Aggressive Yellow Naped Amazon

[ddricci]

I have had Arnold for approximately 36 years - I believe that she is very likely around 42 years old. Arnold is a hen, despite her name. My wife and I discovered her sex shortly after she moved in with us as she nested and laid an egg - she did this several times over the course of her life with us, but not within the last 15 years or so.

She is an interesting and quite talkative creature but in addition to discovering her sex after we bought her, we also discovered that she simply could not tolerate male humans. As a result she has been aggressive toward me for all of the time that I have known her. She loves any female human and would immediately bond with them - flirting with them, allowing them to scratch her neck, or perhaps to climb all over them. Her behavior toward me is at best indifference or aggression. Her aggression toward human males in NOT limited to me - she simply dislikes any male that approaches. In the 36 years that I have been around her I have never seen her non aggressive toward a male.

While my wife was alive, I accepted this as a way of life. My wife passed away almost 4 years ago and am starting to wonder if Arnold might now be happier with another owner - perhaps a house full of female humans.
I am asking the bird universe if anyone is familiar with this sort of behavior.
Is there any method of training that might alleviate it?
Would anyone know if perhaps this is a hormone issue only? I'm not inclined to think that she would ever grow out of this as it seems so deep seated and ingrained.

Any guidance or advice is appreciated -

Thanks,
Dominic

 

[SailBoat]

First, welcome to Parrot Forums!

I am very sorry for the loss of your dear wife. It has likely been as difficult for your Amazon as it has been for you, which means that they also grieve the loss of a family member.

Regarding your relationship with your Amazon, lets look at a few basics as in many cases they can be missed even in long term relationships.

Some Reading: See the top two Threads (Sticky Threads) High lighted in light blue. The second Thread is: Understanding Amazon Body Language. Read this one as if you are learning a new Language, but you want to learn it as if it will be your first language. The first Thread is: I Love Amazons - ... This huge Thread is the foundation to living and loving Amazons. It also provides extensive insights into the Wonderful World of Amazons. Sit down next to your Amazon and read both in a soft comforting voice.

Lets consider changing your 'Vantage Point.'
It is Never the Fault of the Amazon!
It is Always the Fault of the Human!
When you look at your interaction with your Amazon from this vantage point you will quickly begin to see where you need to change your interactions and work at developing a new relationship.

Its time to start all over again with developing a new relationship with your Amazon. Amazons are all about Emotions! They quickly tune into our Emotions and are commonly a reflection of the Emotion back at us. Amazons demand that you understand their language and they are quick to to pick-up on when you don't.

Should you move on and leave your Amazon to another possibly a female. That is a question of the heart and I cannot see yours. That said, we currently have a Amazon that Loves my dear wife. But, when we began working with him, we assure that the one on the outs got to provide all the good Stuff. That brings into play another one of the basics: Only good things happen when Humans are around.

In your Amazons Long Life, you have been a foundation in her World. When your dear wife passed a larger part of her World also passed. Whether you think she likes you or not, you are an important part of what little she has left of her life. If you now disappear, she has nothing, no connection to her long life. She has been attempting to understand her loss. If you change your Vantage Point, maybe you can help her and you find a new relationship.

Welcome to a very new Wonderful World of Amazons!

 

[AmyMyBlueFront]

Your Arnold is a female,and my Amy is a male! I found that out a few years ago when I finally decided to have "her" DNA'd,for my peace of mind,and so his Certified Avian Vet,who has been treating him since he was four months old (just turned twenty-nine this month) would have it in Amy's records.


I made it a point,from day one,to socialize Amy. He goes every where with me,weather permitting,and is always meeting "new" people,and will go to just about anyone,male or female. However,initially,Amy didn't care for females,except my mom. Amy would chase my ex-wife down the hall with arms out wide,rudder flaired,beak open,but would then climb the recliner and sit in my moms lap and help himself to whatever mom was eating.

Mom passed away about twelve years ago,leaving just me and Smokey the Grey. Amy is strongly bonded to me,but when mom passed,I could tell Amy was deeply hurt! He sat on his night-night perch all day,only to come down to eat a bit and have a drink. He wouldn't even come out of his house!

A few weeks later,as I was laying on the couch,still trying to figure out what was next in my life,Amy came out of his house,walked to the couch,climbed up and snuggled under my chin! He could sense my emotions,that I too was grieving and he gave me comfort! He snuggled with me (which he had never done before) he softly preened my beard and mumbled endearing Amazon sounds in my ear!

From that day on,he became the most loving bird,to me at least,that I have ever had (except maybe for BB the cockatiel lol)


What Steven ( 'Boats) has posted,they are an emotional creature and can sense how we feel..please don't give up on Arnold,she needs you as much as you need her!



Jim

 

[Anita1250]

It is possible for Arnold to love again. I have had my Sam, a 36 year old BFA for a looooong time. My first husband passed away in 2003. Sam loved him and tolerated me. I did remarry in 2006, and Sam has become very close to my new husband. It took some time, but now they get along great. I think it has even helped my relationship with Sam. We are now closer as well. Perhaps give her some time. It is as traumatic for these birds to lose a human as it is for us to lose our mates. She may surprise you and become closer to you as well.