are loud and obnoxious which often frightens Hope - who then flees to a specific corner of the cage and sits there until it sees me busy in the kitchen.

 

[SilverSage]

Trust me, I understand having to fight the other half to get pets the care they need. It's not that my husband is cruel or uncaring, it's that he legitimately thinks there is no need. However he has changed his tune a bit after we had not one, but two birds die because they didn't get the care they needed in the time they needed. It's no joke. Her plucking is a cry for help; you said she is still doing it. She needs vet care ASAP. I'm sorry that your mate isn't on board but this is part of responsible parrot ownership.

And we are not suggesting they shouldn't be friends, but imagine how you would feel if your partner died and you were forced to share not just a house with a new man, but your bed? You might take comfort in his presence in the house, but wouldn't you hate having to face bed each night?

There is no such thing as paranoid when it comes to parrots, especially plucking parrots. If your human child began to self harm, you would rush to get them the help they need, right?

I'm sorry you got hope from such a lousy breeder my suggestion is to give joy back her cage, and get hope an identical cage.

Just a question; are they both DNA sexed? There is SOME SMALL chance that opposite gender IRNs may eventually share a cage safely if they choose it on their own, but caving two females together is a death sentence as maturity approaches. I love IRNs dearly; I share my life with 19 of them, but they are extremely unique and need to be treated like the unique birds that they are.


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[Pixey]

SilverSage, wow - 19? You must be a saint. I am battling to raise just my two, IRNs are not a companion for impatient and easily angered people - not even for average tempered people either! It's been a learning curve of note for me.

No, they are not DNA sexed. I am definitely going to get another cage for Hope. We do have one, but it's of such an impractical design - if he sits on the door-perch, you nearly behead him when opening it. Maybe i can modify it.

Joy's cage have mesh wire all around it - as baby, Cheeky once got his head stuck in between the bars and to safekeep, we made a plan. Will have to find mesh and do the same for Hope.

My partner introduced me to the joys of owning birds, and i trust him when advises me. The birds LOVE him - i used to get childishly jealous over how easily he can form a bond with the little ones where i have to WORK for their trust.

Cheeky was not a cuddly bird towards me, he never left my guy's side - his spot was on daddy's shoulder and he always rubbed his little head in my partners neck; almost like he had an itch right on top of his head.

Joy will vocalize easily when sitting with my partner, seldom when she is sitting with me. But she is equally happy to come to either of us.

Yes, plucking: her behaviour has lessened in aggressiveness but she is still over-preening. I know i said i trust my partner, and he adores the birds himself, but he is more predisposed to a "let nature take its course" attitude. He is convinced that Cheeky is flying free and happy with the wild IRNs that we see daily cross over. His way of dealing with the loss, i assume.

I cannot just let nature take its course - like i said to my friend who objected to me seeking out an avian vet (his position on it is "you'll pay more to have it checked out than what it cost you to buy it, just get another bird rather...") - i had my son for free, but he's cost me a small palace of money over the past 18 years. So how am i not going to seek help for my winged baby if i think she needs it?

Yes, just an animal, but such a personality! It's been a little over two years now for me around IRN's, but Joy stole my heart Dec2015 when we went to a petshop to buy our daughter a guinea pig. Walking through the birdroom, there was Joy, stuffed into a small 12x12" (looked like a small microwave) box, next to this big african grey. She made small meowing sounds, and i couldnt get over this little bird that sounded so heart-wrenchingly sad.

At the time we literally only had $80 to our names, but i carried on so much that halfway home, my partner turned the car around to get the $65 bird in addition to the $3 guinea pig we just bought. Best impulse buy ever. So all these things considered, there is little to nothing i wont do to make sure that this feathered child of mine lives her full lifespan.

I have rambled on now - thank you again for sharing with me and being so kind.

 

[EllenD]

Wow, I'm sorry you're having such a struggle...I know many people with your partner's attitude, "let nature take its course", and "The vet costs more than the bird", but my birds, dogs, and bearded dragon are my family, and it was my choice to be responsible for them so I need to be responsible for them. Joy is suffering greatly, as SilverSage said above she needs to see an avian vet immediately. Where do you live? I'm wondering if your avian vet or possibly another avian vet will take payments? It's important you take her to an avian vet, not a general dog/cat vet, as plucking after losing a mate is a serious behavioural and psychosomatic issue, and it takes an avian vet with bird experience and bird understanding to help her. Please try to get her help ASAP.

I hope your partner didn't just give up on Cheeky. I don't know where you live that you have Indian Ringnecks flying around outside, but I guess it's a saving grace that it must be a place that's warm outside right now. At least Cheeky won't freeze. The problem your partner isn't taking into consideration is that Cheeky is not a wild IRN, he lived inside with his humans and his tame mate, he was given his bird food, water, heat, shelter from the weather, and love, and was not ever before in his life required to find food and water. He has also his entire life been protected from predators. He needs to consider that even completely wild Indian Ringnecks are prey birds, and as such are constantly fighting off, flying away from, and hiding from predators. Cheeky doesn't know these skills. And I'm assuming he was bred in captivity, either by a breeder or in a pet shop or bird mill, so he most likely was not even parent raised, let alone taught about protecting himself. So he not only has to be constantly searching for food, water, and shelter, he also has to watch out for cats, dogs, racoons, foxes, wolves, etc. and most importantly predator birds like hawks, falcons, ravens, crows, eagles, etc. Then on top of this total shock of having his life flipped upside down and not knowing how to live in the wild, Cheeky also is missing his mate as much as Joy is missing her, to the point he is probably looking for her and calling for her constantly. This is why I feel badly that it sounds like your partner didn't really look for him. Most of the time when a tame bird gets lost outside, if they have a bonded mate and you put the mate in their cage outside with food they will call each other and he will come back...I'm sorry, it's upsetting for everyone involved, I'm sure. But your partner needs to realize that the fact that the bird cost less than the vet care, or that you can just get another replacement bird if she gets sick are not good enough. He took on the responsibility of buying birds voluntarily, he shouldn't give you a hard time about getting an obviously sick bird that is in great distress medical help. Plucking typically doesn't just stop on it's own, it's a very complex problem and while Joy is no doubt plucking because of Cheeky, and Hope is not going to solve that for Joy, she may very well have an underlying health issue that flared up and rapidly progressed because of the stress caused by Cheeky leaving. Do your best to get Joy to her avian vet. Have your partner read this thread and we'll be more than happy to speak to him too.

Please, I literally beg you to get Hope out of that cage immediately. Yes, you need to keep Joy in HER CAGE. It's Joy's cage no matter how she acted towards it while Cheeky was there, you absolute cannot give it to the new bird. Birds are very strict creatures of habit!!! This is why they quickly develop so many problems when there is any sort of change, like a move to a new house, new pets, new children in the house, divorce, new food, new toys, new cage, them being rehomed, every little change bothers them. So joy has lost her mate, suddenly there is this new bird in Cheeky's spot in her cage, the new bird is even sleeping where Cheeky slept...If the next change is her cage is given to the new bird and she is given a new cage she hates, I guarantee you'll have a horrible situation arise. Most likely Joy would refuse to go near the new cage, would constantly be trying to hang out on her old cage, and this is where I would almost 100% expect Joy to attack Hope for being in her cage. That's a huge no no.

Please get Hope a separate cage immediately, she is a baby and she'll be fine. The second cage you have will do just fine until you can get a newer one. Hope is a baby that everything is new to, she can handle it. Joy is already plucking...She lost her mate, there's a new bird she's so far ignoring (you need to check Hope for bald spots, little nips and cuts, etc. because I'm sure you haven't seen Joy nipping at her but it's happening, especially at night)...My point is that you need not worry about the new baby stressing over what cage she is in, she isn't attached to either one yet, and though her breeder sounds absolutely awful (though a baby IRN for $65 is unheard of, again I don't know where you are but I've never seen a baby IRN for less than $400; still, her breeder should not have to chase her for 20 minutes around the cage ), Hope can handle it...Joy cannot take much more. So please let her have her own cage back to herself, get Hope in the other cage, and when you are able financially you can buy Hope a larger, nicer cage. She doesn't need it now, she just wants to play and be loved. And once again please don't back off or back away from touching, petting, cuddling, or spending time with Joy, she needs just the opposite right now. And she needs her consistency, again she is a strict creature of habit, so try to keep her life as close to completely normal as possible.

My heart really does go out to you, I admire you very much for doing the best you can do to help your birds. I can tell you love Joy very much, and I assure you she needs you right now just as much as you need her.

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[SilverSage]

I hope nothing I have said has come across as rude or accusatory. I only want what is best for the birds, and I believe you want that too. It's very hard to have to fight your spouse on this kind of thing, I know from experience, but basically I echo all the things Ellen said.

Have you put up fliers for cheeky? Lost pet Irns CAN join wild flocks, but wolf birds would almost always kill any non green Irns. Lost pet birds are usually on the ground unable to fly within 5 days of escape, and often people who find them just keep them or turn them over to a vet or a shelter. I've dealt with dozens of people who, finding a parrot, decided to keep it because "finders keepers" sometimes if they see a missing poster it can remind them that a family is suffering and missing their baby. This happened with my friend's cockatiel. She escaped and was gone for months until one day the ladies who had found her stumbled across a missing ad for her on Facebook and decided to see if it was the same bird. After all, there was a hefty reward offered.


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[Pixey]

No offense taken, i understand that this medium of communication leaves a lot of gaps for misinterpretation.

My partner is one of the kindest, most loving souls i have ever met, and he would be the first to take Joy to the vet if she was not acting like herself. However - apart from the missing feathers, and aggression around bedtime, she is not behaving any differently than normal during the day.

Cheeky, and our search for him was an active and intense one for over four weeks. Flyers, calling rescue shelters, vets. My partner is a runner, and we adjusted our morning running route to stay close to the area where we last saw Cheeky. And now we are adjusting our route to run along the daily migration pattern of the wild flock that flies around.

On the day we lost him, we saw him in a high tree a few blocks down from where we stay. We tried to get him down (braved a rottweiler and a husky in the yard we were trespassing in - the owners were away), but there was just no way to reach him. He flew away again - extremely high and so freaking fast. It was a definitively frustrating moment for me, we lost him when he crossed paths with an IRN flock and havent been able to pick him out again visually but audibly we've heard him again.

Because i was in a severe emotional state every morning, i think my partner just let the topic cool down so that i can focus on day to day living again. But give up on Cheeky? We are waiting to see him again. I might prioritize my pet over my humans some days, but i dont think my partner was going to follow suit as he is much more grounded and realistic.

I live in South Africa, in the heart of it. We bought Cheeky for R400 and Joy for R680 - which i checked and it translates to even less than $65. We both work for ourselves as we are not in the best position in the current economic environment to find gainful employment, and we make ends meet - but between the two of us, only one car and scheduling is always a battle. Because he is trying to get his business to take off, the car (and him) is away every day all day - labour pains of a new company. Logistics is a nightmare.

I do have a stark difference in opinion with my partner on how to handle the birds, but i am always trying to get my facts straight, as i dont trust my "gut". My partner trusts his instincts, and because it worked out for Cheeky and Joy this is proof to him that birds can adapt to living together. Although he is not opposed to the idea of a second cage, but it did take months of nagging from my side to source it.

He was against getting another bird, Cheeky was his little baby. It was only on account of my meltdown that he decided to get Joy another companion, because he knows how fond i am of my Joy.

We are keeping the birds separate as suggested and i am keeping a close eye on Joy. I frantically searched for experts to consult because i had my doubts, and this seemed like the perfect platform - so i do definitely take all advice to heart. Thank you <3

Money is tight right now, that's for sure, but we are surviving by the grace of God and I am sure that when i take Joy to the vet this week, He will provide for this.

On a happier note, Joy was very bubbly today and i spotted new feathers emerging. She has definitely calmed down, although i am too petrified of leaving them two alone in a cage at night now Still taking her to the vet on account of my "better safe than sorry" paranoia and because i suspect she might have a "skin condition" - silly as that may sound.

My partner also hosed their cages down today with a water pressure hose machine (made a helluva noise) so everything here is sparkly clean

Oh, i also checked Hope for any scratches or marks - all good. He climbed up on me today, scooted up my shirt like he just watched "Cliffhanger" - but he still distrusts hands. We also spent a good two hours chatting with Joy, she was a real babbling brook today.

 

[EllenD]

I hope nothing I have said has come across as rude or accusatory. I only want what is best for the birds, and I believe you want that too. It's very hard to have to fight your spouse on this kind of thing, I know from experience, but basically I echo all the things Ellen said.

Have you put up fliers for cheeky? Lost pet Irns CAN join wild flocks, but wolf birds would almost always kill any non green Irns. Lost pet birds are usually on the ground unable to fly within 5 days of escape, and often people who find them just keep them or turn them over to a vet or a shelter. I've dealt with dozens of people who, finding a parrot, decided to keep it because "finders keepers" sometimes if they see a missing poster it can remind them that a family is suffering and missing their baby. This happened with my friend's cockatiel. She escaped and was gone for months until one day the ladies who had found her stumbled across a missing ad for her on Facebook and decided to see if it was the same bird. After all, there was a hefty reward offered.


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I'll echo the same sentiment as SilverSage, I meant absolutely no disrespect and did not mean to seem pushy. I tend to get passionate about pets, and unfortunately (and I'm not at all talking about you) there are people that ask for help because they have their birds in a situation that has either put them in danger, hurt them, or more often than not it has to do with breeding their birds with absolutely no clue what could go wrong, they expect the parent birds to just make everything go perfectly. So when it doesn't they ask for advice and we give it to them (sometimes it is very difficult to not get horribly angry when they say they never even bought formula or a syringe just in case they had to hand feed a baby), and it ends badly, usually with a bird dying. As SilverSage said previously I would not push the issue of the second cage if I hadn't seen so many badly injured or killed birds. Trust me, people very often go and get a second bird, usually young, and they post a photo of the new bird locked in a cage with their first bird, have no other cage, and they see no need to move them even though everyone is telling them what could happen. Everything is fine for days, a week...Then their next post is about how their original bird just suddenly turned and bit the new bird's beak off. Once you've seen those things happen it sticks with you and you'll do anything you can to prevent it from happening again. You've been very proactive and you sought out help because you care very much for your bird's, that's obvious. We appreciate you doing everything you do for them and for being a responsible owner.

I think I took what you said about your partner the wrong way, and I apologize for that, I was under the impression that he was OK with just "replacing" your bird that is lost, and that you were not OK with that. I'm very happy that he was looking for Cheeky and continues to, when you said that he thought it was fine, that Cheeky was happy with the wild birds, I thought he hadn't looked for him at all. You're correct that sometimes it's very difficult to get what you're trying to say across when typing it! Drives me crazy! But I am sorry for the misunderstanding, and I'm glad you're in South Africa where it is warm! At least Cheeky is warm. I'm in Pennsylvania, it's the middle of our cold, dark, wet winter and a neighbor of mine had her cockatiel slip out the door just before Christmas. He's been spotted with a flock of wild sparrows so we know he's close and alive, but it gets down below 10 degrees Fahrenheit at night, so she just cries and cries about her little Zeno being so cold. It's just so sad, we all have cages outside in our yards with food and toys hoping he'll come back. I hope that you can spot Cheeky in the IRN flock soon, a parrot here in a wild flock sticks out like a sore thumb so it's not one of the problems we have, though lost parrots do often join up with flocks of wild birds here, they are just not at all the same type of birds, lol. Much easier to see and hear a parrot in the middle of a flock of sparrows!

I'm glad you got the birds separated and that joy has pin feathers growing in. I promise she'll be under much less stress now, and hopefully you can let her acclimate to the new bird slowly, and eventually they become close. I'm also glad you're getting Joy to the avian vet, you're correct that she may very well have a skin, feather, or parasite/infection going on that was exacerbated by the stress of losing Cheeky. I hope she continues to grow her feathers in and there's no other ailments she needs to be treated for, she deserves a break! Please always ask any questions you might have or let us know if you have anything you need to talk about regarding your birds anytime. We care about their well-being quite a bit and will never lead you astray.

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[Pixey]

Thanks guys, i have searched this forum before for answers to other questions that i had and i was duly aware of it that the members here are passionate about their pets (which is why i decided to join).

It has truly been a difficult year, i have never owned a pet before in my life and i was sincerely stunned by the depth of grief i felt when we lost Cheeky. He was not even my bird, just a bird in the house.

Never before in my life have i understood how people could get so attached to their animals, almost more than they get attached to their human companions. Until i've acquired Joy and got to know her. She is quite a little personality and i dearly love her to bits.

Please accept my apologies as i may have been a bit more negative towards my partner and his attitude than what is fair to him. I want things done MY way and he is just as stubborn as me - unstoppable object meet immovable force.

Your advice definitely do not fall on deaf "eyes" as i really needed to consult with avian experts and make sure i am doing things right - especially when my good-intention-actions did not pay off as expected with adding a new member to the family.

I am terrified that the birds will hurt each other, as i do see them nipping at one another if they get too close. Hope is very brave today and venturing away from the clonky cage - Joy always roams about freely as she desires, this is her house and it's been "Bird Proofed" ages ago already.

Last week my heart skipped a beat every morning before i opened them up in the mornings, as i have a very paranoid mind and it's always imagining the worst. Now i can relax somewhat.

 

[EllenD]

Pixey,

I just wanted to check in with you and see first how you are doing, and also how Joy is doing, and how she and the new Hope are acclimating to their new family! I was thinking about you yesterday, there have been quite a few IRN posts lately with photos and they made me wonder how you are doing. You were so stressed out about Joy's plucking and then bringing the new baby home and how it was either Joy's health, I hope very much that things have settled down and your birds are both doing very well, and that Joy is getting better every day!

Please check in and let us know how everyone is and how everything is going.


Sent from my XT1575 using Tapatalk

 

[Pixey]

Hey EllenD, thank you for checking in <3

I had this long reply typed up, but i kept on being interrupted. And now when i finally got to posting it this morning, i was signed out in the background - then when i hit the "back" button, my reply was gone

Joy is well, no signs of being sick (i monitor her still). She doesnt pluck at all anymore, but she is very skinny due to all the feathers that is lost. I am freaking out about it quite a bit, but i keep losing the fight to take her to the vet ASAP - no matter how demanding or insistent i am. It's frustrating as hell when you dont have your own transport. The party who has the car is of opinion that she is busy healing and not stressed anymore, so we must just give her time to recover.

But just how long should it take for her feathers to grow back? I dont want to live the next four months in suspense, MY OWN stress levels now cannot handle it - my eczema is so bad lately, i am literally starting to lose hair from all the scratching myself. (It's for some stupid reason now spread to my scalp!!!).

Hope is doing great <3 he is a sweety and really coming out of his shell. I still keep them in their own cages, but Hope is NOT a fan of his cage. But he is relaxed around us now, although we are still not allowed to touch him, he steps up happily when HE wants to (but bites gently when requested). Even tempered bird, and makes soft moaning sounds that really tugs on my heart - i always worry that he is unhappy (he SOUNDS it, if a human made the same noises, you would think they are anyway).

But he is lively,eats well, LOVES peanuts.

Joy is paying somewhat more attention to him lately, but they are still wary of each other.